


A Little Unsteady

by TheBlackHorizon



Series: A Little Unsteady & Companion Pieces [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Boys Kissing, Character Development, Fluff and Angst, Idiots in Love, M/M, Male-Female Friendship, Physical Disability, Romance, a bit of smut, body issues, unrelated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-05-17 16:06:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 59
Words: 49,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5877076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBlackHorizon/pseuds/TheBlackHorizon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in Wintertown, a city in the North where university student Robb Stark finds love in an unexpected place.</p><p> <br/>Mind you, lots of bad words can be found in this one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Big Bang-Rock Mafia

**Author's Note:**

> Unbowed, unbent, unbetad. All mistakes are mine.
> 
> Just decided to name some chapters after the songs I listened to while writing them because they had a great influence on the chapter.  
> Put them on while reading them if you like:)

„Why are you still single?"

Robb looked up „Sorry?“

Arya flopped down on the couch next to him „I mean there's no obvious reason, you're neither ugly nor stupid.“

His eyebrows shot up „Thanks?“

„No offence I was just wondering.“ She laughed.

"Dinner's ready!"

 

He'd left his familys house after dinner and was on is way back to his flat when Aryas words came back to his mind. Right, why was he single again?  
He was 24 with a nice flat, good grades at uni and a great social life, so thanks very much but why did all the at least decent looking guys seem to ignore him?  
Good question.  
Want to know the answer? Sorry, no idea.  
Robb unlocked his door and stepped inside, shrugging off his jacket. The apartment was empty. He pulled out his phone without really noticing

„I'm one step away from buying a cat, distract me!“

Theon laughed „You just need to get laid mate.“

„You offerin'?“

When the line clicked Robb was grinning like a cat that got the cream.  
The doorbell rang fifteen minutes later when Robb walked out of the shower with nothing but a towel around his waist. He didn't bother putting something on before opening the door.

„I'm gonna wipe that shit-eating grin off your face.“ Theon said before crashing their lips together.

Afterwards they lay on the couch in a mess of tangled limbs, both smoking.

„I think I'll get a cat.“

„Your so messed up“ Theon blew out the smoke through the corner of his mouth and turned to face Robb „But really, what's the matter with you? Never saw you like this before all sulky and stuff.“

„I don't know it's just,“ he paused, his eyes fixed on the ceiling „I feel like there's more than just random sex out there you know“

Theon grinned „It's called growing up my friend.“

„You think?“

„That's what they say isn't it?“ he replied „Shitload of boring stuff.“

„And you say I'm the fucked up one.“

Half an hour later, Theon left.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning his phone rang way too early. His hand shot out from underneath his comforter, trying to find it on the bedside table.

„Hello?“

„Did I wake you?“ his mother asked in a slightly amused tone.

„Uh, yeah you could say that.“ he sat up and rubbed his eyes „What's up?“

„Well, I told you about this wonderful old chair I found in the shed the other day, didn't I?“

„I guess.“ 

„The thing is it needs refurbishment.“

„Ask me.“

„Could you come over and take it to Mormont? Your father and I are busy today and Sansa is visiting your aunt.“

„Okay,“ he threw his comforter aside and started padding towards the bathroom „Give me half an hour.“

He hung up, showered and got dressed. Last night had left a bitter taste in his mouth. Sex with Theon was great, no one could deny that, but when he had left in the middle of the night it made the feeling of loneliness after get even worse. He got some coffee at the little shop down the street and arrived at his parents just in time to find Arya leaving the house with a boy in tow.  
His mother stood at the front door, waving after them with a slightly strained smile on her face.

Robb tuck his thumb in their direction „Did I miss something?“

„Not really, she brought him home for breakfast this morning.“ she walked to the garage „We like him.“

„Oh do we?“ Robb shot a her a questioning look.

„Obviously,“ she laughed „We don't have much of a choice do we.“

She opened the garage door and revealed an old, slightly shabby wooden chair. 

„It's nice isn't it? It's going to look great when it's all new again.“ she said with an enthusiastic smile while Robb put it in the boot of his fathers Range Rover.

„Absolutely.“ 

Catelyn overheard the hint of sarcasm in his voice and tossed him the keys „Thanks a lot darling!"

The shop was located in a small street in the older part of Wintertown, close to the walls of the ancient castle. Robb took the chair from the boot and pushed the door open, the chiming of an old doorbell announcing his arrival, but no one was to be seen. 

„Hello?“

No answer. He checked the opening hours printed on the door.

„Anyone here?“

He started looking around the shop while waiting, taking in the old silver till on a big wooden table across the door, a few already refurbished pieces of furniture and a few that looked new. He started thinking about to whom they belonged to and what they had looked like before.  
The sound of sandpaper on wood coming from the door behind the till interrupted his musings. He hesitated for a moment and then slowly opened it.  
The door let into the workshop, the smell of wood and stain filled his nose. He looked around and spotted a man sitting cross legged on a table emerising it. He wore a black shirt and grey work pants ,his longish hair tied in a bun.

„Excuse me?“

The others head shot up and he stared at Robb „What are you doing in here?“

Robb was struck for a moment „A chair.“ he stuttered „I wanted to bring a chair.“ he felt like his face was glowing red „You know for refurbishment, that's what you do isn't it?“ He babbled. Since when did he get nervous in the presence of hot strangers?

„Oh alright, the door wasn't locked was it?“ he asked, his face still serious.

„Uh, no.“

The other man nodded „Um, my colleague usually takes in new orders but she's gone out to get some lunch and obviously forgot to lock the door.“ he sounded slightly annoyed. 

„I can come back later.“ Robb chimed.

„No it's fine.” he put aside the sandpaper and gave Robb a slight smile “Just give me a second.“

Robb watched as he bend down and reached under the table, pulling out a black wheelchair. He transferred in one fluent motion and Robb followed him trough the door to the counter.

„Alright, your name please?”

„Robb Stark.”

„And it's just the chair?”

„Yes. I suppose my mum wants it cleaned up a bit.“

He looked at the shabby old thing next to Robb and smirked „Understandable. It should be ready within a week, we'll give you a ring then.“

He handed Robb the paper.

„Thanks,um?“

„Jon Snow.“

„Well thanks then Jon Snow.“


	3. Worry-Jack Garratt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hFP3qh1x1Zo

„Who is he?“ 

„Who?“

„The guy you lusted after this afternoon.“ Ygritte smirked and tore a piece off her pita bread.

„I didn't lust after anyone.“ Jon snapped.

They sat together in their small kitchen sharing some takeaway after they had closed up for the day.

„Oh please!“ she waved her bread in front of Jons face „I only saw him when he left but I have to say you have good taste.“

„By the way, lock the door next time you leave, I don't need another stranger wandering around.“

„Yes mum.“ Ygritte rolled her eyes „ But honestly, you like the guy don't you?“

Jon stared at his hands. 

„I knew it! His number's on the order sheet you know.“ she winked.

„So?“

„Oh you know nothing Jon Snow, just call him or whatever.“

„What's the point of it? I mean he's probably straight as a line and got a girlfriend or something.“

„Your excuses are lame. Besides, didn't you make him blush like a maid?“ she drawled.

„Even if he's gay., still...“

„Still what?“

„You know what. Just leave it alright.“

„You think he won't like you because of your legs.“ she deadpanned

„Well done Sherlock.“ Jon said dryly.

She reached over the table and put her hands on his „I know you haven't dated anyone since, but don't you think he'd be a good start?“

Jon chewed on his lip and nodded „You know why?“

Ygritte shook her head.

„I was working on the big dinner table when he came in, and to take his order I had to transfer down, and he didn't stare you know.“

Ygritte smiled „You know what you're gonna do? When he comes round to pick up his order, you're gonna ask him out. I mean, what's the worst that can happen?“

„That he's straight? Or that he prefers a non-paraplegic boyfriend?“ he answered with bitterness in his voice „You're right, I like him. He's attractive and so fucking cute.“

„You're nice and not what I'd call ugly. Even that rat-faced Frey girl has a boyfriend nowadays, why shouldn't you?“

“God I feel like we're in secondary school again.”


	4. Stray Cat Blues-The Rolling Stones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsBiKga7Z_8

„I think I've got butterflies.“

„Really? What are you, twelve?“ Theon shot Robb a look of utter disbelief and took another sip from his pint.

„Yeah thanks very much mate.“

„So who's the lucky bastard then?“

„The guy that refurbishes my mums old chair.“

„Details please? I wanna know who's gonna replace me and my dick!“

Robb smiled „His name's Jon and I haven't even talked to him. I mean I did, but only for the order sheet, no real talk you know. And there's another thing.“ He hesitated „He's in a wheelchair you know.“

Theons eyebrows shot up „Okay.“

„Yeah I know, but I saw him and...you know...butterflies erupted and all that shit. And now all I can think of is this fucking beautiful face of his.“

„Ask him out when you pick up your mums chair.“

Robb hadn't replied to Theon's suggestion and an hour after they had left the pub.  
Later in bed he found himself unable to sleep, all he could think about where black curls and full lips. What had this man done to him? His thoughts returned to the woman who had entered the shop when he'd left, he's heard him calling her Ygritte. Girlfriend or colleague? Even if she was just a colleague, who knew if Jon was into men?  
Too many questions were swirling around in his head.  
He got up again and grabbed his laptop, perhaps Facebook knew what he didn't.  
Jon Snow-No matching results. Okay, that didn't help at all. Slightly frustrated he went to bed again but sleep didn't come easy.  
The next morning he was supposed to work in his term paper but his brain plainly refused to cooperate.  
Oh dear. Why was everything so confusing all of a sudden? Right, because he had a huge crush and his hormones decided to make his brain become jelly and his wits disappear. He lit up a cigarette.  
Remembering how he had started to babble under Jons intense look made him want to dig a hole and hide in it. He'd never been good at talking to people he didn't know but never had someone made him go weak in the knees like that. Theon made it sound so easy, just go ahead and ask him out, but for Robb it wasn't that easy. He could name at least 20 arguments why he would certainly not do that right away, but there was one that invalidated them all.  
What if he likes me back?  
Oh, and speaking of invalid. Another reason to question a possible date. Or was it? Right now, it didn't really make a difference to him, but would it stay like this?  
Robb ran a hand trough his hair. Too many fucking questions.  
Before he knew it he had grabbed his jacket and left.

When he chained his mountain bike to a lamppost about half an hour later he already started to doubt his decision. He looked across the street. Mormont&Co-Furniture it said in white letters on the shop window.  
“Alright...” he mumbled and crossed the street.  
When he opened the door Jon looked up from the papers on the desk.

“Oh, hi again.”  
He smiled. Oh dear. Robb had expected Ygritte to be there and had already thought about what to say to her. Okay, extemprovise!

“Hi.” Well done.

“Can I help?”

“Uh yeah,” there it was again, the intense look.

Jon raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, sorry but I happen to be really shit at this, I just wanted to ask if we could, I don't know, go for a drink sometime, I mean, I know we don't know each other or anything, I was just wondering because...”

“Hey, stop, I'm not gonna eat you alive or anything.” Jon laughed.

Robb scratched the back of his head. A man laughing was never a good sign.

“But in answer to you question,” he wheeled himself right in front of Robb “I'd love to. But going out is not really an option at the moment because there's a shitload of work waiting for me.”

Robbs shoulders sagged a bit “It's alright.”

“But I could offer you some cheap coffee back in the workshop.”

“Do you mean like, now?” he asked, a surprised look on his face.

“I was going to close the shop in about 10 minutes anyway to work on the furniture, so yeah, basically now.” he was grinning again “Only if you're not busy of course.”

“No,no not really. I should probably work on my term paper but, you know.” Robb said nonchalantly and put his hands in his pockets.

“What are you studying?” Jon asked as he locked the front door.

“Company law. I thought you weren't the one taking in new orders.” Robb smirked and followed Jon into the workshop.

“Ygritte's got an appointment with the bank so today I am.”

“Is the shop yours?”

“Ygrittes and mine yeah. We've been working for Mr. Mormont since we were 16.” They arrived in a little kitchenette in the back of the room “Tea or Coffee?”

“Tea please.” he answered and sat down at the small table.

“Mr. Mormont died about a year ago and since he didn't have any children he left us the shop.” Jon continued as he put the kettle on.

Robb chewed on his lip for a moment “Are you two,um..like...”

“Friends,” he turned around to face Robb “We grew up together. Besides, girls have never been my bag you know.”

Robb looked at his hands and when he raised his eyes again he found Jon looking at him. Warmth spread in his chest as he took in Jons full lips, eyes like melted chocolate and the mass of black curls framing his face “Mine neither.” he said softly.

At that very moment the door opened “Oi, fluffhead! I could hear the piping of the kettle at the front door!”

Ygritte walked into the workshop but stopped abruptly as she saw them “Hello there.” she said grinning.

“Hi, I'm Robb.”

“Ygritte, hi." she raised her hand " Sorry, I just have to pick something up from the flat, I'll be gone in a minute.” she rushed past them and out of the back door.

Robb tried to stifle a laugh with the back of his hand.

He raised an eyebrow “Yeah go on, laugh.”

Jon turned off the stove and handed the still smiling Robb the steaming mug “Her timing is excellent.”

“Yeah.” Jon was smiling as well “We share the flat behind the workshop.”

“She reminds me of one of my sisters, Arya, she once walked in on me and my ex-boyfriend, most awkward moment of my life.” Robb took a sip of his tea.

“How many sisters have you got?”

“Two,”the easy chatter between them eased Robbs nerves “And two brothers. I'm the oldest.”

“Wow, it's a big family.”

“Yeah our house always used to be a bit, well, crowded.”

“I can imagine.” Jon smiled again and Robb couldn't stop himself from smiling as well. Everything seemed so easy in that moment just sitting here, chatting and laughing.

“What about you? Have you got any siblings?”

“No, my parents died when I was a baby.”

Robb bit his lip “Shit, sorry.”

“I never knew them so it wasn't really a loss, Ygritte's my family.”

They were both smiling again, Robb wanted this moment to never end.

“Look, I don't want to throw you out or anything but I have a lot of work to do. You can stay if you want.”

“If you don't mind.”

“Why would I?” he wheeled over to the workbench and grabbed some sandpaper “There may be some biscuits in the drawer but I'd take a look at the best-before date before eating them.”

Robb opened the drawer and found a package of shortbread that looked like it had been in there since the shop had been opened.

“I don't think I should eat that.” Robb laughed and looked over to Jon to see him transfer up on the table.

“These have gone off ages ago” he said walking over to the table “I mean look at the package, it looks like its from the nineties or something and...”

“You're cute when you're babbling.” Jon interrupted him.

Robbs knees felt like jelly “I...”

A second later he was pulled forward by the hem of his shirt and his lips collided with Jons.  
He felt the heat of the other mans skin against his own, the feeling of soft lips and warm hands on his shoulders made his mind go blank, the only thing that counted right now was the feeling.  
When they broke apart both were silent for a moment.

“Wow.” Robb breathed “That was unexpected.”

 

 

Robb stayed in the shop the whole afternoon. They talked and just enjoyed each others company while Jon had worked. It was already dark outside when he left with the promise of a phone call and a warm feeling in his stomach.


	5. Save Tonight-Eagle Eye Cherry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zHxnm1-gVS4

He lasted two days.  
In those forty-eight hours he had been more productive than in the last three weeks, he'd worked on his term paper almost non-stop, only taking a break to get some food and sleep.  
It was getting dark outside when he decided that he'd worked enough for two days and ended up calling Jon. 

“Do you shelter term-paper refugees?”

–

“'Gritte?”

“Hmm” she didn't look up from her crossword 

“Robb's coming over.”

Her head shot up “Really? Whatcha two up to?”

“Don't know, maybe watch a movie or something.” he shrugged.

“You know exactly what watch a movie stands for, my friend Jon” she singsonged 

He rolled his eyes “Just be nice okay.” 

“I'm always nice.” she said and crossed her arms over her chest.

Jon was about to reply something when he heard a knock on the front door. 

“Just put a sock on the doorknob in case of, you know, intercourse!” Ygritte winked and grinned sheepishly. 

“Would you please shut up!”

“Would you please shut up!” she mocked his voice “You better open the door if you don't want your date turning into an iced-lolly.”

“What have I done to deserve this.” 

–

Robb stood in front of the wooden door shifting his weight from one foot to another, partly from nerves partly from the cold. In the last few days Wintertown truly had lived up to its name, it was freezing cold and snowing lightly.  
After a few moments the door opened.

“Hi.”

“You look like you're freezing, come on in.” 

Robb smiled and stepped inside, the warmth of the apartment already making his fingertips prickle.

“How long have you been standing out there?” Jon asked as he watched Robb taking off his coat and scarf. 

“Not too long but I cycled here.” he stepped out of his boots.

Jon raised an eyebrow “Come on let's get you warm.”

When they entered the living room Ygritte looked up from her crossword again.

“Hiya.”

“Hi, nice to see you again.” Robb said with a smile. 

With a slight smile she looked back and forth between Robb and Jon “I'll leave the couch to you two.” she gathered up her magazine and tapped Jons shoulder with her pen “You can thank me later darling.”

“Sorry for that.” they went over to large leather couch “ actually she's really nice though she has a bit of a...”

“Big brother complex?”

“Yeah.” Jon laughed “Something you're familiar with?” he asked as he transferred onto the couch.

“Kind of.”Robb answered impishly “One of my sisters has a boyfriend now and she hasn't even introduced him. I think she doesn't want me to threaten him...”

“Shovel talk?”

“Yeah.” Robb rubbed his hands together to warm them. 

“You still cold?” 

“A bit.”

“Most people would have taken a bus in this weather.”

Robb shruggged “I know but I like cycling. In any weather.”

Jon smiled “Ygritte made a pot of tea earlier, maybe she left us some.” 

While Jon was gone Robb had some time to look around. There was an old bookshelf next to the TV that was so stuffed with books, CDs and records that the shelves were sagging, the small desk in the far corner of the room was littered with sketches of furniture and other drawings and lots of photos covered the light blue walls. He also noticed that all the counters and cabinets in the kitchen were lower than usual.  
Jon came back fro the kitchen, a tray with a teapot and two cups on his lap.

“I like your apartment.” Robb said as Jon put the tray on the table “It's really like, homely.”

“Most of the time it's messy.” he grinned “Ygritte is not the biggest fan of tidiness.”

“Anyway, I like it.” Robb replied, pouring himself some tea and curling his hands around the steaming mug “Oh by the way, I brought something!” hew put down the mug and went back to the hallway, fishing a DVD from the inside pocket of his duffel coat.

“You said you never watched The Avengers ” he held it up when he returned to the couch “and I do not want to withhold this piece of art from you.” 

“Well then bring it on.”

They were about half an hour into the movie when Jon said “You know what I've been wondering about the whole time?” 

“No.”

“Every time Bruce Banner becomes the Hulk you know, no matter what he was wearing before, when he's big and green he always wears purple shorts, but where did he hide those obviously huge shorts when he was normal?”

“What?” Robb laughed.

“It's a serious question!” Jon tried to keep a serious expression but failing miserably “It doesn't make any sense.”

“It's making perfect sense!”

“Why?”

“'Cause if it weren't for those shorts we'd see a huge green dick now.”

“At least that would be realistic!”

“You're so full of shit.”

They were both laughing again and bumping their shoulders together. They returned to light conversation and Robb watched Jons lips move when he talked and his long lashes flicker up and down with each blink. 

“I'd really like to kiss you.” 

Jon turned his head towards him and they shared a long look before Robb leaned in and brought their lips together, tender and sweet at first but soon it was all tongue and colliding teeth.  
When they separated for a moment Robb wanted nothing else than grab a handful of Jons curls and pick up where they left off, but he felt a firm hand on his chest. 

“Listen, um there's something...” Jon hesitated “It's just that I haven't really dated someone since the accident you know and I don't know if...” he trailed off 

“Everything works as it should?”  
Jon scratched the back of his head “Basically, yeah. I kind of like being with you so you know, I thought you should know.”

Robb grinned “Now you're kind of babbling.”

Jon shrugged “Maybe.”

“Look, let's just see how it goes. Neither of us knows know what's going to happen so let's just wait and see?” he knew it sounded naïve but why make things complicated?

“You're right.” he smiled “Let's see how it goes. Oh my, look.” he added when he caught a glimpse of the window behind Robb.  
The light snow had turned into a full grown snow flurry.  
“Dear, that's a lot of snow.”  
“You're not gonna cycle home in this weather,” Jon sounded determined “Take the couch.”

The next morning Robb woke up with his face buried in a fluffy green pillow.  
He blinked tiredly and started to realize where he was. Last night, snow storm, a few drinks.  
A slight headache started forming behind his eyes and he rolled over, his gaze falling on the note on the coffee table 

Had to work, coffee's in the kitchen, guess you'll need one  
-J

Robb smiled and got up. He neatly folded the woollen blanket and he had slept under and went over to the shop. 

“Good morning.” Jon greeted him as he entered.

“Hey, thanks for letting me sleep on the couch.” 

“No worries.” he smiled “Anytime.”

A kiss followed and later Robb felt like he was cycling home on pink fluffy clouds instead of dirty snow.


	6. Same Love-Macklemore&Ryan Lewis feat Mary Lambert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mINGKrtG3iw

“So what do you do if your client does not want this paragraph to be executed? That's a very good question!”

A few days later Robb was at uni and bored out of his mind. He really liked his degree course but some lectures happened to be so boring that valium was a wake up call compared to those.  
His phone buzzed signalling a new text

-Showed you mine, show me yours? -J -

Robb felt his cheeks heat up and hid his phone behind his knee to keep the girl sitting next to him from looking on the screen. -??? :D-

-Your apartment :D what where u thinking of^^-

Robb stifled a laugh -U free tomorrow n8?-

-Just have to finish up your order ;) any stairs 2b aware of?-

-Nope :)-

“Are you sexting?” 

“No.” Jon inconspicuously put away his phone.

“I know you did but I'm happy for you” Ygritte smiled “and now you can be happy for me as well.”

“Made a date with Orell then?”

“Yup.”

“You know what I think about him.”

They both knew Orell since secondary school and while Ygritte had always liked him, Jon despised him, especially when Orell had started making fun if him after it got public than Jon liked boys. Jon had put a stop to that by breaking his nose.  
Orell had gone to college and was now working in research about how traffic lights affected birds.

“I know you don't like him.”

“I think he's a bird fucking mental.” 

“You're the king of being straightforward thanks a lot, but I'll still go on that date and get laid.” 

They both laughed. Ygritte had always appreciated his directness, she knew he wasn't particularly good with words, but she could always count on his honesty. They were both orphaned when they were little and best friends since the day they met in the backyard of the orphanage.  
She had pulled his hair and he stole her ice cream. The next day he had offered her his chocolate bar and they shared it.  
They were inseparable since that day, she'd helped him coming out and he had punched her first boyfriend for kissing another girl on a party. Afterwards they'd shared a box of doughnuts and watched The Shining.  
Growing older they'd started rebelling against pretty much everything and everyone, spraying 'fuck the system' on a pier, wearing black and swearing.  
Ygritte kept the attitude, Jon the black clothes and the dirty mouth.  
After the accident she had stayed in the hospital until the staff threw her out, every day for a whole week until Jon had opened his eyes and smiled at her.  
The first night he had spent at home after months in hospital and rehab they'd slept together in Jons bed. They'd laid face to face, her hand resting on his wet cheek until they'd both fallen asleep.  
Three years had passed since that night and a lot had changed, but they would always be Jon and Ygritte.


	7. Next To Me-Emeli Sandé

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nwdjQmc_N8

After reading 'Not that kind of girl' * Sansa suggested Robb should make a list of 10 things he'd learned over the years.  
He'd just rolled his eyes and said "I may be gay but that's a girl thing, blokes don't do that kind of stuff."  
Two days later he'd found himself sitting at his desk, a sheet of paper in front of him, tapping his chin with a biro he'd nicked at Tesco down the street. 

1\. Sisters know everything.

Yes, he'd definitely learned that over the years. When he'd first been shagging Theon he hadn't told anyone, but when he met up with Arya a few days after she'd just said "He's a dickhead and you know it.  
Turned out he wasn't, but that's not the point.  
Point is:

2\. Never shag a guy you haven't met at least twice. Otherwise be prepared for surprises.

3\. Relationships are better than shagging guys you only met twice. 

He's had two serious relationships in his life and even the worst days in a relationship made him happier than the best day of his single life. Robb knew how cheesy and teenage-girl like it was, but why not want something steady? 

4\. As long as you don't watch Bridget Jones's Diary with a bowl of ice cream on a Saturday night you're not as badly off as you think.

Wait, was that too superficial? This list had a purpose, a reflection of what life had taught him over the years. Important things that really changed his view on life.  
Like taking a guy home he met a few hours earlier at a pub, only to find out said guy wore girls underwear. That night had definitely changed his view on things, see 2.

5\. Living alone sounds better than it actually is.

6\. Be nice. It won't save you from getting your purse nicked but it'll make the policeman like you better.

7\. Never go to a house party unless you know that at least one person you know is invited as well. Otherwise you're going to end up being the strange guy no one knows and the creepy guy who's alone as well will cling to you the whole night.

8\. If a creep hits on a female friend of yours in a club it's totally acceptably to be her boyfriend for the night. Same for male friends of course. 

9\. Stop writing lists, it's stupid. 

10.

 

Six months later the final point was still missing and the edges of the sheet started yellowing, but it remained on Robb's fridge, Sansa's souvenir magnet from Rome keeping it in place. At least he'd learned nine things.  
He sat on the counter top in the kitchen an waited for Jon. The whole day had been going awfully slow. Uni had been tedious, but hanging around his flat for several hours was worse. He'd cleaned the mess his term-paper marathon had created, went to the shop down the street to buy some groceries and took a shower after.  
Now it was five-to eight and he was failing at fruit ninja when he heard a knock on the door. He jumped off the counter, slipped on the tiled floor and stubbed his little toe on the leg of a chair. 

"Fuck!"

He stumbled to the door and opened it.

"You okay?" Jon grinned.

"Yeah," he stepped aside to let Jon in "Toe versus chair-leg, nevermind."

"Chair won I reckon." he followed Robb to the kitchen. It was a spacious room with a kitchenette on the far side and a dining table with three chairs and a sofa gathering around it.  
Robb opened the fridge "Drink?"

"You only shag blokes you met at least twice?" Jon asked.

Robb froze 'Fuck, the list!' shot trough his head "That's slightly embarrassing."

Jon wheeled out from behind the fridge door "It's a list of...?"

Robb blushed "A list of things I learned in life, it's stupid I know but my sister suggested writing it and I kind of liked the idea, don't know why."

"It's not stupid if it helps."

"Helps with what?" he asked and put two glasses and a bottle of wine on the table 

"Not watching Bridget Jones unless you're properly depressed." Jon laughed as Robb sat down next him. 

"Had to watch it once with my sister, one and a half hours of torture!"

They fell into easy conversation but Robbs expression soon turned serious

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

Robb hesitated and turned his glass between his palms "What happened with, you know,"

"You mean what got me paralysed?"

Robb bit his lip "I didn't mean to be insensitive."

"You're not." Jon smiled "You waited until we met twice."

That made Robb smile as well "But seriously, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"It's alright," they looked at each other "It was in summer three years ago, I was at a pub with some friends having a pint after work. It was still warm so basically everyone was outside on the pavement when two cars crashed on the junction right in front of it and one of them spun into the crowd." his lower lip trembled slightly "Two of my friends and three other people died and...I don't remember anything but they told me later in hospital that I was trapped between the car and the wall so basically everything from about five inches above my hip to my knees was mushed."

He didn't tell Robb how images of the accident and of Pyp and Grenn's faces right before everything had changed forever still haunted his dreams. Or how the confrontation with the guy responsible for the accident had given him a panic attack at court. 'You should remember him when you see him' they'd said, and he did. He'd remembered the driver staring at him, eyes wide with shock and fear, the searing pain and the taste of blood in his mouth.

"Fuck."

"Yeah. It was pretty tough afterwards but Ygritte was with me the whole time, Mr. Mormont let her work part time and everything and he assured me that I could still work for him although the injury was permanent. Is permanent, Robb."

Robb leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss on his lips "I don't care, I only care about you." he whispered. They were kissing again, more passionate now and Jon started to undo the buttons of Robbs shirt and littering his body with kisses, further and further down until Robb heard the fly of his jeans open. 

 

Later he grabbed a black felt tip pen

10\. Don't judge a book by its cover, some books give amazing head

 

 

 

* Not that kind of girl by Lena Dunham. Read it! It's great!


	8. I'm on fire-The Staves

Robb was awoken by sunlight streaming through the skylight of his bedroom. He blinked and turned his head to the side, a lazy smile forming on his lips.  
The white walls of his bedroom reflected the sunlight, bathing the whole room in an almost surreal glow. He let his eyes take in the sight before him, Jon lay on his stomach facing towards him, the bright light made his skin look almost white in stark contrast to the black mass of curls framing his face. Robb let his eyes explore every inch of Jons face, his aristocratic features with eyelashes fanned out on his cheeks beneath straight black brows. Warmth pooled around Robbs heart and he wanted this moment to last forever. He slowly turned over and placed a light kiss on Jons shoulder peeking out from underneath the comforter.

Jon buried his head further in the pillow and groaned unhappily. 

"You awake?" 

Another groan. 

Robb chuckled "I'll make some coffee."  
He got up and went to the kitchen, turning on the coffee machine. The kitchen served as a living room as well, the tiny bedroom and the bathroom where on the otherside of the hallway. He looked out of the window, the clear blue sky promising a beautiful day. The clock on the window-sill read 8:30, it was still early.  
The coffee machine beeped and he grabbed the two steaming mugs and headed back to the bedroom. He found Jon in the exact same position as before. Robb sat down and held a mug right in front of the others face.  
Jon wirnkled his nose and cracked an eye open 

"What time is it?" 

"Eight-thirty." Robb grinned as he watched him sit up. 

"It's still night." 

"It's a lovely morning, look at the light." 

Jon grabbed his legs one by one, bending them so he sat cross legged with his back against the headboard but immediately covered himself with the blanket again "You're an early bird huh?" 

"Kind of." he answered impishly and handed Jon a mug.

"Okay," he said after a beat of silence and another long sip of coffee.

Robb scooted over so he sat right next to Jon, whose head dropped on his shoulder a second later. Robb kissed the top of Jons head. 

"Are we something?" 

Jon looked up and pulled Robbs head down with his free hand to kiss him freely. "Does this answer your question?" 

"Yes."

Robb put his mug on the bedside table before he leaned in to kiss him again, letting his hands roam and explore but when he played with the seam of Jons shirt his hand was suddenly stopped. He pulled back a little to see Jons face who just looked at him with big eyes.

“What is it?” Robb asked gently but instead of an answering Jon just looked back at him as if he was afraid and shook his head ever so slightly and suddenly Robb understood.  
“Let me see you.” he whispered and brushed their lips together again. 

They just looked at each other and Robb could see the vein at Jons neck pulsating steadily when he answered him in a barely audibly voice “Alright.”

Robb wound his arm around Jons waist and helped him to lie down flatly again before he encircled him with both his arms and just held him close for a few heartbeats. Slowly he let his hands wander again and he kissed Jons neck before he started to slide up the soft black fabric of his shirt. Once the garment dropped onto the floor Robb kissed him deeply and relished the feeling of their bare chests touching, nothing separating them just skin against skin. Their hands found each other and he gave a gentle squeeze before he started to move down slowly.  
He let his teeth brush over the sharp edge of Jons collarbone and further down across snow white planes of smooth skin occasionally interrupted by slivers of scar tissue winding scross his body like frozen rivers. Muscles tensing beneath him made him pause momentarily. 

“One word from you and I'll stop.” Robb said quietly.

Jon gazed at him with charcoal eyes truly being a window to the soul “You're just about where,” his jaw twitched “where my sensation ends.”

Robb blinked, dipped his head to place a tender kiss on his skin and Jon sucked in a sharp breath.

“I'm not hurting you am I?” Robb asked with slight worry. 

“No,” he replied quickly “Just unfamiliar.”

Robb went a bit lower but made sure he kept his hold on Jons hand firm to keep their connection steady.

He tenderly slid the waistband of Jons boxers aside to place a soft kiss on the jut of his hipbone and Jon felt shame clench around his heart when he moved towards the other side. Robbs hand gently brushed over the scar that stretched across his hip and came to rest over the dip where a bone had once been. He raised his gaze but Jon looked away.

“Don't be ashamed.” 

“It's ugly.” Jons voice was coarse.

“But you are not.” Robb moved up so they were on eyelevel again “You are so much more than this.” he said and cast a quick glance towards his hip.

It was a brutally heartfelt statement and it left Jon utterly speechless.

“You think?”

“Let's find out.” Robb whispered against his lips.


	9. Fire-Kasabian

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agVpq_XXRmU

They fell into a comfortable routine over the next weeks.  
Robb bumped into Ygritte whilst having a pint with Theon, resulting in a few tables being pushed together and Robb meeting Sam and Gilly and Theon meeting Jon and Ygritte. Theon tried to get off with Ygritte and got turned down as quick as one can say Peppermint.  
Sam told Robb how he'd met Gilly in that pub two years ago. At that time he'd been very shy and very single, so when he saw the brown haired girl with the beautiful smile he'd looked away immediately. Jon had convinced him to at least say hello to her and 18 months later he'd been Sams best man.  
Robb would always remember that night as filled with laughter, good food and Jons warm calloused hand resting on his. Later that night he'd found himself folded in the back seat of Ygrittes old Ford Escort Convertible, the windows slightly fogged and Kasabian playing softly from the poor stereo.  
Outside his apartment building he'd kissed Jon good-bye through the rolled down car window , the rain seeping through his thin jacket. Never had he felt so in love before. 

Robb learned about their ritual of watching The Shining with a box of doughnuts after having sex with the wrong person,

“I knew this was gonna happen 'Gritte.”

“You know nothing!”

and couldn't help laughing when he saw that the Spotify UK Playlist playing in Jons workshop most days was called 'Walking like a badass' *.

“Does this make me a bad person?”

“Fuck off.”

 

Robb had been playing with the thought of asking Jon to meet his family for a while now but he hadn't found the right moment yet.  
His loved his family and he didn't want to keep their relationship from them anymore, but he also knew that meeting the family wasn't exactly the favourite part in relationship for most people.  
A few weeks ago when he'd taken the refurbished chair back to his parents house he'd almost blurted out: Oh and by the way I have a huge crush on the guy who made this thing look less ugly!

Now he was sitting in the workshop, pretending to read a text on his laptop but secretly watching Jon driving nails into the side wall of a wardrobe.

“I want you to meet my family.”

His hand froze mid-air “What?”

“My family, like in parents and brothers and sisters. One of my sisters to be exact.”

Jon dropped the hammer and wheeled over to where Robb was sitting “Do you think this is a good idea?”

“Why not?

Jon bit his lip and furrowed his brow and Robb didn't need any words to understand his anxiety.

“She won't bite, at least not right away,” he added “and she is very important to me.”

“I can't really say no can I.”

“Not really.” Robb grinned.

 

He called Arya half an hour later.

 

*You can really find this playlist on spotify.


	10. Come See Me-The Pretty Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEkGTuhEPe4

“Why didn't you tell me?” Arya sounded truly offended.

“Wanted to wait for the right moment I guess.”

“Ballocks.”

“You didn't tell me about Gendry either, at least not right away.” 

“That's so not the point!” she replied “Have you told Mum and Dad yet?”

“Uh no,” he paused “Jon wasn't exactly thrilled at the prostpect of meeting the family so I thought I'd start with you.”

“So I'm your guinea pig to see how it goes or what?” she laughed. 

“Kind of. I'll bring a bag of carrots for you.”

“Ok, I'm in!”

Robb chuckled “But seriously our family is rather big, you know how they can get, and Jon is rather quiet and um he's in a wheelchair.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah but, you know even if that sounds terribly cheesy, it doesn't matter to me.”

“Love's blind I guess. We all know that since you dated Theon.”

He ignored the remark about Theon “You free on Thursday?”

–  
Robb watched Jons index finger tapping against the mug.

“Nervous?” 

“No.” Jon answerd dryly

Robb smirked “Alright.”

They were at The Crag, a cosy cafe whose owner Jeyne Westerling was an old friend of Robb.  
He had chosen this place because its vintage style furniture and pastel green walls made it wonderfully homely and calm.

“Hey you!” 

Robb and Jon both looked up to see Arya walking towards them. She was wearing black jeans, a coarse-meshed black jumper and a big smile on her face when she hugged her brother.

"Arya Jon, Jon Arya." Robb said after they'd separated.

"Hi."

"Hi, how's it going?"

Conversation was a bit bumpy in the begining, but the longer they were talking the easier it got.  
Arya pestered Jon with questions and Jon being Jon answered with plain honesty.  
The longer Robb watched the two talk the more he noticed how similar they looked, both had dark hair and eyes, a somber face and a dirty mouth.  
Jon had been annoying fidgety the whole morning, so seeing him and Arya get along so well made him feel relieved.  
When he excused himself to go to the toilet Arya leaned over the table and put on a serious face

"Do you like my brother?"

"Yes."

"Good, because he needs someone good. He's shagged too many stupid, meaningless blokes over the years. Don't hurt him."

"I'll give my best."

"You better. I'm in a fencing club you know, just in case you fail."

"Fencing? Sticking 'em with the pointy end aye?"

Arya leaned back and a smile spread over her face "I think I like you."


	11. The A Team-Ed Sheeran

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found this one along Chapter 39 in an old folder, I thought I had deleted it by accident.  
> Actually I tried writing a replacement for it a couple of times but I was never happy with it so I just left it and I was just so happy that I found it again!!  
> So here's the smut some of you might have been waiting for ;)  
> Enjoy!

“I'm glad you an Arya get along.” Robb mumbled against Jons shoulder and lightly carresed his collarbone.

 

“Yeah, she's cool.”

 

Robb smiled and moved to kiss him, deep and loving, passionate and his body grew hot with want. He let his hands wander when suddenly

 

“Don't, don't touch please,just...” Jons hand where on his shoulders and pushed him away, gently but with determination “Sorry.”

 

“I thought we were over it,” Robb took in his big, soulful eyes and sat up with a sigh“Do you think we should perhaps talk about this?”

 

“No,” he answered quickly and bit his lip “but it's better if we do.”

 

Silence stretched between them

 

“Okay I'll start,” Robb said suddenly and sat back on his heels “I want you. And I know that you don't like it when I touch you where you can't feel but it's so fucking hard not to. I love your fingers and your very, very talented tongue but..”

 

“It's not enough, I know.” Jon added with a nod. He had seen this conversation coming but that didn't make it any less awkward. “I think you already gathered that I can't get hard or come, at least not physically like you do, mainly because I don't feel stimulation or whatever. Doctors and all them say that it's all in the head and that's true.” he paused with a long exhale but pushed himself to carry on “I'm just unsure because, it like dead meat from my ribs down but you know, sometimes you touch my leg and it spasms, sometimes not, I don't what will happen and I just don't want it to be weird for you without proper physical response.”

 

“It's not just meat, it's you.” Robb looked at him intensely and moved closer to take Jons hand “And speaking of response, what about the the ticklish spot?”

 

A spot on the inside of his right knee, about the size of a five pound note which would usually just set of spasms when fabric brushed over it but when it had been Robbs tongue it had felt like heaven come down to earth “I'm incomplete thats why, when you have complete SCI you level of injury is literally a dead end but I've got a few spots where I have sensation, but that pretty much it.”

 

“A few? Plural?” an idea sparked inside his mind.

 

“Yeah.” Jon shrugged.

 

A mischieveous grin spread on Robbs face “That my love,” he leaned forward to plant a kiss on Jons lips “is something I can work with.

 

“How do you mean?”

 

“Perhaps you've got sensation at spots you're not even aware of.” he answered suggestively.

 

“Robb listen,” he interrupted him “you don't have to do this. To be honest for me its more about what you feel rather than...” he was cut off by Robb who closed the distance between them and kissed his neck sensually.

 

“Then let me feel you,” his breath ghosted over Jons exposed skin and he gently pushed him to lie down on his back. He kissed the crook of Jons neck and felt his calloused hands run up and down his back “Let me feel your sweet,” Robb moved down and licked over a nipple, causing a shuddering breath to fall from his lips “warm,” he licked it again, gently scraped his front teeth over the sensitive flesh before sliding further down “tight,” he kissed the flat plane of his stomach, right where he knew Jons sensation ended while he let his hands slide up and down his sides and he felt a hand knotting in his hair and the sweet sounds of Jons arousal filled his ears “perfectness.”

 

That was all it took for Jon to pull him upwards again and crash their lips together with so much passion that Robbs head swam. Jons hand wandered down his back and squeezed hard which caused Robb to moan into his mouth and grind his hardness against him.

 

“I want you so bad.” he rasped against Jons neck.

 

“Alright.”

 

“Alright?”

 

“Yeah. I mean what can go wrong.”

 

Robb took his sweet time preparing him but never stopped caressing Jons sweet spots with is free hand and tongue, this was too important to mess up. Eventually he had to stop though to reach for a condom but then he was ready and looked at Jon

 

“Alright?”

 

“Honestly you have to stop asking me that!” Jon replied with a grin and pulled him in for a kiss “I want this as much as you do.”

 

Robb chuckled and nodded before he slowly eased eased in the first few inches, he had waited for this so long and god help him, it had been worth the wait.

Then he looked at him and the unspoken question mirrored clearly on his face.

 

“No.” Jon said almost apologeticaly but before he could say anything else Robb had silenced him with a kiss. Although he struggled to hold himself back he continued his achingly slow pace but again, this was too important to be messed up, although he had been more than right about one thing.

 

“You feel amazing.” Robbs voice was low and husky and almost immediately their lips collided again, teeth clinking together in passion and Robb moved the final inch.

 

“Holy fucking christ!”

 

“What, what is it?” Robb asked with worriedly but upon seeing Jons face he began to understand “No...did you...?”

 

“Yeah!”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah.” Jons voice shook with emotion and he locked eyes with Robb “I feel you.”

Robb felt like his breath had been taken away but he smiled, tentatively at first but then he was all teeth and dimples and he kissed Jon again before burying his head in the crook of his neck. 

Fingers carded through his hair and then tucked at it and Jons mouth was next to his ear "Fucking move." And he did, god help him he did.

Needless to say, neither of them lasted long.

They lay face to face afterwards, Robbs hand was in Jons hair and a smile tucked at his lips.

 

“It feels like a miracle.” he admitted.

 

“It's sience,” Jon answered with a dry smirk “just depends on which nerves are still intact.”

 

“Still.”

 

“A bit perhaps.” he buried his head further in the pillow and closed one eye.

 

“What did you feel?” Robb asked and brushed back a stray curl. Jon took his time with answering and he waited patiently.

 

“I don't really know, like, it was familiar but I can't pinpoint what it was, does that make sense?” Robb hummed in agreement “But it was amazing.”

 

“I agree.” although slightly hesitant Robb asked “Where you top or bottom before the accident?”

 

“So so. Depended on who I was with.”

 

“What would it have been with me?” it was almost sheepish but curiosity got the best of him.

 

“I would have fuckin' crouched for you.”

 

 

 

 

 


	12. Renegades-X Ambassadors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8j741TUIET0

When Robb was done with uni the next day he called Jon.

“Hey, you at home?”

“Working, why?”

“I'll go grab some dinner, you go grab a shower and we'll meet in half an hour on your couch okay?”

He could practically hear Jon smile “You save my day.”

 

Half an hour later he knocked on the heavy wooden door that separated Jon and Ygrittes flat from the backyard of their shop. When Jon opened it Robb bent down to kiss him and hand him a pizza box. Inside it was warm and smelling of wood and beeswax, X Ambassadors playing softly from the stereo. 

“Your room or couch?” he asked while Jon was in the kitchen to fetch a knife. 

“Ygritte's gone out so the couch is all ours.” Jon replied and he could almost hear the other grinning behind his back.  
Robb loved the old couch, the feeling of the worn leather and the large collection of throw pillows Ygritte had added made it the perfect place to relax.  
When Jon came back from the kitchen Robb had already gotten himself comfortable , legs curled beneath him.  
He smiled lazily at his boyfriend but his smile was replaced by a slightly concerned look when Jon transferred onto the couch with a slight wince and a furrowed brow. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” he adjusted his position “back's been annoying me the whole day. It's nothing.” he added with a slight smile when Robb shot him another look. Robb could feel that something was going on behind that innocent smile but he decided not to ask.

They shared the pizza chatting about their days and ended up cuddled together and watching Breaking Bad reruns, Jon lying between Robbs legs with his head on the others shoulder.  
Robbs nose was buried in his boyfriends hair with his hands hands resting on his hips. 

“You have an eyelash.”

“What?” Jon blinked up at him.

“On your cheek.” he picked up the tiny black hair with his index finger “Make a wish.”

Jon hesitated for a moment, eyes fixed on Robbs hand resting on his hip.

“I wish I could feel your hand.” his voice was barely above a whisper “Or your hip against mine.”

Robb looked worried and moved so he sat next to him and took Jons hands, kissing his knuckles. Jon raised his eyes and Robb felt like he was staring into two black holes.  
He leaned forward and connected their lips in a tender kiss, his hands burying in his Jons hair.  
They stayed like this for several moments until Robb felt something wet on his cheeks and tasted salt.  
He wiped Jons tears away with his thumb.

“Sorry.”

“Don't.”

They both fell silent again. Robb put an arm around Jons shoulders and placed another kiss on his temple “What is it?” he whispered, their faces still close.

“It's just...” Jon paused, his brow furrowed “Why can I still feel the pain but not...not you, it just doesn't make any fucking sense.” he cast his eyes down once again.

Robb knew that Jon often experienced phantom pain in his lower back where he'd been injured, and that it could get pretty bad sometimes.  
He hated seeing him like this, shoulders tense and lips in a tight line. All he wanted was to make it better somehow but he knew nothing in the world could fix crushed nerves. 

“Bed?” 

“Yeah.” Jon answered tiredly and tried to turn to the side only for another spike of pain to erupt in his lower back, a low moan escaping his lips.

“Let me help.” Robb couldn't stand it anymore.

To his surprise Jon looked at him and gave a slight nod. Under normal circumstances he would have protested or at least rolled his eyes but Robb could see that he was too tired and in too much pain to do either of it now.  
Robb got up from the couch and hoisted him up in his arms carefully, Jons breath shuddering against his throat as he carried him to his bedroom.  
Robb put him down gently on the bed and kissed him deeply “I'll be back in a sec.”  
He returned to the living room, turned off the TV and the lights and took Jons wheelchair back to the bedroom.  
He found Jon on his side of the bed, facing away from the door. Robb quickly discarded his clothes and slipped under the covers, sneaking an arm around Jons now unclad waist.

“You're heavier than you look.”

Jon let out a quiet laugh and turned in Robbs arms to look at him “I love you.” 

It was the first time in a relationship for Robb that someone had said the three magical words to him. He used to think that saying those words was something special, that they were like a barrier between him and something more meaningful, and that he would take his time returning them.  
In that moment he realized that all the thoughts he had spent on saying 'I Love you' were wasted.  
When he looked into Jons eyes nothing else mattered, and that was the only thing that mattered.

“I love you too.”

Jon kissed him again before burying his nose in the curve of Robbs neck.


	13. Unsteady-X Ambassadors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0lw3qylVfY

Sleep didn't come easy that night.  
The room was pitch black and the only sound breaking the silence was their breathing. Robb started stroking Jons back in gentle circles when he felt the other mans body tensing and he could feel his stomach sink a little everytime his fingertips brushed over the slivers of scar tissue littering Jons skin. He knew Jon still wasn't fully comfortable with being touched where he couldn't feel but that didn't seem to matter in that moment. Soon the other mans breathing evened out and Robb was left alone with his thoughts. He heard a few cars drive by, a faraway siren and Ygritte returning home sometime later. The scratching of keys against the lock, heels clicking on wooden floorboards and the creaking of her bedroom door. Then there was only silence again.  
When the alarm went off he felt like he hadn't slept at all. He managed to turn off the alarm clock without throwing it across the room and let his head drop back on the pillow.  
Five minutes later it went off again, this time waking them both.  
He watched Jon get up, his movements still a little stiff and more careful than usual. It was Saturday and Robb wanted nothing else than go back to sleep but Ygritte and Jon worked the Saturdays and he could still go back to bed at home. 

He got dressed and went to the kitchen, watching Ygritte unlock the back door of the shop on the other side of the backyard. It was snowing lightly outside, the yard was covered in brown and grey patches of dirty snow and puddles of watery mud. It was early March, soon the snow would be replaced by rain and the sun rousing the world up from its winter sleep.

“You alright?” he asked over coffee some time later.

“Sure.”

Robb huffed.

“What?” 

“I can see you're not.”

“So?” Jon shot him a look.

“Just tell me what's going on or whatever.” he started to become annoyed.

“You know what's going on.”

“Yeah but why don't you just talk to me.”

“Maybe because I don't want to?” 

“How am I supposed to know what's wrong if you don't say anything?”

Jon ran a hand through his hair “Robb you fucking know what's wrong with me.”

“I never said there was anything wrong with you,” he emphazised the last word “I only want to know what's going on in your head.”  
“None of your business.” Jon spat.

“Maybe it is my business.” Robb felt anger bubble up inside him.

Jon snorted “And that's yours to decide yeah?”

“No.” he put his mug down forcefully “But in a relationship you share.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that if you would talk to me things would be easier!”

“Not everyone is like you, some people can actually keep shit to themselves!”

"Sometimes I think you don't want to understand me!" he got up, the legs of the chair screeching against the kitchen floor "Why are you making this so hard?"

"Not everyone can match your fucking picture perfect world maybe someone should've told you that!"

Jons voice was dripping with venom and Robb knew if he was going to stay he would say something he didn't mean. They stared at each other for a moment before Robb turned on his heel, grabbed his jacket from the sofa and forcefully closed the front door behind him.


	14. La Fee Verte-Kasabian

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1_7kpjHwdE

It was Wednesday and Robb hated Wednesdays.  
Lectures didn't finish until six in the evening and it was still snowing, but not the nice kind of snow that crunched under your feet and covered everything in a shiny white. It wasn't cold enough anymore so the snowflakes were thick and wet and the streets soon became a grey and muddy mess. The sky was dull and overcast and perfectly matching his mood. Fucking irony that was.  
He hadn't heard of Jon since Saturday.  
In hindsight he realized that their argument had been truly stupid. He'd been pushy and Jon had been touchy but he would not be the one to call first.  
He went to Jeynes cafe in his lunch break to get some proper coffee, not like the brown tasteless stuff from the vending machine at uni. 

“Hey grumpy, what's wrong?” she asked as she put the cup on the counter.

“Weather's shitty.”

“Yeah,” she nodded “How's it going with Jon?”

Robb traced the rim of the cup with his index finger and shrugged.

“The weather yeah?” she smiled knowingly “You been fighting?”

“Yeah. I mean no, not really. It wasn't like a proper fight, more like a stupid argument over nothing.”

“And nothing got you sulking like that?”

“Jon saying nothing, that's what. Sometimes it's really getting on my nerves that he's so quiet and we both weren't in the best mood that morning. Bloody textbook.”

“Did you call him yet?”

“No, radio silence. Literally. And I won't call first!”

“Good boy.”

He'd left The Crag feeling a little better, but afternoon lectures were tedious and his mood was down to zero in no time.  
He'd decided to take bus that morning but regretted that decision in the evening when the bus stop was overcrowded and he was forced to stand on the pavement next to it. The snow melted on his jacket, slowly seeping through it and every time a car drove past dirty water splashed over his boots.  
When Robb entered his apartment building later he felt wet and miserable and the mirror in the elevator showed him that he didn't look any better than he felt.  
He dropped they keys twice before he managed to unlock his door. When he entered he almost dropped them again.  
His apartment was bathed in an almost golden light, candles of different sizes were on the floor in the hallway casting dancing shadows on the walls. Robb just stood there for a moment, taking in the sight before him when his bedroom door opened.  
Jon looked at him, standing there in the hallway with his clothes dripping wet and the warm light making Robbs red hair glow like fire. 

“Hi.” he sounded almost shy.

Robb looked around once more before his gaze settled on Jon looking up at him “Wow.” he breathed.

“You like it?”

“It's gorgeous.” he answered taking off his scarf and coat.

Jon nodded and bit his lip “I'm really sorry for Saturday. I was an idiot.”

“Yes you were. But I wasn't exactly tactful either.” He bent down and kissed Jon gently “By the way, it's smelling great in here.”

“Hungry?”

“Always.”

Turned out that a pot of tomato soup was waiting for him in the kitchen along with some more candles. 

“How did you get in here?” he asked after finishing the soup.

“Theon has your spare key.” Jon answered impishly “Wanted to do it properly I guess.”

Robb reached over and intertwined their hands “There's something I want to do properly. “

“Yes?”

“I know that's easier said than done, but if something's bothering you please tell me. Or text me. Or send a raven I don't care but this is important for me. Don't build up a wall around you, let me in.”

“I'll try.” he answered sombrely “I've wasted so much time on talking to people that didn't matter, because I had to. But you are important to me, more than anyone else.”

Robb was lost for words. He felt like his mind had escaped his body and he was watching himself from under the ceiling. His heart was singing and there weren't any words that could describe what he was feeling.  
Jon had opened up in that moment, he had let his walls come down and Robb could see the effort behind it.  
Never had he felt so loved before. 

“I love you.”


	15. Tonight-Reamonn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtoncUzV6nA

March turned into April, the days became longer, the trees broke into leaf and everything seemed to feel genuinely better.  
The songs of the birds in the trees and hedges chased the cold, winterly feelings away and Robb found himself walking around grinning like an idiot. The sun warmed his back when he cycled home from uni and when he dropped by on Jons workshop he often found the backdoors open to let the sunshine in. The only thing that slightly dampened his mood was that he he spent his free time mostly alone. Jon and Ygritte seemed to work far more than usual so if they found the time to see each other it was mostly in the evening after a long day. When Robb asked why they worked so much he answered evasively and Robb sensed something was going on. When his phone buzzed in class a few days later, signalling a text from Jon with an invitation for lunch. He started to grow suspicious but agreed.  
Jon waited for him outside the building, a smile on his face and aviators in his hair. It was a bright day, the sky was clear and Robb couldn't help but notice how handsome he looked. 

"Now that's happy face." Robb said and slung his messenger bag over his shoulder.

"Glad to see you that's all." Jon reached out and took his hand, pulling him down to kiss him.

They went to a small restaurant off campus and after they'd ordered Robb leaned forward and put his elbows on the table.

"Why are we here?"

"What do you mean?"

"Look, I haven't seen you for almost a week because you had so much work and suddenly you're free over lunch?"

"Yeah," Jon chuckled "I wanted to tell you why we've been working so much."

Robb raised an eyebrow "And what's that?"

"It's something Ygritte and I have been thinking about for quite some time. You remember the sketches on her desk?"

He nodded.

"Well she's really good at designing furniture and I built some of her creations for her. We put them in the shop, not for sale, just as decoration but a lot of people asked if they could buy them. Long story short we decided to actually start selling them, under our own names. That's why we were so busy over the last weeks."

"Wow that's great, it's a great idea."

"I'm not so sure yet if it's a great or a terribly stupid idea." he scratched the back of his head.

"It's not. You're both really talented and I mean even if it fails you still got the shop." Robb reached over the table and intertwined their hands "I got a bofriend to be proud of I reckon.

"Stop it now yeah." Jon laughed and playfully swatted his hand away "But there is something else. We'll do kind of a launch party for our label in the shop, the furniture is going to be displayed and stuff. You're invited of course but um, do you wanna be my official date like as in a proper couple?"

Robb watched him blush slightly and knot his fingers together.

"Yes."

 

 

 


	16. Something In The Water-Brooke Fraser

The weeks leading to the launch party were still busy and therefore Robb and Jon still didn't see each other a lot but Robb often went to the shop after uni or during his break so they could spent at least some time together.  
They spent the night before the launch together, eating takeout, watching Netflix and making love.  
It was a much needed time together and until that night neither of them had realised how much of a strain not seeing each other on a regular basis had put on their relationship.  
The next morning was full of bustling activity, Robb helped Jon and Ygritte with making the last arrangements in the shop before guests would arrive.

“If anyone follows the invitation.” as Ygritte put it. 

When everything had been set up they all headed back to flat to take showers and get dressed.  
Robb was finished first and went to the kitchen to make coffee.  
He hadn't slept much and the busy morning had worn him out a bit so now he was glad to get to enjoy some caffeine and quiet. He could hear the shower running and Ygritte whistling along to a song on the radio when he put his elbows on the counter that faced the window and took a sip of his coffee.  
He let his thoughts drift while he watched a few sparrows chasing each other in the backyard and therefore didn't hear someone entering the kitchen.

“Those pants make your ass look great.”

He jumped and whirled around.

“I almost spilled my coffee because of you idiot.” he laughed and playfully smacked Jons face “Want one too?”

“Always.”

While the coffee was brewing Robb watched him refill the sugar bowl, silently marveling at the sight of Jon wearing a plum coloured button down shirt that hugged his upper body in all the right places  
His gaze must have lingered a little bit too long because a moment later Jon put down the sugar and shot him an inquiring look.

“What?”

“You look handsome that's all.” he answered sheepishly.

“Uh,” Jon blushed “Thanks?”

Robb chuckled and shook his head “Your really can't take compliments can you?”

“But I can do this.” he grabbed Robbs hip and pulled him on his lap, pressing their lips together.  
Robb wound a hand around Jons neck and grabbed a fistful of hair, causing him to moan into Robbs mouth. 

“Sorry that I have to interrupt ya lovebirds but we should get going!” Ygritte knocked on the table with her knuckles, grinning when they broke apart abruptly and Jon shot her an annoyed look.  
In fact almost everyone they had invited turned up and soon the workshop was crowded with people and filled with chatter.  
Robb watched Jon and Ygritte say a few words, her forest green dress perfectly matching Jons shirt and he couldn't help but notice what a beautiful couple they would have made in another world.  
Hands were shaken and business cards exchanged and Jon tapped his side and grinned from one ear to another when he saw Ygritte flirting with a man.  
When the room had emptied in the evening Ygritte, Jon and Robb sat together in the shop, top-buttons undone and Ygritte barefoot, each a beer in hand. 

“To you two crazy people.” Robb said smiling and the bottles clinked together.


	17. I Never Came-Queens Of The Stone Age

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eIiu1CjrTE

The launch had been a success, but that didn't make things easier for Robb and Jon.  
Jon was still busy most of the time and uni was taking up most of Robbs free time. More often than not they saw each other only for a few nights a week.

“You're seeing Theon a lot.” Jon remarked one evening over dinner.

“So?”

“Nothing.”

Robb raised an eyebrow but decided not to press the matter.  
Later in bed he lay on his stomach with his arm draped over Jon chest.

“Jon?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you want to have children?”

Jon turned his head on the pillow to look at him “Sorry?”

“Like, in the future.”

“Robb, it's late.” he whined.

“Do you?”

Jon huffed “Don't know, not really.”

Robb propped his head up on his hand and studied his face “Why not?”

“Let's see. Orphan, gay, paraplegic. Not exactly parent material. Why are you looking at me like I killed your cat now?” he added with slight annoyance when Robb pursed his lips.

“Alright touchy I'll leave it.”

“Let's just get some sleep yeah?”

They fell asleep with their backs turned towards each other that night.

A few hours later, in the very middle of the night, Robbs phone rang.

“Hello?” he said, his voice scratchy from sleep

For a moment he didn't hear anything but heavy breathing on the other end and was just about to hang up again when he heard something that sounded like a sob.  
He looked on the phone screen to find out whose number it was.

“Theon? Whats wrong?”

“M'Dad Robb...my Da's dead...” Theon slurred.

“What?” Robb was instantly awake “What happened? Where are you?”

“ 'm home...”

“Hold on, I'm coming.”

He ended the call and put the lights on, then bent over to tenderly shake Jons shoulder.

“Jon?”

“What?”

“Theon called,” he paused for a moment until Jon was awake “I have to go see him.”

“Why?”

“His father died.”

“Do whatever you want.” he grumbled and threw an arm over his eyes.

Robb got dressed quickly, turning off the lights again and leaving the flat as quietly as he could.  
He reached Theons house about ten minutes later. He chained his bike to the rusty garden fence and went across the dry lawn of the front garden. His hand hovered over the doorknob for a second before turning it to open the door.  
He found Theon in the living room, curled in a foetal position on the floor in front of the couch, and quickly crouched down next to him.

“Hey, you alright?”

Theon blinked up at him with clouded eyes “What'cha think.”

“I think you look fucked.” he deadpanned and offered the other man a hand to help him onto the couch.  
Once Theon was settled he went to the kitchen to get a pint of water and a bucket, just to be sure, and returned to the living room. It wasn't the first time he was doing this and it still felt uncomfortably familiar.  
Theon took the glass with shaking hands and pulled his legs towards his chest.

“I...I only wanted t'pick somthin' up from his place,” he said after a beat of silence “Found 'im on the floor in the kitchen...fuck, Robb he's gone.”

Robb put an arm around his shoulders when Theon let his head drop on his chest.

“I'm sorry mate.”

“Don't be, 's not like the fucker didn't deserve it.” he said, his words muffled against Robbs shirt “Still hurts though, I dunno.”

They stayed like this the whole night, just talking, taking their minds off things until the sun was on the rise.  
When it reached midday they had fallen asleep on each others shoulders.

"Don't your other half mind you stayin' here?" Theon asked later that day, nursing a cup of coffee.

Robb shrugged nonchalantly.

"Trouble in paradise?"

" 's not like we would've seen each other anyway."

"Biterness doesn't suit your pretty face my friend."


	18. Diary of Jane(Acoustic)-Breaking Benjamin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEVj6ZDgCIo

“You've got some nerve to turn up here.”

“Sorry?” Robb asked puzzled.

Jon put his book down on the kitchen table and looked him straight in the eye “You run off in the middle of the night, disappearing for three days and now you act it's like nothing.”

He ran a hand through his hair “Theon needed me.”

“You could've at least answered your phone!”

Robb exhaled audibly and shrugged “He's my best friend and his father just fucking died, I had to be there for him!”

“You were the one persisting on communication, not me!” Jon shot back. 

“So it's my fault?”

“Yeah, it is your fault that you didn't call! I was worried, alright.”

“About me or abour me being with Theon the whole time?” he snapped. 

Jon snorted “You think I'm jealous?”

„Sometimes I think your broken back isn't the only thing crippling you.”

The very second Robb uttered those words he hated himself for it. 

Jon was at loss for words, a look of bewilderment and disbelief crossing his features.

“Jon, I didn't mean it, it came out wrong...”

“Get out.” he cut him off in a low, menacing voice.

Robb opened his mouth to say something but remained silent, unsure what to do.

“I...,”

“Get the fuck out of here!” Jon boomed, his nostrils quivered and he gripped the hand rims of his wheelchair so tight his knuckles turned white.

Robb recoiled at Jons outburst, shoulders trembling and a sting at the back of his eyes.  
He took a few steps backwards and then all but fled the apartment, tears burning in his eyes when he shut the front door behind him.  
Once outside he leaned against the cool brick wall of the worskshop across the yard and clasped his hand over his mouth to muffle a sob. He screwed his eyes shut, thick tears dripping onto the back of his hand. His shoulders trembled with each stifled cry, his whole body shivering from the onslaught of pure emotion. When he opened his eyes again the world was blurry but as his vision cleared he saw the light in the kitchen window, the very kitchen he had been in merely a few moments ago, and he could make out Jons silhouette.  
Seeing his lover was still right were he left him but bent over with his head buried in his hands made Robb feel like his breath had been knocked out of him.  
He tore his gaze away from the window, eyes fixed on the sky, gritting his teeth and thumping the back of his head against the wall behind him.  
He had fucked up.  
The clicking of heels on concrete made him jump.  
Ygritte rounded the corner, a few Sainsbury's bags in one hand and fumbling for her keys with the other. 

“Robb?”

He didn't answer.

Ygritte watched him hurry away without a word, looking after him in bafflement.  
When he disappeared around the corner of the yard she shook her head,still wondering what was going on, and unlocked the front door. She put down the bags in the hallway and stepped out of her boots but when she heard a muffled sniff from inside the flat she stopped undoing the buttons of her peacoat and went inside.

“Jon?”

“Kitchen.” 

His voice was thick and when she entered the kitchen her expression turned from confused to worried upon seeing his reddened cheeks and eyes shining with tears.  
Ygritte closed the distance between them and crouched down in front of him so she could look him in the eye.

“What happened?” she asked quietly “Are you alright?”

Jon took a moment to collect himself “No.”

They settled on the couch together and Ygritte tucked the big black and copper coloured woolen blanket Gilly had made for them last winter firmly around their shoulders. 

“I saw Robb in the yard earlier.” she said after they had sat in silence for a few minutes.

Jon nodded and absently tugged the fringes of the blanket “I kicked him out.”

“Why, what did he do?” 

“We had an argument because of Theon.” he answered quietly.

“This stupid friend of his?”

“Yeah. Robb,” he paused, a lump forming in his throat at the thought of Robb “He said that...”

Jon trailed off. He dropped his gaze and tugged at the fringes again, trying to distract himself from the prickling of tears in his eyes. 

“He said what?” she asked softly, reaching out to still his hands and put a gentle hand on his chin so she could look into his eyes again. 

“He said that my broken back isn't the only thing crippling me.” he answered finally, his voice trembling and the muscles in his neck tensing.  
She watched a single tear drop from his eyes, so full of pain and grief that she instinctively leaned forward and put her arms tightly around his shoulders.

“I'll skin him.” she whispered into his ear.

“Thanks,” he huffed out a chuckle and pulled back to look at her “but I'd prefer to it myself.”

Ygritte pouted jokingly and tugged a strand of hair that had come loose from his bun “Spoilsport.”


	19. Castle Of Glass-Linkin Park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScNNfyq3d_w

Robbs thumb hovered over his phone.  
The screen was illuminated and below a row of black digits Jon grinned up at him with messy hair and one eye closed against the sun.  
He had taken that picture one lazy morning about a month ago when it had been uncharacteristically warm for April and so they'd decided to have breakfast on the little balcony of Robbs flat. Robb had put his feet up on the railing and caught himself staring over at Jon who'd sat next to him with his eyes closed and his head resting against the wall behind him.  
He'd opened one eye to glance at Robb in the exact moment the latter took the photo.  
Remembering that morning made Robbs stomach clench.  
The week had been depressing enough, he'd helped Theon making arrangements for the funeral and amidst all this sadness he'd started to miss Jon even more. His mother had called a few days back and asked how things were going and he'd lied to her and said everything was fine, not feeling ready to tell anyone what had happened. Ned and Catelyn knew that he was seeing someone, Arya hadn't quite managed to keep her mouth shut most likely, but they didn't know who it was.  
Robbs thumb still hovered over the call button but he couldn't bring up the courage to tap on it.  
He wanted to talk to Jon, he wanted to apologise, to tell him that he had not meant what he'd said and that he loved him but at the same time he was scared.  
Scared of what Jon might say to him.  
Robb understood that what he'd said that evening ten days ago had hit Jons sore spot like a punch in the gut and he would do everything to take it back.  
Everything.  
The days he had spent with Theon had been desolate and tiring and all he'd wanted after was to kiss the man he loved, to hold him close and feel alive after being surrounded by death and mourning. In hindsight he realised that going off the radar for three whole days after leaving in the middle of the night hadn't been his smoothest move.  
With that adding up to the tension between him and Jon he understood now that an argument had been almost unpreventable, it had to happen sooner or later.  
A verbal hit below the literal waistline however could have been prevented if his mouth hadn't overran his brain.  
At the same time he was utterly at loss what to do if he couldn't even work up the courage for a phone call.  
Cursing under his breath he ran a hand through his hair and tapped the call button. 

-

 

-...Spread it like peanut butter jelly...-

“Fuck off.” Jon muttered under his breath and swiped down the lock bar to silence his phone.  
He'd set that bloody song as Robbs ringtone after he'd found him dancing to it in the kitchen whilst cooking dinner one evening.  
He shook his head, trying to force the memory away but the picture of Robb standing in the middle of the kitchen with a wooden spoon in hand and a blush creeping up on his cheeks wouldn't leave his head.  
Jon tried to focuse back on his work and to distract himself from thinking about Robb but failed miserably.  
A week and a half had passed since the fight and neiher of them had tried to make contact since.  
They'd been fighting over bloody Theon, the topic couldn't have been more textbook and in the aftermath Jon felt guitly that he'd started it.  
He had made a mistake, yes, but Robb had crossed a line that night. His words had not only hurt Jons pride but touched something else, something hidden deep inside him that he'd tried to keep tucked away firmly since the day they'd met.  
Shyness and insecurity had been his steady companions over the last three years but since he'd met Robb he tried to keep those feelings at bay.  
He hadn't exactly been what one would call shy before the accident, his looks and a certain amount of self-confidence had made sure of that.  
Time had brought back some of it, at least enough for him to go out and meet people again.  
Then came Robb, that babbling, blushing mess of a beautiful boy standing in his workshop one day.  
Robb who had something about him that made him feel at ease.  
Jon had never considered having a relationship again, not only for physical aspects but because of things beyond his understanding like phantom pains or spasming legs in the morning.  
Things Robb had noticed and accepted, but never raised a question about.  
Jon hadn't confided them to anyone apart from Ygritte until then since not understanding his own body was painful enough most days.  
Robb had chased the bitter thoughts away with his bright smiles and adorable accent and if anyone had told him a year ago that he would kiss someone on the first date again he would have laughed.  
Now it felt like the sun had disappeared and left nothing behind but rain and ashes. Jons anger had kept him from actually missing Robb for the first few days, but when he'd woken up in the morning a week after he'd realised that it could be over, and it hit him hard.  
The cold pillow next to him still smelled of Robbs deodorant and musk and soon it had been soaked in bitter tears of loneliness and hurt.  
Still, as much as he missed Robb he didn't want to see him again.  
At least not now.  
Jon was well aware of what was crippling him, waking up every morning with no sensation in his lower half made it hard not to, but Robb spitting that word in his face had cut deep.


	20. Howling For You-The Black Keys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VF6-J5BCxWM

“Idiot!” Arya exclaimed and smacked Robbs head.

“Ow!”

“You deserve it, how could you be so stupid!” 

“I didn't come here for a scolding.”

“No but clearly needed one.” when Arya saw the sad look on his face she sat down next to him and bumped their shoulders together “But I'm finished now.”

He chuckled and cocked his head “Lucky me.”

“So you and Jon ain't talking?” she asked, her face turning serious.

“No.” he answered quietly “He doesn't answer my calls.”

“Just go see him then.”

Robbs eyebrows shot up “If he doesn't even asnwer my calls he certainly doesn't want to see me.”

“Come on don't be such a dork!” she rolled her eyes dramatically “This not talking thing you two are doing needs to be resolved and someone has to take the first step. You fucked up, you take the first step. If he wants to see you or not doesn't matter, just try.”

Robb was dumbfounded “How come my little sister knows more about relationships than me.”

“I'm wise.” she grinned “And now get going, come on!”  
-

Fifteen minutes later Robb took a deep breath and knocked on the front door.  
The moments that passed before it opened felt like an eternity, but when it finally did and he looked into Jons face time seemed to stop.

“What do you want?” Jon asked curtly.

“I wanted to talk to you.”

His face remained stoic “Go on then.”

Robb shifted his weight from one foot to another “Can I at least come in?”

Jon fixed him for a moment longer before moving aside to let him pass. It felt strange to be in the flat again and Robb didn't know what to do with himself before he decided to sit down on the sofa to be on eyelevel with Jon. 

“So?”

Robb bit his lip and met Jons eyes, shrinking back internally at the cold look Jon was giving him “I wanted to say sorry.”

“You've said it.”

“Jon please.”

“Please what, what did you expect? A hug and a tissue box?” he said sarcastically.

“I can't do more than to tell you how sorry I am for what I've said.”Robb shook his head and tried deperately to bite back the tears “And that I miss you.”

Jons lip twitched. He could see the sadness in Robbs eyes and it made his heart ache “Robb...”

He blinked, felt the wetness in his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek to keep himself from crying “And that I love you.” 

Jon watched him, how his lips pressed together tightly and fingers knotted in his lap, and although his brain told him that he wasn't ready yet to forgive him he felt his anger subside. He wanted to reach out to him, to hold him and cherish him but instead he grabbed them hem of Robbs shirt and kissed him fiercely.  
Robb squealed in surprise but when the first seconds of shock had passed he wound his hand around Jons neck and opened his lips, their teeth colliding in passion.  
His whole body started tingling and his mind went blank, nothing else mattered apart from Jons hands roaming his body and his tongue sliding over his lower lip.  
He had missed Jon with his heart and his body, soon his jeans started to get uncomfortably tight and he felt like someone had switched his brain off.  
When his brain started functioning again he found himself lying next to Jon on the soft rug in front of the sofa, both naked as on their name day.  
Silence stretched on between them and when the afterglow was beginning to subside the thinking started. 

“Jon...?”

“Shut up!”


	21. Through Glass-Stone Sour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_y-6z02rY8

The walk of shame, that's what they call it when you walk home form a one night stand isn't it? Not that Robb would feel ashamed of what had happened that afternoon on the floor in Jons living room, it only confused him.  
They hadn't talked after. He had tried to pick up conversation only to be shut up and then he'd realised that he wouldn't have known what to say.  
They had both collected their clothes in silence and Robb had left when Jon was in the shower.  
Just like Theon would.  
He didn't know if Jon had felt as lonely as him after he'd left but in the aftermath Robb had felt relieved.  
Everything had been said. He didn't know yet were their relationship was heading, but no matter if they would break up or not, Robb had a clear conscious.  
That was until Theon showed up one night.  
Robb could already smell the liquor on Theons breath when he opened the door.

“Really?” Robb asked slightly annoyed when Theon leaned against the doorframe and looked at him seducingly through his long lashes.

“Really.” he leaned in slightly and whispered “And now move so I can tear your pretty face apart.”

“Fuck off.” Robb glared at him “I was with you for days after what happened with your dad and you didn't even consider it necessary to say thank you.”

“You still mad because the pouting bastard broke up with you?”

“We didn't break up.” he was careful not to raise his voice in the hallway but his tone was menacing “And now fuck off.”

He stepped back, closed the door in Theons face and leaned against it.  
Theon knocked, cursed, and knocked again before Robb heard him shuffle down the hallway.  
He hadn't told anyone what had happened with Theon over the course of the last few weeks. He couldn't tell his siblings because they were his siblings, and although most of them were at least over sixteen he simply didn't want to tell them anything about Theons drunken confessions.  
His friends weren't really an option either because they all knew Theon for almost as long as he did and he was fairly sure Theon wouldn't be alright with them knowing.  
The pressure had built up constantly and Robb, being the communicative person he was, was now in desperate need of someone he could talk to without thinking about possible consequences.  
Before his brain could start making a mental list of pros and conts he had grabbed his phone.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it's me,” he paused, a lump forming in his throat “Could you come round?”

The line clicked after a beat of silence.  
Robb stared at his phone. Silence means consent. Or does it? Oh fuck that!  
He trotted in the kitchen, sat on top of the kitchen table and almost immediately got up again, played with magnets on the fridge and started drawing random patterns on his shopping list.  
The silence in his flat was unbearable but when he turned on the radio he couldn't stand it.  
His brain seemed to fire thoughts at light speed, so fast that he couldn't grasp them and it left him confused and bored at the same time.  
Fucking feelings.  
A knock on the door tore him out of the stupor he hadn't realzied he was in and for a second he contemplated ignoring the knocking in case it was Theon again.  
Robb peered through the spyhole and his eyes widened.

“I can see your feet behind the door.” the voice was muffled and Robb shuffled backwards, feeling caught and stupid, then slowly opening the door. 

“I didn't expect...um...” he stuttered.

“Me to come?” Jon finished the sentence and cocked his head “Me neither.”

Robb was still fumbling but stepped aside to let Jon in. Awkward silence stretched between them, both slightly uncomfortable in each others presence but not enough to make Jon leave again. 

“Would you stop for a second and tell me what's wrong?” he asked after he'd watched Robb pace back and forth a few times in front of the sofa.

Robb stopped and looked at him “Theon is wrong. Or no, not Theon, what happened with and because of him. Everything you know.”

Jon raised an eyebrow “Do I have to understand what you're saying?”

“Yes!” Robb flopped down on the sofa next to him and shrugged helplessly “No. I don't know.” 

“Slow down yeah?” Jon put a gentle hand on Robbs shoulder and felt the tension in it. Robb was on edge “What happened?”

Looking into Jons thoughtful eyes and feeling the warmth of his hand on his shoulder helped him settle his thoughts and he took a deep breath.  
Now that they were face to face Robb could see clearly again understood why his feelings were such a mess.

“I'm scared.” he said quietly. 

“Of what?” Jon asked in a soothing voice.

Robb licked his lips while he tried to find the right words, nagging anxiety rising in his stomach.  
He started fidgeting again.

“Come here.” Jon said and pulled him forwards so he was lying down with the back of his head on Jons thigh.  
His warm, calloused hand brushed over his brow and found its way through his hair down to his hairline were he slowly worked the tension from Robbs neck.  
Robb looked up at him, warmth pooling in his chest and he relished the feeling of being close to Jon again. 

“I don't want to lose you.”

Jons hand stilled for a moment and his lips parted in surprise.

“It's about what Theon said. He was here earlier, drunk and trying to get into my pants because he thought we broke up. I told him off” he added quickly when he saw the question in Jons eyes “He was trying the whole time since his dad died actually and I ignored it because he was having a difficult time you know but I just reached a point were I'm not willing to ignore it any longer. I don't want him to stand between us, I don't want to fight with you because he can't understand that I'm with you now, only you, and when he said we broke up I....I realised that the thought of not being with you scared the shit out of me.”

Robb watched him and although his face didn't give much away he could tell Jon was having trouble vocalizing his emotions.  
He tenderly caressed the side of Robbs face and looked deeply into his sky blue eyes.

“I'm yours Robb.” he whispered “And I'm not going anywhere.”


	22. Use Somedody-Kings Of Leon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnhXHvRoUd0

“I'm yours.” 

The words echoed in Robbs head and it took a moment for him to grasp them, to understand them.  
He felt his pulse rise and there were a thousand things he wanted so say but the words wouldn't find their way to his lips.  
All he could do was look into Jons eyes, drown in them like in oceans of ink and never waste a thought about anything else again.  
He slowly rose to his knees, never breaking their eye-contact, and placed his palm on Jons cheek.  
Jon leaned into his touch, blinked slowly and let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding.  
Robb let his hand slide down over Jons shoulder and it came to rest over his heart, feeling the other mans heart beat steadily beneath his palm. He could feel the life beneath his hand and felt a wave of relief, washing away all the sorrow and pain of the last week and replacing it with a feeling of warmth and safety.  
It was like a weight was lifted off his shoulders, his head felt light and he smiled.  
A smile that said more than a thousand words ever could.  
Jons hand found his and he intertwined their fingers, the roughness of his hand was comfortably familiar and Robb tightened his grip, never wanting to let go. 

“You're mine,” his voice was coarse “As I am yours.”

Jon leaned in an connected their lips in a tender kiss. Robb felt the warmth of his skin and the day old stubble scratching his chin and let his eyes flutter shut.  
The feeling of being together again was like taking a breath to a drowning man, all new but familiar, liberating but at the same time frightening. 

They made it to the bed this time, getting lost in each others bodies and holding onto each other like the fate of the world was depending on it.  
Robb was a galaxy and Jon was his sun, without him there was no life. He lay in Jons arms after with his head on his shoulder. 

“Promise me something?”

“Yes?”

“We'll never fight over Theon again.”

Jon scrunched up his nose and huffed out a laugh “Can't promise that.”

Robb pinched his shoulder and chuckled “Dork.”

“Princess.” 

Jon laughed. A warm, rumbling sound beneath his ear and he only realised now how much he had missed that sound. 

“Move in with me?”

 

 

 

Just a short one but I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it -xx


	23. Books From Boxes-Maximo Park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jmlWcItwxc

Jon pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at Robb in suprise.

“What?”

“I want to live with you,” he said honestly “I want to wake up every morning next to you and your grumpy face and fall asleep to you snoring next to me.”

“I don't snore.”

“You do.”

“You kick.”

“Fair enough,” Robb cocked his head and grinned “So what do you say?”

“I say you're crazy.” 

He bent over and kissed him, but Robb pushed him back a few seconds later. 

“Don't try distracting me!”

Jon laughed and let his head drop back on the pillow “Okay.”

“So?”

“I'd love to move in with you.” he answered, turning his head to look at Robb.

“But?”

“It's not that easy Robb.”

“Why not?”

“Your countertops are too high.” Jon deadpanned and pulled a strand of Robbs curls.

“Oh,” Robb licked his lips and averted his gaze “Right.”

Jon laughed again and pulled him close to kiss him “Git.”

“Feeling like one yeah.” he scratched the back of his neck with his free hand.

They stayed curled around each other for the whole night, Robb clung to him even in sleep and the next morning his arm had gone numb but he didn't mind in the slightest.  
The day went by slowly and Robb caught himself spending more time on his phone sending Jon more or less dirty texts than listening to his professors.  
He didn't go straight home after uni but after he'd done what he should have already done two weeks ago he felt slightly better.  
Not even ten minutes after he'd arrived in his flat someone knocked on the door.  
He looked through the spyhole only to see a white plastic bag being held in front of it.  
“I wanted to cook at home but Ygritte has this new guy and I wasn't exactly keen on listening to them for the whole evening.” Jon said after he'd opened the door and handed him the bag.

“So this is?” Robb asked slightly confused and closed the door behind them. 

“Incredients for Gorgonzola Risotto,” he answered naturally and grinned at Robb.

“I'm starving!” Robb exclaimed and kissed the top of Jons head.

“Get chopping then.” Jon grinned and reached into the bag, tossing him an onion. 

Robb put on some Maximo Park, soon the cheese and onions were diced and he gave Jon a hand transferring on the kitchen counter.  
While their dinner simmered on the stove Robb reached up to get two glasses from one of the cabinets, leaning in Jons space and he felt him grabbing the hem of his shirt and soon the glasses were forgotten.  
Jon kissed him until his lips were pink, his hair was a mess and they almost scrorched their dinner.  
He giggled when Robb hurried to take the pot from the stove and Robb smacked his arm with a teatowel in return.  
They shared the Risotto chatting about everything and nothing, simply enjoying the food and each others company and when the were both finished Jon put his hand on Robbs.

“I brought something else for you.” he slowly reached into his pocket and placed a small item in Robbs hand.  
When he opened it he found a key on his palm. 

Robbs mouth dropped open “Is this?”

“Yes.” Jon smiled “It's my spare. And now it's yours.”

“This is,” he paused for a moment smiling to himself “get out of my head really.”

“What?” he asked puzzled and watched Robb reach into his pocket and producing a key as well. 

“I picked it up from Theon just before I got home. Thought it was in better hands with you than with him.” he explained and handed Jon the key.

“Identical idiots I reckon.” he laughed and intertwined their hands again.


	24. If I Ain't Got You-Alicia Keys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ju8Hr50Ckwk

“You won't forget the family brunch on Sunday will you?”

Robb chuckled “No mum.”

“We don't exactly see you a lot lately, darling.”

“Yeah I'm kind of busy with uni and stuff, sorry.”

Catelyn hesitated. He started to get an idea were the conversation was heading.

“Why don't you bring your boyfriend?”

And there we go. Robb sighed and wedged his phone between his ear and shoulder to pour himself a cup of tea “Mum,”

“It would be a nice occasion,” she interrupted him “And we all would like to meet the one you have kept secret from us for so long. What was he called again?”

"Jon."

"Right, well we would really like to meet your Jon."

“By 'we' you can only mean yourself?”

“Either way, will you bring him or not?”

He ran a hand through his hair “I'll give my very best.”

“Lovely. Sunday at ten it is then. Be on time.”

He still wasn't convinced when he arrived at Jon and Ygrittes backyard half an hour later. He chained his bike to the usual lamp post and entered the workshop through the back door.

“Hey-ho!” he called.

A hand shot out from beneath the coffee table in the middle of the shop “Hey!”

Robb crouched down next to the table “What exactly are you doing?” he asked in a slightly amused voice.

“Trying to find a split in the table plate.” Jon answered naturally. He pushed the table to the side and sat up, smiling at Robb. His black locks were sprinkled with sawdust and Robb couldn't help but chuckle at the sight. 

“You sure you didn't breath in too many vapours of that wood glue?”

“Fuck off,” he laughed and playfully shoved Robbs shoulder “But what do I owe the honor of your visit?”

“Dork.” Robb smirked and kissed him quickly.

“So?”

“Yeah so,” Robb scratched the back of his head “There's this family brunch thing on Sunday and my mum asked if you'd like to come.”

“Robb,”

“It's alright if you say no,” he interrupted him “I can tell her you're busy...”

“Robb.” he repeated calmly “Sunday yeah? What time?”

Robb looked at him in suprise “You're coming? With me? To meet my family?”

Jon tried to remain serious but it was hard considering the look of utter suprsise Robb was giving him “I guess so.” he answered sheepishly.

Robb suddenly lurched forward and kissed him, Jon falling backwards and Robb on top of him and soon they were both covered in saw dust.  
When they broke apart they were both laughing and Jon was mussing Robbs hair, causing the yellow powder to trickle onto his face.

“But mind you,” Robb said with fake seriousness “They're quite a handful and they won't stop asking questions. Especially not my mum. Think Arya times four.”

“Good thing that I've got my white knight with me.” 

They were both laughing again, saw dust swirling up around them which glittered like gold in the sunshine streaming through the window.


	25. Callled Out In The Dark-Snow Patrol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwTXwJg6_VE

“Is this ok?”

“It's a black polo.” Ygritte set down her coffee cup and pulled her cardigan a little tighter around herself.

Jon rolled his eyes “Oh really I hadn't noticed.”

“Oh come on you can consider yourself lucky I even dragged myself out of bed,” she yawned extensively “I mean who gets up that fuckin' early on a Sunday morning.”

“Robb's family does obviously.”

“One reason not to like them.” she said with a smirk and took a sip of coffee.

“Why did I agree to do this again?” he scratched the back of his head.

“Because love makes ya do stupid things Jon Snow.”

“Right. So black polo yes or no?”

She cocked her head and gave him a once over “You look a bit like a funeral party but you always do so it doesn't really make a difference.”

“Much appreciated.” he said sarcastically which made her grin.

“It's the least I can do. When do you have to leave?”

“In about,” he glanced at the clock and immediately wished that he hadn't “now.”

“Good luck,” she knocked the table plate three times with her knuckles “Call me if you need help.”

He parked outside Robbs appartment building just after half past nine, they had agreed to arrive a little early because Robb had told him how much his mum would appreciate it.  
One of the first things he'd done after being up and about again had been selling his old car. The black Audi he had now was old and slighty shabby but it had an automatic gearbox and hand controls and it got him from one place to another.  
He'd taken the bus about two after getting home and those two weeks had more than enough to make him sick of the looks people were giving him. 

He was just about to text Robb to come downstairs when the front door of the building opened and Robb waved at him, crossing the little lawn in front of the building looking like a fucking film star in the bright morning light. 

“Morning.” he flopped down on the passenger seat and leaned over to kiss him quickly.

Jon took in Robbs bright smile and the sparkle in his eyes “Morning sunshine.”

“I'm happy,” his voice was soft “That you're with me today.”

“I can't decide wether I should be happy or scared.” Jon cocked his head “But when I look at you it's hard not to be happy, please stop smiling like that or I'll have to tear off your shirt...”

Robb cut him off with his laughter “You're very welcome to. Later.”

He tucked a strand of Robbs curls “I'll take you at word.”

Robb rummaged through the pile of CDs in the glove box and ended up putting on Snow Patrol, muttering something about how that was the least depressing stuff in there and rolling down the window to let his arm dangle out of it.  
Jon pushed his sunglasses up the bridge of his nose and caught a glimpse of Robb carding a hand trough his hair. Robbs presence calmed his nerves and he found himself quietly smiling to himself. 

“Take the next one on the left.”  
The Stark family home was located in a residential neighbourhood close to the wolfswood. The streets were clean and quiet and schools and playgrounds were close.  
The house itself was a victorian style house with white lattice windows, light blue blinds and an apple tree in the front garden.  
Jon killed the engine and looked over at Robb. 

“Am I allowed to be nervous?”

Robb smiled lovingly and put a hand on the side of Jons face “I love you. And so will they, and if they don't...well, it's not like I'm leaving them a choice.”

He waited until Jon had unfolded himself form the car and no five seconds after he'd rung the doorbell it burst open and he had an armful of Arya.

“Hi!” she squealed and hugged him tight “My favourite couple. Come on in!”

She pulled them inside were they were met with the whole Stark family assembled in the hall. Ned had his arm around his wifes waist and they were both smiling.  
Next to them stood Sansa, her hair as copper as Robbs but cascading down her back in light waves over her light yellow sundress. Arya was practically bouncing in between her and and the two boys, one of them lean and solemn and the other one grinning at them with crooked teeth. 

“Seriously?” Robb laughed and shook his head. 

“That's what happens when you keep your boyfriend a secret from your family.” Sansa said and brushed a strand of hair from her cheek.

“For quiet a long time!” Arya added and pointed at Robb with her index finger.

“Speaking of,” he put a hand on Jons shoulder “Someone has gone very quiet.”

Jon blinked “Sorry, uh, I wasn't prepared for this kind of welcome.”

Robb placed a chaste kiss on his cheek and chuckled “My family tends to have that effect. If I may introduce, my parents Catelyn and Eddard and my siblings Sansa, Arya, Bran and the youngest of the bunch is Rickon.”

They exchanged pleasantries but Catelyns gaze lingered a moment longer on Jon then the others.

“I do believe we have already met.” she said.

Robb looked at her in suprise but Jon nodded slowly “You brought a bed over to our shop about a year ago didn't you? And a wardrobe?” 

“My bed and wardrobe!” Sansa added.

“Yes, yes it was the year we re-did Sansas room. You work for Mr. Mormont don't you?”

“I did yes, it was shortly before he died. My friend and I run the shop now.”

Robb looked back and forth between them with a smile “I can't believe it. Seriously, this is too much of a coincidence!”


	26. Chapter 26

“You survived.” Robb closed the passenger side door and leaned over with fake seriousness on his face “I'm so proud of you young Padawan.”

“Fuck off.” Jon shoved his shoulder.

“Oh come on, don't be a bitch.” Robb made a face “I'm seriously a little proud of you, my mum and Sansa put you through quite a cross-examination.”

“Yeah,” he huffed out a laugh and pulled away from the kerb “Now they know things you didn't even know.”

“I still can't believe you're older than me!” 

“Not much.” 

“Two years!” Robb exclaimed and shot Jon a look “But you know what, I'm a Gemini and you're a Capricorn which means we are perfect.” 

“Please don't tell me you believe in that shit.” Jon said dryly.

“Sansa told me about it.” he said quickly and scratched the back of his head.

“Sure.” Jon raised an eyebrow at him which caused Robb to blush slightly.

“You coming up with me?” he asked some time later when Jon parked in front of his building.

“Sure.” 

They went inside together and in the elevator Robb noticed how Jon constantly tapped his thumb and index finger against each other, nervous habits always giving him away. 

“What is it?” he asked as he unlocked the door to his apartment.

“Nothing.” Jon answered nonchalantly.

“Come on I can practically hear the wheels in your head turning!”

“I was just wondering about something but it's silly nevermind.” he shrugged it off but Robb wouldn't give up so easily.

“Either you tell me now or you can sleep all by yourself tonight.”

Jon narrowed his eyes “You're playing dirty.”

“I know but it works.”

“Alright, if you must know,” He ran a hand through his hair and sighed “You're family is so...considerate, you know, because usually people stare, rather rudely, and it's a great thing that they don't ... I really don't know how to make this sound less stupid but you get my point?”

“You're wondering why. It's because what happened to you quite happened to my brother about a year and a half ago. Bran went rock climbing,” Robbs brow knit together “He fell and broke a vertebra pretty far down but it was enough to, you know. The doctors told us from the beginning that it was not going to be permanent,” he added quickly when he saw Jons face falter “Took him about six months to get back on his feet again and it was pretty tough, especially on my mum.”

“I can imagine.”

“I think that's why he was so shy towards you,” he added thoughtfully “Perhaps I should talk to him.”

“Robb I didn't mean to kill the mood,” he took his boyfriends hand “Your family was so sweet. I'm glad I went with you today. Really.”

Robbs face lit up with a bright smile “Me too. But trust me they will pester me with questions the next time I'm home!”

 

 

Thank you for 101 Kudos, and the lovely comments of course, it's like 101 happy Dalmatians are barking on my dashboard!  
And brace yourselves, fluff is coming....and some more stuff. Hope you're not sick of it yet ;)


	27. The Sound Of Silence-Simon and Garfunkel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zLfCnGVeL4

-Hi it's Jon, leave a message.-

Robb sighed and ended the call. He had tried to call Jon for the whole morning but only reached voice mail.  
It wasn't the first time that this happened, Jon was basically a Neanderthal in terms of technology and more often than not his phone would just be somewhere in the workshop with a dead battery, but today it felt different somehow.  
Robb couldn't explain why but he'd woken up that morning with a feeling in his stomach that something was off although he couldn't put his finger on what it was. Deciding that nothing could chase that feeling away better than Jons raised eyebrow and a nose full of saw dust he left his flat, but when he arrived at the shop he found the front and back door were locked.  
The feeling of concern he was trying to get rid of came creeping back into his mind as he crossed the backyard.

The light in the kitchen was on and he could see Ygritte sitting at the kitchen table. She looked up when he knocked on the window and a moment later she opened the front door.

“Hey.” she greeted him with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. Her hair was messy and she looked like she hadn't gotten a lot of sleep.

“Hi,” he watched her leaning against the doorframe “I tried to call Jon but he doesn't answer his phone so I figured I'd just come round.” he hesitated “Are you alright?”

She brushed a loose strand of hair from her face “He didn't tell you did he?”

“Tell me what?” 

“Come in.” 

He followed her to the kitchen where she poured two mugs of coffee and placed one on the kitchen table in front of Robb before leaning against the kitchen counter and curling her hands around her own mug.  
Watching her made the feeling of concern become more persistent, usually she was rather bubbly but today she seemed like a completely different person. Her shoulders were hanging and she had bags under her eyes.  
She sipped her coffee a few times and then took a deep breath as if to steel herself for what she was about to say.

“The reason why he hasn't been answering his phone is because,” she swallowed thickly “because he's at the cemetery. Today's the anniversary of the accident.”

Robbs heart clenched “Shit.”

Ygritte bit her lip and nodded, her eyes fixed on the floor “Yeah.”

She crossed her arms tightly over her chest, her hands disappearing in the sleeves of her black jumper and Robb got up instinctively and closed the space between them, wrapping his arms around her shoulders.  
She didn't protest which quite surprised him but today it seemed she wasn't her usual independent self but a sad and lonely young woman. Her nose buried in his shoulder and he was stroking her hair lightly.  
A quiet snifle broke the silence between them and she pulled back, wiping her cheeks with her sleeve.

“Sorry.” she said straightening her shoulders “I didn't mean to...it's just this day and this whole fucking week, gets me all over the place.”

“It's alright.” he said in a soft tone.

“No it isn't. Nothings fuckin' alright. You shouldn't be here having me snort on your jumper, Jon shouldn't be at his friends graves, all of this fuckery is just wrong.” her voice cracked “I shouldn't be standing here crying over something that happened three years ago but I do because I see the consequences of it every day and it makes me sick! I spent a whole week in a shitty hospital room waiting for the only person that I could ever call family to wake up and tell him that he's never gonna walk again, how is that alright.”

Robb was at loss what to say so he hugged her close again, her body felt small in his arms and her shoulders were trembling. 

“And now I fucked up your day as well.” her voice was muffled against his shoulder “I shouldn't have...”

“Don't apologise. If anybody has the right to have a shit day it's you.”

She huffed and pulled back to look at him “If anyone has the right it's Jon but you know him. He was like a bloody ghost this morning, here but....not here, I don't know it always freaks me out.  
He hasn't always been such a grim lad you know but since the accident...” she trailed off and shrugged “At least until you turned up.”

Robbs eyebrows shot up “Me?”

“You do him good. I haven't seen him that happy in three years.” she said thoughtfully “You love him?”

“I do.”

“Good.” she nodded and smiled reluctantly “ 'Cause he loves you. Very much.”

Robb felt a blush creep up his cheeks and averted his gaze.

“Could you do me favour?”

“Sure.”

“Don't tell Jon about, you know, what I told you. Is that alright?”

“I won't.” 

Robb went home with a lump in his throat and his hands buried deep in the pockets of his jacket. A small voice in the back of his head told him to go to the cemetery and be with Jon but if he'd learned one thing about his boyfriend than not to be pushy. As much as he wanted to be there for him he knew that Jon would tell him when he was ready, but waiting is always the hardest part isn't it?


	28. Flesh And Bone-Keaton Henson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jAqp9MtRFNo

Summer 2011

“Any preferences?” Pyp asked and searched his pocket for a plectrum.

“Just not Wonderwall.” 

He chuckled to himself and started humming along to a soft tune Ygritte faintly recocnized.  
She settled against a tree trunk and her gaze drifted across the park, the bright summer sun started to set and the heat of the day finally subsiding.   
Her, Pyp, Grenn, Jon and Sam had decided that they'd rather spent their Sunday afternoon in the shade of the trees of Godswood Park than in their stuffy flats.   
Sam had claimed he needed to study for his exams but it didn't take much to convince him to come along. Ygritte spotted him beneath a tree nearby with his nose buried in a notebook. 

“Oi 'Gritte, we could use a third!” Grenn called from across the lawn where him and Jon had been playing Hacky Sack for the better part of the afternoon.   
The three of them were friends since they'd been playing Rugby together in secondary school, Sam had entered the group when his father had forced him to join the team. Jon had spoken up for him against coach Thorne and Pyp and Grenn followed soon. They were all close friends and since there was no Jon without Ygritte she got integrated in the group pretty quickly.

She got up from the picknick blanket and crossed the lawn to join them.  
Jon smiled brightly at her and tossed up the colourfull footbag...

 

Summer 2012

Her head was swimming.   
She clutched the backrest of the chair next to her to steady herself and not flee the room she had just entered. Her hand felt numb and her stomach clenched almost to the point of pain at the sight before her.   
Perhaps someone had warned her what she was going to find but she hadn't had the strenght to listen. The only thought crossing her mind was that people were supposed to look peaceful in their sleep.  
Jon looked dead.  
His face was ashen and when she touched his hand she shrinked back internally at the coldness of his skin. The steady beeping of the heart monitor tore at her nerves and her mind couldn't grasp how he could still be alive when a machine was pushing air in and out of his lungs.  
Snippets of an earlier converstation crossed her mind but only one thing lingered.  
50/50.  
The odds were even that he would either wake up to a brace keeping him still from hip to chin or remain deathly still and wither away with time until nothing was left but skin and bones.

 

Summer 2015

Ygritte woke up with cool sweat on her brow and her heart beating against her ribs. She remained in her position, staring at the ceiling and trying to calm her breathing.  
A few moments later she pushed the covers aside, her brain was still to tired to understand where her subconscious was leading her until she opened the door to Jons bedroom. The floorboards creaked under her feet when she crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed.  
For a moment she just looked at him, the blue light of the very early morning gave his pale skin an almost strangely cold glow.   
She reached out and brushed back his sleep mussed hair 

“Jon?” her voice was barely above a whsiper.

“'Gritte?” he mumbled, his voice scratchy from sleep and cracked an eye open.

“Can I sleep here?”

He didn't answer but held up the thick black comforter for her to slip underneath it. Ygritte nestled close to him with her head on his chest and her arm draped over him.

“Are you alright?” he whispered and carressed her hair.

“Had a bad dream.” she whispered into his shoulder.

“What about?”

“The cold.”

A tear escaped the corner of her eye and she buried her head even further in his shirt and he held her close until they were both asleep again.


	29. Scarborough Fair-Simon and Garfunkel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BakWVXHSug

Ygritte still clung to him when woke up a few hours later with her head on his chest and a peaceful expression on her elfin features. Jon knew how much this time of the year troubled her, she would never admit it to anyone else but there was no pretence around him. They both bore their own scars and always offered silent comfort to each other since talking would only wear them out.  
Ygritte shifted next to him and blinked her eyes open

“Good morning.” he whispered and she smiled sleepily in return.

“Morning.” she untangled herself from him and sat up with a yawn “I'll go for a shower.” she said and stretched her arms above her head before she got up and headed to the bathroom. Jon watched her leave the room and tucked the comforter a little tighter around himself.  
Yesterday had left a bitter taste in his mouth. Time heals all wounds, that's what they say, but the pain of seeing Pyp and Grenns graves had yet to lessen. In a strange way he hoped that it never would, forgetting the pain would ultimately mean forgetting them.  
Perhaps some wounds weren't meant to heal, they would remain and one would get used to carrying them as a reminder of something that shall never be buried in oblivion.  
Deep inside Jon was as scared of forgetting as of remembering. Some mornings he would close his eyes and try to remember what it had been like to feel and to be able to get up and just move. Pictures flooded his mind and tears spilled from underneath his black lashes and he would feel the icy grip of his despair clench around his heart.  
He would get up then, try to ignore the dull ache in his hip and that his legs were so stiff they would barely bend and wash it away with a hot shower and a good stretch.  
The frustration of his own body working against him had soon turned into indifference, there was no point to him in being frustrated about something that was never going to be resolved so he simply tried to deal with it.  
Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't but Ygritte would always know.  
The morning before he hadn't talked to her and he knew how it had sent her on edge but he also knew that he wouldn't have been able to keep himself from crying if they'd talked about the day ahead of them. He would not let that to happen, Ygritte had enough on her plate as it was.  
Later, at the cemetery he had allowed himself to cry. He hadn't meant to but upon seeing the two headstones with his friends names engraved in golden letters images of the accident hit his mind like a sucker punch. It felt like all air had disappeared from his lungs and he froze for a moment until a strangled sob escaped his lips and made his shoulders tremble. He let his head drop into his hands and felt the wetness of his tears on his palms  
He didn't notice the old lady standing behind him until she silently offered him a tissue. His head shot up and he quickly wiped at his cheeks with his sleeve but she gave him an understanding smile

“Boy,” she handed him the tissue and put the package back into her purse “We're all here for the same reason.”

She walked down the cobbled path, the clicking of her heels followed her and Jon looked after her in bafflement.  
It was a bright day and the clear blue sky stretching above him reminded him of Robb. Robb who had tried to call him five times this morning. Every time his thumb had hovered over the screen of his phone and everytime he couldn't answer the call. Robb would notice something was off, he always did, and he didn't want to tell him about the mess this day made of him.  
Robb, sweet and loving Robb didn't deserve his grief to be thrust upon him. He would tell him eventually, but not today, not on a day were the birds were singing in the trees and the summer sun was bright and merry.  
Jon promised himself to call Robb tonight, the words would come out easier in the shadow of the day.

It was a hollow promise he knew he wouldn't keep.


	30. Chapter 30

The heavy feeling around his heart hadn't subsided for the whole day after his talk with Ygritte and it still clung to him the next morning.  
His phone remained silent so he decided to make use of his break from uni and go and see Bran instead. Remembering how quiet his brother had been during their brunch on Sunday he felt the need to talk to him and make sure he was alright.  
When he arrived at his parents house some time later his mother opened the door

“Hello darling,” she said with slight surprise and kissed his cheek “I didn't expect to see you that soon again.”

“I can leave if I'm not welcome.” he said jokingly and his mother shot him a look which made him laugh “But actually I'm here to see Bran, he's been really quiet on Sunday and I wanted to make sure he's alright.”

“Yes Robb about that...” 

“If you're going to say what I think you'll say..don't say it!” he interrupted her a littly briskly “Sorry.” he added quietly

“I know you don't want to hear this,” Catelyn said with an almost apologetic expression “But are you sure that you made the right choice with Jon? It's not that I don't like him it's rather...” she trailed off and Robb had to keep himself from rolling his eyes.

“Just say it,mum! Jon is physically disabled, I know. But I know about all the stuff that comes with it , we've been together for almost six months.” he answered sharply.

“Please Robb I don't want to fight,” she retorted calmy “I am your mother, it's my job to say things you don't want to hear because I want you to be happy.”

“Jon makes me happy.”

Catelyn smiled fondly “You're an adult and I trust in your judgement, always keep that in mind.”  
He blushed slightly “I will, thanks mum.”

“And now go see your brother.” she ushered him upstairs and smiled before she went downstairs again.

“Hey Branflakes, it's me!” he called and knocked on the door.

“Come in.”

When he entered the room Bran looked up from his books and smiled at him “What's up?”

Robb sat on the edge of the bed and hesitated for a quick moment “I kind of wanted to talk to you about Sunday. You barely said anything and I was just wondering if me being with Jon bothers you because...”

“No.” Bran interrupted his rambling “No, it's not because he's in wheelchair, I mean it felt kind of strange for a second but that's definitely not it.”

“That's good.” he said with relief “But what is it then? And don't try to deny it, I can see there's something going on.”

“You two are so happy,” he said and shrugged “The way you look at each other and...” 

“And what?”

Bran worried his lip with his teeth “There's someone at school Robb and I think I...”

“Like her?”

“Him.” he deadpanned.

Robbs eyebrows shot up “Oh.”

“That's very helpful, thanks.” 

“Have you told mum and dad yet?” 

“No!” he exclaimed “And I'd like to keep it to myself for now yeah?”

“I won't say anything.” Robb raised his hands in defence and grinned.

Bran drew his eyebrows together and watched his brother intentely “How did you do it with Jon?”

“How did I do what?”

He rolled his eyes “Find out wether he was team boys or team girls?”

That made Robb chuckle and Bran rolled his eyes again “I just asked him. Sometimes you have to take a risk.”  
“But what if he hates me then?” he asked worriedly.

Robb shrugged “Then he hates you. It's a shit advice I know but that's just how it goes. Maybe he breaks your nose maybe he kisses you who knows but you have to make a move.”

Bran nodded and looked at his brother “Thank you.”

“No worries,” he smiled but felt his phone vibrate in his pocket “Speaking of making a move. Hello?”

“Hey, it's me. You free tonight?” 

It wasn't until later that evening when he heard a car door outside his apartment building that his thoughts returned to yesterdays events. His thoughts wandered to Ygritte and he wondered how she was doing but the knock on the door interrupted his musings.  
Jons smile was reluctant and once inside Robb leaned his forehead against Jons and brushed their noses together. 

“I missed you.”

His breath ghosted over Jons lips and he tipped his head back to study his boyfriends face.

“You know it.” 

Robb internally cursed his face for never being able to keep something hidden and nodded slowly “I dropped by at your place yesterday.”

“Ygritte?”

Robb didn't answer but placed his hand on Jons and looked deeply into his eyes “Why didn't you tell me?” he asked softly.

Jon shrugged defensively and dropped his gaze “I didn't want to burden you with it.”

“No,” Robbs voice was small and he tightened his hold on Jons hand “Don't say that, you wouldn't have, there's nothing you can't tell me.”

“I didn't want to bring all this shitty emotional baggage in our relationship. Right now I'd rather not think about it.” he said sombrely.

“Well,” he brushed a strand of hair from Jons face “I can help with that.”

The kiss was bittersweet and Jons lips were chipped and rough against his own but it didn't matter because he felt whole again. Robb wound an arm around his waist and held him close as a gesture of silent reassurance.  
Jon leaned into the touch and Robb dipped his head to kiss the nape of his neck.

“Thank you for being with me.” 

Robb closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, the smell of wood and soap and Jon filling his mind and his fingers got lost in his curls “There's no place I'd rather be than with you.” 

Jon scrunched up his nose and grinned “That was cheesy, even for you.”

“Let me be cheesy if I want to.” he said and pouted jokingly. Jons grin widened and he leaned in and kissed him sweetly, his hand warm and solid on Robbs shoulders.

“Come away with me.” Robb said suddenly after they'd broken apart.

“What?”

“My family has a house in Brighton,” he leaned back to look in his boyfriends surprised face “We could spend the weekend there, get away from this misery for a few days.”

Jon still looked at him with eyes as big as saucers.

“Just say yes.”


	31. Say Something-Boy Epic

They reached Brighton in the early Saturday morning after both of them had made all necessary arrangements that they had the weekend off.

“I want to watch the sunrise with you.” Robb had said dreamily on Wednesday and although Jon knew that they would have to leave Wintertown around midnight then he hadn't been able to deny Robb his wish.

The city around them was still asleep, only a few cars were on the streets and the occasional sound of a shutter being openend were the only things indicating life.  
The sun was not on the rise yet but some light was already starting to creep over the horizon and the sky was a light blue.  
The twilight hour.  
Jon parked as close as possible to the seafront, they crossed the broad promenade and then stood by the railing separating them from the stony shore.  
The sound of the waves and the screeching of the sea gulls filled the air and the sky was cloudless.  
Robb took a deep breath, the clear morning breeze was warm and salty and carried the promise of a beautiful summer day. He let his hand slide across the chipped paint of the railing to find Jons hand but instead met an elbow. Jon had put his forearm on the railing and leaned his chin on it, the wind playing with his hair and a faraway look in his eyes.  
Robb let his hand slide over Jons forearm and caressed his cheek with his thumb, causing Jon to blink up at him. 

“It's beautiful isn't it?”

Jon caught his hand and pulled him forwards, planting a kiss on his lips .  
“Like you.” he said huskily.

Robb smiled and lowered himself on the concrete floor, leaning his head against Jons knees.  
Jons hand found its way into Robbs hair and they let silence wash over them, gazing at the ocean and both lost in their own thoughts.  
The first rays of sunlight were slowly peeking over the horizon and started to tint the surface of the ocean a soft pink.  
Robb could make out a boat in the distance, nothing more than a tiny white spot in a sea of blue and soft rose. 

“I'd love to go down to the water.” he said absently. 

“Go for it. I'll wait here and watch you get wet.” 

Robb craned his neck to look at him “You could come down to the beach and wait there, there's a ramp over there and the view from the beach is stunning.”

Jon followed his gaze and then looked back at Robb whose smile was so bright that there was no way he could say no.  
They went down together and both took their shoes off and Robb roled up his jeans while Jon lowered himself on the floor just were the concrete of the ramp met the gravel.

“Jon?” 

He looked up and put his Chucks aside “Yes?”

Robb turned his head to look at the sea and then back at Jon again “Do you trust me?” 

Jon cocked his head and hesitated for a moment “I do.” 

Before he could say anything else Robb bent down and hoisted him up in his arms, Jons breath catching in his throat and he held onto Robbs shirt reflexively.  
Robb lowered his head and kissed him tentatively “Alright?”

He raised his eyes to meet Robbs and nodded ever so faintly “I trust you.”

Robb slowly made his way towards the water, the cool gravel of the beach crunching with each of his steps and Jon hid his face in the crook of his neck.  
When he felt his feet getting wet he lowered himself onto the beach so that Jon was sitting between his legs 

“Hey,” he whispered “Look.”

Jon slowly raised his head and opened his eyes.  
The sea was stretching out before them, endless waves of blue and pink with spume glistening like diamonds in the pure morning light.  
The waves pooled around them, the breeze driving them up the shore.  
Robb wound his arms around Jon, leaning his chin on his shoulder and he could feel Jons breath shudder.  
Another wave washed over their legs, spume splashing up and Jons hand clutched his forearm as if he was afraid to be carried away.  
Robb nuzzled his neck with his nose and Jon turned his head to face him, his charcoal eyes so charged with emotion it made a shiver run down Robbs spine.  
It was only the tiniest motion that brought their lips together and the pure feeling of the moment was so intense that it made Robbs head swim.  
The waves continued their endless dance up and down the shore, soaking them both in salty water.  
They broke the kiss in favour of air but Jon held him firmly in place, face to face their breath mingling and the tiny tingle each time their lashes brushed each others cheeks when blinking still connecting them.  
There they were, two lovers by the sea, soaking wet, happy and surrounded by nothing but peace and silence.  
The sun rose on the horizon and they moved further up the beach then, letting the first warming rays of sunlight warm them and dry their soaked clothes.  
When dripping wet had been reduced to damp they made their way back to car, Jon complaining about how the car seats would be soaked and Robb shrugging it off with laugh and a kiss. 

The house was small and cosy, painted in a light yellow with a blue letterbox.  
Robb took their bag from the boot and they entered through the back door as there were steps at the front door. The house still looked exactly the same as Robb rembered it, he had spent almost every summer of his childhood down here with his family. Happy memories of days at the beach and nights spent with his family crowded around the coffee table and playing Monopoly flooded his mind and he smiled to himself.  
The warm light of the morning sun flooded the room and Jon looked at him with eyes way brighter than the sun could ever be. Robb lead him to the ground floor bedroom and he rumaged trough their bag while Robb put fresh linens on the queens sized bed.  
He curled up against Jon later and he could smell the sea on both of them, mixing with the crisp smell of the linens and he felt at home.  
Robb and Jon would make their own memories of this house now.


	32. Sunrise-Norah Jones

Robb woke around midday, the sun was up in the sky and he reached over to the other side of the bed only to find cold sheets.  
He blinked lazily and spotted a piece of paper on the pillow 

Went to get some breakfast  
Love you

It said in Jons neat handwriting and Robb couldn't help a big smile spreading over his face. He stretched beneath the sheets, limbs nearly reaching the edge of the bed and padded to the bathroom.  
When he exited the shower and tucked a blue shirt over his head the smell of coffee filled his nose. He mussed up his still damp hair and went to the kitchen and what greeted him there almost made his jaw drop.  
In the centre of the round table was a vase filled with red poppy and cornflowers, his favourites, and around it the table was set for two. 

“Good morning.” Jons smile was as bright as the sunlight streaming through the big window facing the small back garden. 

“It is a good morning,” he nodded at the table “So that's what you mean when you say you get some breakfast.”

Jon laughed “Don't get used to it.” 

“Pity.” he grinned and sat down while Jon poured two mugs of coffee and placed one in front of Robb.

“Happy Birthday.” 

Robbs eyes went big “You remembered?”

“Had a reminder on my phone.” Jon aswered impishly.

Warmth pooled in Robbs stomach at that statement and he leaned forward and kissed Jon ever so sweetly. He'd been fairly sure that things like this only happened in films but the man he loved had made it become real for him.  
Jons hand slid across the table and placed an item in his hand. Robb closed his hand around it and pulled back slowly, not wanting to break the kiss but curiosity got the best of him.  
He opened his hand and found a small black box on his palm. His eyes shot up to look at Jon who looked slightly nervous. 

“Go ahead.”

Robbs index finger traced the soft edge of the velvet box and he felt his heart beat steadily against his ribs.  
He opened it and amidst the black velvet inside sat an artless silver ring.

“Is this...?” his breath caught in his throat.

“It is whatever you want it to be.” Jon said softly. 

Robb tenderly traced the silver band with his thumb “What is it to you?”

Jon looked at him, drinking in his gorgeous face and eyes as blue as the cornflowers.

“First and foremost it's a birthday present. And it's a promise,” he answered thruthfully “that I won't leave you until you get sick of me. And it's a Thank You for last week. To be honest, if I were you it would have driven me off. It's been a shit situation for both of us but more so for you and I'm grateful that you are you and that you stayed.”

Jons plain honesty caught him somewhat off guard and he felt his lips part in suprise 

“That's the reason why I'll never get sick of you.”


	33. Flight Attendant-Josh Rouse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDuY4m6FqaQ

They spent the afternoon sprawled out on the lawn in the back garden with the sun beating down on them and the grass still cool to the touch.  
When sun was starting to glow orange in the west and the heat subsided they went to Waitrose down the road to get some groceries and later when Jon kissed Robb and the taste of roasted peppers and olive oil lingered on his tongue along with red wine and Robb nuzzled their noses together he felt like he could write a thousand pages but never truly capture that night. The breeze carressing their exposed arms was cool but the air smelled like summer and the glass doors leading to the patio were open and Jons Joao Gilberto CD playing quietly from the stereo in the living room completed the mood along with the clear dark blue sky littered with stars.  
Robb swirled the wine in his glass and watched the crimson liquid tint the clear glass a light pink and then slowly run down the inside of the glass. He let the taste of dark chocolate and red berries fill his mind and let his gaze drift from the stars above him to Jon next to him. His mind had been wandering back to this one question that lingered in the back of his brain for the whole day and he couldn't stop himself from asking anymore. 

“Jon?”

“Hmm?” he turned his head lazily to look at Robb.

“I was wondering, what you said the other week when I asked you about having children. Did you mean it?” Robb asked reluctantly.

Jons expression froze for a second and they looked at each other for a few heartbeats before Jon intertwined their hands.

“I usually mean what I say.” he answered calmy.

Robbs lips tightened but he gave half a shrug and nodded “Okay.”

Jon leaned his head to the side and studied his boyfriends face “It's not, it's bothering you.”

A voice in Robbs head screamed 'Yes!' and he opened his mouth to say something but he remained quiet and shrugged again. “Kind of.”

Jons expression was serious and he cupped Robbs face with his palm. They had dodged that moment for so long, had always managed to tip-toe around the topic of the fear of limitations.  
“Robb please, talk to me.”

“It's just,” he couldn't quite hold Jons gaze and his brows knit together when he searched for the right words “I always kind of wanted children you know.”  
It didn't even sound half as sophisticated as he wanted it and the relief he'd thought he'd feel after telling him didn't come. Instead he felt like he was squirming and fidgeting and Jons gaze was was leaving trails on his face.  
The moments of silence that followed were heavy and Robbs gaze was fixed on the grass beneath them when said quietly “Please say something.” 

Two warm fingers touched his jaw and tilted his head upwards and their eyes met.

“I don't know what to say.” 

Robb blinked and he sensed a strange coldness in his hands, something he'd never felt before. Jons hands were always warm, his whole existence was radiating and to Robb it would sometimes feel like a shockwave when they were together. It was this feeling Robb fell in love with when they first met but right now that feeling was missing and he worried. 

“It's the one thing I can't give you.” Jons voice was quiet but he still held their eye contact and Robb felt the urge to look away.

“Why?” it was such a plain and simple word but it expressed everything that went on in his head at that moment.  
Jons lips tightened and Robb could almost feel how much he didn't want to answer that question and he squeezed Robbs hand “Because it wouldn't be right. And before you ask again why” he answered in a measured voice “I know you don't want to hear it but there are a lot of things I simply can't do. Things parents should be able to do like playing football. And what would it be like, imagine a kid having to explain to his friends that he's got two dads and one of them is a paraplegic joiner? Kids can be fucking cruel Robb. What if something happend to you and I wouldn't be able to care of the kid because of my body? Could you live with that? I didn't have parents, how could I ever be one without fucking up? Every kid deserves a childhood like yours Robb, but can you see that with us?”

Robb swallowed thickly. Everything Jon had said was true but it still made his stomach knot. 

“Robb?”

He blinked and felt a sting at the back of his eyes and his lower lip trembled slightly and before he could even wipe his hand across his cheek a tear had escaped the corner of his eye.

“Shit, Robb I didn't mean to,” Jon reached over and pulled him close and Robb buried his nose in the crook of his neck “I'm sorry, I should've kept my mouth shut.” he whispered in Robbs hair and pressed a light kiss on his forehead.

Robb snifled in return and elbowed him in the side “Fuck you,” Jon could feel Robbs face scrunch against his pectoral “You're right. I don't want you to be right!” 

Jon let out a long breath “Me neither.”

Robb pulled back a little and looked at him “Did you ever want children?”

Jons curls brushed over Robbs cheekbones when he nodded slowly “Feels like a fucking lifetime ago now. Robb, there's one thing, don't ever think it's because of you. It's not, I love you and if it weren't for...”

“I get it.” he interrupted him with a soft smile “I love you too.”

Robb wound his arm around his waist to find Jons hand and when he slwoly traced his knuckles with his index finger he felt the warmth seep through his body again, even on the tip of his index finger.  
Life would go on, what counted was that they had each other and Robb had set his priorities. 

“Marry me?”


	34. Something Inside Of Me-The Coral

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments my lovely darlings! :)

 

_2008_

 -R we gonna talk about last n8?-

 

Robb lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling, his phone next to him and the screen was still illuminated with Theons text but he didn't know what to reply.

The memory of last night was still vivid in his mind: Thorren Karstarks birthday party, Vodka Lemon and Theons tongue in his mouth. How exactly had it come to this?

His phone buzzed again.

 

-S'not that I mind, just didn't expect it ;)-

 

Yeah, one could call it unexpected that the well behaved son of Ned Stark had kissed a bloke he'd met a few weeks ago in school at his cousins birthday party.

He could blame Theon, Balon Greyjoys boy who was everything but well behaved, or the booze but he didn't. The fact that he'd started to notice Loras Tyrell's handsome face rather than his sister Margaerys and that his thoughts late at night would rather drift to boys showering than girls had caught up with him soon enough.

Theon had showed up in his Biology class three weeks ago and flopped down next to him with a grin on his face. Robb couldn't explain why but from that moment on he'd somehow felt drawn to him, like a piece of metal by a magnet. They started to hang out after school and Robb couldn't help but notice that Theon was attractive in his own, self-confident way. Theon didn't hide the fact that he wasn't picky, boy or girl, it didn't matter and Robb found himself strangely intrigued by that.

 

-Come on Stark, don't be a girl.-

 

Robb was just about to reply when he heard his mother call his name from downstairs. He put his phone aside and trotted down the stairs, a slight headache forming behind his eyes.

Trying to hide his hangover at least a little entered the living room and was greeted by both his parents waiting for him by the sofa with a serious expression on their faces. He stopped by the coffee table and drew his eyebrows together.

 

“Did I miss something?”

 

Catelyn glared at him “We could ask you the same question.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“We need to talk to you.” Ned went to stand by his wifes side and put a hand on her shoulder “Sansa left her phone on the kitchen table and someone sent her a picture of...”

 

 _Oh fuck!_ shot through Robbs head.

 

“Of you kissing another boy on some party.” Catelyns voice was constricted.

 

Robb shifted his weight, his parents gaze making him uncomfortably and his mind raced to find something to say.

 

“Silence is not an answer, Robb,” Ned said in a measured voice “ What do you have to say to this?”

 

“Can't really deny it, can I?”

 

“But why did you do it?” his mother demanded “I thought you...”+

 

“Liked girls?” he cut her off “Well, obviously I don't.”

 

“Don't interrupt your mother,” his father warned “But I am asking myself the same, Robb. Where did that come from?”

 

“I don't know,” Robb shrugged and dropped his gaze “I just...figured it out I guess.”

 

A moment passed before Catelyn spoke again “But...why?”

 

He huffed “Why?”

 

“You and the Westerling girl always got along so well...” she trailed off.

 

“Jeyne? She's just a friend!”

 

“Robb please,” his father said calmly “We're not angry, we are trying to understand you.”

 

He shoved his hands into his pockets “I'm gay. What more's there to understand?”  

It was the first time that he'd said it out aloud and he felt a wave of confidence wash over him the moment the words had left his mouth although he hadn't missed how his mother had flinched.

 

“Are you sure it is not just a phase?” Catelyn asked, her hands knotting in her lap.

 

“No.” he answered decidedly and straightened his shoulders.

 

“Still, how did that photo end up on your sixteen-year old sisters phone?” his father asked in a stern voice “Does she know it?”

 

“Someone must've taken it at Thorrens birthday party,” he paused and looked at his parents “and yes, she knows.”

 

“She too young for such things!” his mother argued.

 

“She's sixteen! And she wasn't even half as shocked as you are!”

 

Catelyn shook her head angrily but his father took a step towards him and put a hand on his shoulder “We were always honest with you and your siblings, Robb. I have to say your mother and I are not very pleased about this. Please, think about it. But whatever you do, you will always be our son.”

Robb held his fathers gaze and he felt the spark of independence in his heart, he knew how hard saying these words must have been for his father and how his mother felt rejected that he didn't tell her before. He loved them for the fact that they didn't shout and disinherit him on the spot but remained calm and tried to show him their understanding.

 

“Does that mean Robb is going to marry a boy?” little Arya piped up over dinner later that night and Sansa glared at her across the table but Robb just chuckled as he watched his mothers face freeze.

 

 

Seven years later Robbs thoughts drifted back to that night and he found himself smiling softly at the memory of Sansa and Arya bickering.

“I suppose it does.” he mumbled to himself and  wound his arm a little tighter around Jon who was sleeping with his head on Robbs chest.

 

 

 

 


	35. You've got the love-Florence + The Machine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is so short I almost feel bad but I just had to upload it before my holiday is officially finished and I don't have enough time for writing again.  
> Enjoy :)

“Marry me?”

“What?” Jons eyebrows met his hairline and he pushed himself up in his elbows to get a clear view at Robbs face whose expression started to look more and more deflated. 

“That's not what I expected.”

“That's not what I expected!” he retorted and couldn't keep himself from laughing when Robbs expression froze in a mix of excitement and complete shock. 

“You're such an idiot sometimes!” he exclaimed and shoved Jons shoulder who was still grinning like a Cheshire cat. 

“And you are so cute when you're trying to be angry.” Jon said and caught his forearm when Robb tried to get up and pulled him back down on the sunbed.

“I am!” he sat down and crossed his legs “I propose and you take a piss!” 

Jon sat up and looked at him “I'm not taking a piss,” he replied honestly and took Robbs hands in his, a soft smile on his lips “You just took me by suprise, like completely.”

Robb narrowed his eyes but couldn't help the smile that was spreading on his face “What happened to the good old yes.”

“What if I say no.” he requited with a flash in his eyes.

“Let's just pretend the last two minutes never happened.”

Jon laughed again and leaned forwards until their faces were so close their lips met and he wound his arm around Robbs neck to pull him down with him so Robbs body was covering his and their kiss deepened.  
When they broke apart in favor of air Robb looked at him through hooded eyes but he didn't miss the hint of insecurity in his gaze and Jon brought his hand up to cup his cheek.

“I would never say no to you.” he whispered.

Robbs lips parted in suprise and for a moment nothing happened before he crashed their lips together again and buried his hands in Jons hair and laughed in his mouth.  
The night air was mild and for once Robb was glad for the hedge which shielded the garden from view as they shed their clothes and they silently agreed that Robbs family could never know what they did on said sunbed. Time passed and the night got darker but they didn't move from their spot in the garden. They stayed huddled together, both heavy and warm and their bodies melting together. 

“We have to go back tomorrow.” Robb said and blinked, half his view on the stars was blocked by Jons black mop of hair.

“Evening.” he mumbled against Robbs shoulder.

“Still.”

“Still more than twelve hours away.”

“Are we going to tell anyone?” he asked, realising that dropping hints still didn't work with Jon. 

“Do you want to?”

“I don't know,” he curled a strand of Jons hair around his index finger “Do you?” 

“Let's wait for a week or so, we should wrap our own heads around it before telling anyone else.”

“How grown-up of us.” Robb smirked and reached behind him to find his jeans on the lawn and fumbled with the pocket until he found what he was looking for.  
He let his hand slide over Jons chest and when he found his hand he kissed him and opened his hand to let the little item slide onto Jons palm “I love you.”

“I love you too.” he answered when he slid the ring on Robbs left ring finger. 

It fit perfectly.


	36. St. Petersburg-Supergrass

They left Brighton around noon and once in the car Robb checked his phone for the first time since they'd left Wintertown.

 

“I've got like a thousand missed calls from my mum.” he said with a chuckle and scrolled through his unread messaged when the name above one particular text caught his eye. It was from Theon.

His thumb hovered over the screen for a moment before he put his phone in the centre console and carded a hand through his hair before leaning his arm onto the handle of the car door. A smile formed on his lips when his eyes landed on the silver band on his ring finger but in the same moment he couldn't help his thoughts wandering back to Theon.

 

“What are you thinking about?” Jon asked suddenly.

 

“Am I intruding your broooding rights?” he asked and Jon flashed him a look before looking back at the road.

 

“Come on, spit it out.”

 

Robb smilled and shook his head at his boyfriends tenacity. _Fiancé_ he reminded himself which caused his smile to broaden for a moment.

 

“I got a text from Theon,” he answered finally “I just realised that we really need to talk, I haven't heard from him since the night he turned up on my doorstep. After all he's still my friend and we should resolve this I reckon.”

 

“Yeah you should.” Jon nodded.

 

“Beg you a pardon?” Robb asked with a dumbfounded look on his face “No 'Leave it Theon is an idiot' answer?” he added imitating Jons voice which earned him a snort and a scrunched up nose. 

 

“For the record, I still don't like him but he's your friend nonetheless so yeah, call him or whatever and become BFFs again.”

 

“Put the sarcasm away now yeah?” 

 

Nonetheless, that was exactly what Robb did the next evening. At first he thought Theon perhaps wouldn't pick up the phone but that thought was unessecary when the ringing had stopped.

 

“Hi.” 

 

“Hey, it's Robb.”

 

“I know,” he could almost hear the smirk that was playing around Theons lips “Caller ID, ever heard of it?”

 

“Smart-arse,” he shot back “but listen, about what happened that night at my place...we should get some things clear, mate.”

 

“Yeah, I suppose we should.” he agreed “Meet you at Winterfell in twenty?” 

 

“Right, see you then.” 

 

He ended the call, grabbed his keys and wallet and when he laced his shoes he felt the silver chain with his ring on it shift beneath his shirt. 

_ _ _Engagement ring._ It still sounded somewhat strange in his head but at the same time the he felt like he truly belonged to someone now, that he had found his place in the world. 

 

Winterfell was a pub in the old part of Wintertown, just a few streets away from Jon and Ygrittes shop and he played with the thought of dropping by at theirs later but first things first.

Theon was already waiting for him at a table by the wall and after Robb had ordered and approached the table he shifted in his seat. 

 

“Hey mate.”he greeted Theon and placed his glass on the table before shrugging off his jacket “Alright?”

 

“Fine.” he answered with a lopsided grin “You?”

 

Robb nodded and sat down across from him “So.”

 

“So?”

 

“What happened that night?” 

 

“Straight to the point aye?” Theon said and took a sip while Robb watched him intentely “To be honest...I don't really know.” he added after a beat of silence “I acted like a tosser, that I know, and I'm sorry, mate. Really.”

 

“S'fine,” Robb nodded and looked at Theon “But please, never again.” 

 

Theon grinned “I'll try to behave.” he looked at his hands “It was just shitty timing after what happened with my dad and all. Thanks for staying with me, by the way.”

 

“That's what mates are for.” he waved it off and Theons shoulders sagged with relief.

 

“By the way, how's it going with Jon?”

 

Robb smiled “Really good,” he paused and debated in his head for a moment wether he should tell Theon or not “That good, actually.” he added and gently pulled at the silver chain to reveal the ring. 

 

“No way,” Theons eyes went wide with suprise “You're engaged you sad bastard! I don't know wether to congratulate you on it or offer my condolences!”

 

The answer was so classically Theon that it made him laugh “Just be happy for us.”

 

“I am, mate, I am.” Then said with an honest expression “I would never wish you ill.”

 

Robb told him about their weekend in Brighton and couldn't stop himself from raving about it and Theon just listened to him with a lopsided grin on his face.

Robb hadn't realised how much he'd missed those evenings spent with Theon where they would just talk about everything and nothing and unwind together. When they'd both finished their drinks they decided to call it a night and after they'd left the pub his way led him to Jon without even thinking. Letting himself in the flat with his spare key still felt a unfamiliar.  _I've got plenty of time to get used to_ he thought to himself while shedding his jacket.

Ygritte was still awake and put her book aside when he entered the living room.

 

“Finally making use of that key?” she asked with a smile.

 

“Thought it was about time.” Robb shrugged and jiggled the keys together “Jon still up?”

 

“No.” she picked up her book again “You sure you want wake the dragon?” she added with a wink, referring to Jons general grumpiness when someone woke him.

 

“Pretty sure,” he grinned “See you in the morning.”

 

“Good night.” 

 

He went trough the little hallway and opened the bedroom door as quietly as possible. Once inside he shed his clothes and smirked at the soft snores coming from the pile of blankets in the middle of the bed. Robb slipped under the covers and sneaked an arm around Jons waist which caused him to shift.

 

“It's me.” Robb whispered and nuzzled his nose in the crook of his neck. 

 

Jon grumbled something untilligible and turned his head to place a soft kiss on Robbs lips “ 'ow did go with Theon?”

 

“I told him.” Robb blurted out before he could stop himself and he felt Jon smile against his lips.

 

“I told Ygritte.”

 

“That much for waiting.” he retorted and huddle a little closer towards Jon who almost immediately wound his hand around his neck to kiss him passionately. 

 

“Fuck waiting.” 

 

 

 


	37. I'm Not The Only One-Sam Smith

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just can't help writing fluff, sorry guys :D

The whole next day at uni Robb had trouble listening to his professor with the cool chain resting against his chest.  
After the last lecture he put his textbook in his bag and when his eyes fell on the fresh clothes inside he couldn't help but think about how his drawer at Jons place was constantly filling. Once at the flat he let himself in and he found Jon at the desk in the living room. 

“Hey.” he wound his arms around Jon shoulders from behind and kissed his cheek. 

He returned his kiss quickly “Just have to finish this up, Ygritte's out with Tormund,sorry.” he looked at him apologetically before returning to the papers.

“Who's Tormund?” 

“New boyfriend.” Jon mumbled. 

“Okay.” Robb smiled to himself and flopped onto the couch and pulled out the notes he took earlier. He put his feet up on the armest and started high-lighting important passages.

Time ticked by and he got through six pages before he put the sheets and high light pen on the coffee table “What are you working on?”

“We had a meeting with a possible client this morning.” Jon answered absently, his gaze still fixed in the papers spread on the desk. 

“How did it go?” 

“Not good.”

“How's that?” he inquired.

Jon turned around to face him “Basically he said he doubted we could deliver on time because,” his face hardened “because of certain physical impairments.”

“What?” Robb sat up straight. 

“Yeah.” he shruggged but Robb didn't miss the hint of bitterness in his voice. 

“That arsehole.” Robb shook his head “That's more than unprofessional.” he added and outstretched his arm “Come here, you've been brooding over those papers for long enough.” 

Jon shot a last glance at the desk before wheeling over to the couch where Robb was looking at him through hooded eyes. As soon as he'd transferred Robb pushed him down on his back so he was hovering above Jon to kiss him laggardly but stopped abruptly when he felt Jons leg jiggling beneath his own. It happened a lot but Robb hadn't quite managed to get used to it yet.

“Alright?” he asked as he watched him intentely. 

“Fine, it's just from staying in one position for too long.” Jon answered and shook his head dismissively. 

“You're never truly honest about it with me.”

“I am,” he said quickly and cupped Robbs face “I'm completely honest with you, Robb, you know that.”

Robb smiled down at him and moved to the side a bit so he lay next to him but half his body still covering Jons and he traced his collarbone with his index finger “My financé.” he whispered and Jon wound his arm a litte tighter around his shoulders. 

“What's that?” Robb asked suddenly as a plain black box at the bottom shelf of the book shelf caught his eye.

“A box obviously.”

“No shit,” he made a face at Jon “What's in it?”

“Nothing important.” he answered nonchalantly but before he could say anything else Robb got up and crouched in front of the bookshelf. 

“No way!” he exclaimed a second later “Look how cute you were!” he added and turned around with a school photo in hand. 

Jon sighed and sat up fully when Robb grabbed the box and returned to the couch with it. He pushed some pillows aside to make room for himself to sit before he crossed his legs and put the box down in between them.  
He rummaged through the box and cocked his head when he pulled out another photo.

“Who's that?” 

“Oh,” Jon scratched the back of his neck “My ex.”

Robb gauged at the boy on the picture for a moment before saying “I'm hotter than him.”

“Yeah you are.” Jon laughed and Robbs hand disappeared in the pile of photos again. 

He pulled out photos of Ygritte with a broad, gap-toothed grin on her face, of Pyp, Grenn and Jon in mud spattered Rugby attire, of concerts in the rain and Jons journeyman's piece until one in particular caught his eye.

“Can I keep this one?” Robb asked with his eyes still fixed on the photograph in his hand. It showed Jon standing in front of a red brick wall, clad in all black with his hands in his pockets. He didn't look directly at the camera but slightly to the side and Robb could't help but marvel at the seemingly skin tight black jeans. 

“I don't look like that anymore.” he retorted with a hint of sadness in his voice when Robb flipped the photo to show it to him. 

“To me you do.” Robb said with a fond look on his face and Jon looked at him and caught his lower lip between his teeth. 

“Are we going to add a wedding photo soon?” he asked almost shyly.

Robb smiled and nodded slowly “Soon.”


	38. By The Monument-Maximo Park

_Tonight at Winterfell, 8:30_

_Small announcement to make ;)_

 

Robb grinned quietly to himself as he posted the text in the newly created Whatsapp group and watched the messages throughout the day.

 

_Who's pregnant? -Theon_

 

_-_- No one! idiot_

_I hope... -Jeyne_

 

_Back in Wintertown for a day and the first thing I read is that...great start -Edd_

 

_I'm not! -Ygritte_

 

_What? -Sam_

 

_Pregnant :P -Ygritte_

 

_Gilly? -Theon_

 

_Shove it -Gilly_

 

_Robb? -Theon_

 

_Why is he in the group again? -Sam_

 

_Because I'm awesome -Theon_

 

Robb stifled a laugh with the back of his hand which caused Jon to shoot him a look

 

“Whats so funny?”

 

Instead of answering he showed him his phone with a broad grin on his face.

 

“A fifteen year old hiding in the body of a grown man.” Jon shook his head with an amused look on his face.

 

Robb didn't answer for a moment, contemplating.

“I was thinking about inviting Sansa.”

 

“Do you really want to confront her with this bunch?”

 

Robb shrugged with an impish grin.

 

_Gonna be @Winterfell in 10 -Gilly_

 

_Me2 -Edd_

 

_Could someone please tell me what's the big thing tonight? -Sansa_

 

_Neither of us knows -Gilly_

 

_Whatever, cu in 10 -Sansa_

 

Robb dipped the tip of his index finger into the small pudlle of condensed water on the table and started drawing lazy circles on the table.

 

“Nervous?” Jons voice interrupted his musings.

 

He shrugged in reply “Don't know, you?”

 

“Got you as back up.” he answered and leaned over to kiss him quickly.

 

“Oi!”

 

They both looked towards the door to see Ygritte approaching the table with a tall man in two. As they came to a halt by the table she hugged Jon while Robb got up to introduce himself.

 

“Hi, Robb Stark.” he said and couldn't help but notice how short he felt in comparison to the other man.

 

“Tormund.” he smiled and extended his hand.

 

“So,” Ygritte begun and she sat down while Tormund went to get their drinks “today's the day. Does anyone know apart from me and Theon?”

 

“No,” Robb shook his head “and I'm still surpised he managed not to accidently write it in the group.”

 

One by one all the others arrived and soon the large table was crowded and friendly chatter mixed with the clinking of glasses.

Most of their friends already knew each other but the few who didn't were quick to join the conversation. Sansa was the last one to come in and sat next to Jeyne as she was the only one she knew apart from Theon.

Robb put his hand on Jons to get his attention and looked at him questioningly. Jon just just smiled and shrugged whereupon Robb grabbed a knife from the basket on the table and knocked it against his glass a few times.

 

“I think you're all wondering why you're here...”

 

“Hurry up I need a wee!” Theon interrupted Robb which earned him a collective chuckle and a smack on the head from Jeyne.

 

“Ok cut to the chase,” he grinned and took a deep breath “Jon an I are getting married.”

 

For a second the whole table was silent but once the first moment of suprise was over everyone seemed to talk excitedly at the same time.

Congratulations and a lot of toasts were made and Sansa grabbed them both in a bone crushing hug

 

“I have to tell everyone at home!”

 

“D'you think mom will kill me for not telling her first?” Robb asked sheepishly.

 

“Arya will!” she answered with a laugh.

 

The night was so filled with utter and simple happiness that Robb felt like he could almost grasp it and he couldn't stop staring at the ring on his finger and Jons sparkling eyes for the whole time.

 

 


	39. Chapter 39

“Shouldn't you be at uni?” Jon asked between kisses.

 

“No lectures on Thursday mornings,” Robb answered and knotted his fingers in Jons hair “Shouldn't you be working?”

 

Jon groaned and cast a sideways glance at the half finished lounge chair but then pulled him closer on his lap “Can still do that later.”

 

Robb laughed in his mouth, caught his lower lip with his teeth and sealed their lips together again. He'd meant to leave after breakfast but spending the morning with Jon was just so much better than going back to his own place. Adjusting his position he started fiddling with the upper button of Jons flannel when someone clearing their throat caused them both to look up in the direction of the sound.

 

“Mum!” Robb exclaimed and scrambled into a standing position, straightening his shirt while Jon inconspicuously fixed the buttons Robb had managed to undo.

 

“Good morning.” Catelyn greated with an amused expression and approached her son “I do hope I'm not interrupting.”

 

Robb grinned as she kissed his cheek “ 'Course not.”

 

“Morning Mrs. Stark.” Jon said with an apologetic smile and scratched the back of his neck “Sorry for that.”

 

“Please, call me Catelyn,” she smiled warmly “now that we're to be family.”

 

Robbs eyebrows met his hairline “Sansa told you.”

 

“What did you expect,” Catelyn laughed and put her hands on his shoulders “you're engaged!” she hugged him close “I'm so proud of you.” stepping back she looked fondly at Jon “And I'm so happy for you two.”

 

Although a little hesitant she bent down and hugged him as well which made Robbs heart swell with love.

 

“Tea?”

 

“I'd love to.” Catelyn answered and they went to the small kitchenette together “Your father wanted to come as well this morning but they're having some trouble in the office at the moment, you know how it is.” she added as she sat down and crossed her legs.

 

Robb paused for a moment and looked at the box of teabags in his hand “He's alright with it, isn't he?” he asked and put the box on the table before taking the kettle from the stove.

 

Catelyn waited with her answer until he sat down next to Jon “Of course he is my dear,” she watched a reluctant smile appear on her sons features and he intertwined his hand with Jons “I know it wasn't easy in the beginning but he wants you to be happy, and so do I.”

 

Robb nodded as she poured some milk in her cup and stirred it slowly “Besides,” she added “we think you made a good choice.”

 

His face lit up with the brightest of all smiles and he looked at Jon who had an adorable blush creeping up his neck “Me too.”

 

 

 


	40. Chapter 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter quite a while ago and I simply forgot to post it :D I'm such a genius.  
> Hope you enjoy it!

“Did you let my mum in the workshop yesterday?” Robb asked over dinner the next day.

“Of course not. It must have been the ghost that lives in the shop and always moves stuff around.” Ygritte grinned at his pout “What, did she walk in on you?”

“Something like that.” Jon answered when Robb only shook his head and let his forehead drop on his shoulder.

“We need like a secret sign or something.” she snickered and stabbed a piece of tomato with her fork.

“What about simply not letting people in?” Robb remarked slightly annoyed.

“Oh sorry princess it's not my fault you two make out wherever you can!” she shot back mockingly and Robb felt the sudden urge to throw a bean at her. He was just about to return a snide remark and elbow Jon in the side for trying to hide his laughter instead of supporting him when his phone started ringing.

“Hang on,” Robb death-stared at Ygritte while he fished his phone from his back pocket “Hello?”

“No phones at dinner!” she called out with a laugh but Robb suddenly became serious.

“Bran, where are you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” his little brother answered hesitantly “Are you at home?”

“No I'm at Jons, why?”

“Can I come round?” Bran asked quickly.

“Yeah, sure I'll text you the adress...” before Robb could ask further questions the line clicked and he looked at his phone in bafflement.

“Everything ok?” Jon asked upon seeing his fiances confused expression.

“Bran asked if he can come round,” Robb answered and sent Bran his location “He sounded kind of stressed out.”

“Do you think he's in trouble?” Ygritte asked straightforwardly.

“Bran is not the type to get into trouble,” he retorted with a worried shrug “I hope he's alright.”

The answer arrived way sooner than either of them had expected. In the very second they heard a knock on the door Robb leapt to his feet while Jon and Ygritte mutually decided to hang back for now and give them some privacy, but the decision was undone quickly when Robb called for tissues and iodine from the hallway.  
“Christs sake, what happened?” Robb asked in shock upon taking in the various cuts and bruises littering his little brothers face and forearms before he ushered him inside the flat.

“Please don't tell mum.” Brans voice was small and he looked at him with pleading eyes.

“I won't, but you'll have to.” he said while he lead Bran to the living room where Jon and Ygritte were waiting.  
Robb motioned him to sit down across from Ygritte who was waiting with a first aid kit. After he had tentatively done so she smiled at him soaked a cotton but in iodine “I'm Ygritte and I'm going to be your nurse today.”

A smile tucked on his lips and he relaxed a little into the pillow behind him “I'm Bran.”

“Nice to meet you Bran.” she raised the cotton but and gently dabbed it along the cut on above his eyebrow. Bran hissed from the sting of the iodine and Robb and Jon exchanged a look.

“So,” Robb began when Ygritte had finished with the first cut and put a plaster on it “What happened? Did you get into a fight?”

“No,” his brother answered unassertively “Not exaxtly.”

“What do you mean not exactly? Is someone picking on you?” Robb didn't let him get away that easily.

Bran shifted uncomfortably and looked between Jon and Ygritte but before Robb could continue she said “Don't be shy you don't want to know what I patched that one up for.”

She nodded towards Jon who glared at her “Don't.”

“Just sayin'” Ygritte chuckled and winked at Bran who grinned but winced when he stretched a cut.

She continued her work on his face and the room became silent only interrupted by an occasional hiss or the sound of tape being ripped. Robb stood between her and Jon and looked at his brother expectantly. Jon could almost physically feel the agitation radiating off him so he tucked his fiances hand and nodded towards the armchair next to him.

'Sit down.' he mouthed and Robb pressed his lips together but eventually dropped onto the chair. “He doesn't need you towering over him like your father probably will do later.” Jon whispered into his ear and as much as Robb didn't like it he had to admit that he was right.  
Meanwhile Ygritte put a plaster over the last cut “That's it.” she said with a smile “All good?”

“Yeah.” Bran answered gratefully “Thank you so much.”

“No worries,” she waved it off “but you better tell your brother who did that.” she rose from the couch and began to collect the first aid kit. Once everything was packed away she left towards the kitchen and Jon followed her so Robb could have a moment alone with his brother.

“Do you remember I told you about this guy at school a couple of weeks back?” Bran asked him after the kitchen door had been securely closed.

“Sure.” his brother answered and waited for him to carry on but when he only dropped his gaze and knotted his hands in his lap the coin dropped.

“He did this?” Robb inquired a little harsher than he had intended.

“Yeah.” Bran answered quietly “I told him.”

Robb couldn't think of an answer and nervously carded a hand through his hair.

“Could you call mum for me please? I think I want to go home.” his brother asked before he had said anything. His face mirrored hurt and reject and Robb felt like the most rubbish big brother in the world when he dialed their mothers number. It wasn't easy to explain why Bran was with him at Jons house but in the end Cately didn't press the matter because she would find out soon enough anyway.  
Robb was more than glad that his parents house wasn't too far away because the silence between him and Bran was awkward at best. The minutes ticked by and he could hear Jon and Ygritte talking in the kitchen but Bran just sat in across from him and stared at his hands. What went on in his little brothers mind he could not tell and he knew from own experience how hard coming to terms with the own sexuality could be.  
When he heard a car pulling up in the backyard he rose from his seat “Ready?”

“Don't know.” Bran admitted but followed him to the door.

To say that Cately Stark was utterly shocked upon seeing her sons battered form was an understatement. Instantly she begun questioning him about what had happened but when Bran remained quiet she let him get in the car an turned to Robb.

“Do you know anything?”

“He'll have to tell you himself.” Robb answered in a measured tone “That's all I'm going to say.”

She nodded as if she had expected him to say that “I knew you two would stick together. But it was good that you took care of the cuts.”

“I didn't, it was Ygritte, Jons flatmate.”

“Well I'd like to thank her then before we leave.”

Robb nodded “Sure.”

Catelyn followed him inside and he knocked on the kitchen door before opening it. She entered the room and greeted Jon before turning to Ygritte

“You must be Ygritte?”

“Yes,” she smiled and rose from her chair “nice to meet you Misses Stark.”

“It is nice to meet you.” Catelyn returned the smile “I wanted to thank you for taking care of my boy.”

“No trouble whatsoever,” Ygritte waved it off “you're welcome.”

Cately nodded approvingly before saying good bye to the three and leaving them to take Bran home.

“Well,” Ygritte said with a yawn “I'll do the kitchen then.”

“No, you already did more than enough tonight. I'll do it.” Jon began and Robb was quick to add “We.”

“How very gentleman-like of you.” she grinned and stretched her arms above her head before leaving the kitchen but Jon didn't miss how she purposely closed the door behind her.

Robb leaned heavily against the kitchen counter “It's my fault, what happened to Bran.” he said after a beat of silence.

“How's that?” Jon asked while he put the stack of plates from his lap into the dishwasher.

“A couple of weeks ago he told me that he likes” he emphasised the word “a boy at school.”

“Oh.” Jon instantly understood “He's not out yet, is he?”

“No but, I encouraged him to speak to said boy about his feelings.”

“Yeah but that doesn't make it your fault that idiot decided to beat up your brother.” Jon reasoned but he sensed that Robbs distress didn't only arise from blaming himself for his brother getting hurt. He turned to face him and before he could say anything Robb had lowered himself onto Jons lap and wound his arms tightly around his shoulders.

“This is not only about your brother, is it?” Jon asked and gently stroked Robbs back.

“He's having a difficult time.” he mumbled against Jons shoulder before he raised his head to look at him “When I came out I had no support, my friends didn't discourage it but they were too busy with their own hormones and my parents thought it was a phase which would pass eventually. It took them years to accept it. I wanted it to be different for Bran but when we were alone I didn't know what to say.”

“Like you said, it's difficult.” Jon agreed reassuringly.

“When I was at college I was with my first real boyfriend,” Robb began and his lower lip trembled “some blokes picked on us at school but we ignored it but when we were at a party they got so drunk they decided to do more than just throw insults. In the weeks after that I doubted myself and my sexual orientation so much that my boyfriend broke up with me and I just felt horrible.” he finished with a long exhale “It's very important to me that Bran is feeling alright with himself and who he is.”

Jon felt a wave of emotion well up inside of him how deeply Robb cared for his brother. Every answer he could think of would sound trite so he decided for an answer which needed no words.  
Robb leaned into the kiss and he relished the secure feeling he had when confiding his worries to him.

“You are an amazing brother.” Jon whispered against Robbs lips and lightly carressed his hair. _And you would be an even more amazing father_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always welcome!  
> Love ya bye! -xx


	41. Driving Home For Christmas - Chris Rea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating for so long but this bloody RL was in the way.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the update:)

23.12.2015

 

The door fell shut but before turning away her eyes got caught by the sign under the doorbell.

 

Y. Wilde

J. Snow

 

She wondered how long it was going to stay like this. Even though she loved Robb and the way he made Jon smile she couldn't help but feel the tiny tuck of egoism on her heart when she thought about not living with Jon anymore.

Although her relationship with Tormund developed further as well and no two days before he'd started dropping hints of looking for a place together Ygritte didn't feel as ready for change as she thought she should be.

The supermarket wasn't far but the way took longer as it usually would mainly due to the weather, the sky had decided to drop tons of snow on the city and while Robb and Jon were busy with their Christmas tree she went to the shop to buy what they'd forgotten for the Christmas dinner. When she found herself surrounded by red lights her mind wandered again. Never in her life had she lived alone, not that it looked like she would be soon but still, the thought of living without Jon was equally strange. He was the one person she'd shared her whole life with, but life must go on as they say and she certainly wouldn't let the fear of change get in her or others way ever.

Ygritte shook her head. Not that anything had been settled, _get a grip_ , she thought, _don't let the girl in you panic._

Nothing was settled. Yet.

Tormund and her had talked about this and even before that she had agreed that she had to be prepared because surely she wouldn't be sharing the flat with Jon forever. Ygritte had agreed with Tormund that she would move out and thinking about it the thought of her name being replaced with Robbs didn't make her sad at all. After all, Robb and Jon were engaged, which was enough of a reason for her to give them the flat but also for more practical reasons like the already low kitchen counters and the bathroom.

The supermarket was packed with people doing last minute food shopping like her and she found herself constantly dodging people but she quickly found the few things she needed and before she knew it she was back in the car and on her way home.

The snow began to fall lightly again and the windows were a little fogged from her breath when she turned on the radio.

 

_I'm driving home for Christmas..._

 

A smile spread across her lips and she tapped a finger on the steering wheel. Until now Ygritte hadn't even realised it was Christmas tomorrow and how happy the thought of spending the day with her loved ones. A lot had changed in that year, Jon and her had spent their last Christmas on the couch, killing a bottle of wine and watching trashy films. This year they would have a proper dinner all together, Tormund, her, Robb and Jon.

Driving through the snow Ygritte understood that change had already happened, and that she loved it. A little more couldn't hurt.

She parked in the backyard and grinned again at the red and green fairy-lights Robb had put in the kitchen window. A proper girl he was sometimes, the Stark boy.

 

Ygritte opened the front door and even before she had finished unlacing her boots she heard the bickering in the living room.

 

“It's hanging to the side!” Robb exclaimed and crossed his arms over his chest

 

A huff came from underneath the christmas tree “Which side?”

 

“Left.”

 

Jon grumbled something untilligible and adjusted the screw “Better?”

 

“Robb,the tree is tipping towards you.” Ygritte remarked in passing on her way to the kitchen.

 

He rounded the tree once again and cocked his head “Ok, it needs to go a bit towards the kitchen.”

 

“For fucks sake, how hard can it be?”

 

“We've got a swearing tree.” Robb snickered and Jon flicked him the finger before adjusting the srew again “I think our tree is crooked.” Robb added after studying the tree for a moment longer.

 

“Seriously?” Jon sat up and glared at him “We've been doing this for the last 20 minutes and now figure out the tree is crooked?Why did I end up with this job again?”

 

“Because you're the one who can use a tool without accidently losing a finger.” he laughed and flopped down on the hardwood floor next to his fiancé.

 

“True but I'm fairly sure that adjusting a screw can't be beyond you.” Jon playfully showed his shoulder and then cast a glance at the christmas tree “Robb, that tree is definitely not standing straight.”

 

“I told you it's crooked.” he shrugged and tried to hide his grin when Jon shot him a look.

 

“If you say so.”

 

“I say so.”

 

Her phone screen lit up with a text from Tormund, stating that he was on his way and when she saw Robb and Jon kissing next to a very crooked Christmas tree she truly felt ready for something new.

 


	42. Elevator Song-Keaton Henderson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your lovely feedback!   
> Here comes more brooding...sorry not sorry ;)  
> Enjoy

The dipping matress next to him reached Robbs sleeping mind before he even registered he was awake.

He blinked hazily but subconsciously decided not to move. Shades of grey fuzzed into shape and he could clearly make out Jons blueish silhouette on the edge of the bed. The dark blue mingling with the artificial glow of the street light told of how early it still was, barely even dawn as Robb watched him glide to the floor and scoot over to the Yoga mat which had its permanent place between the bed and the wall.

Robb lay completely still and let his eyes rest comfortably on the scenery before him. It was something he had always liked to do, watching and observing without raising attention. When Jeyne had once asked why he would do it he'd simply answered: “It would ruin the moment if they knew.”

Like photographs in an album he'd always kept the scenes he'd witnessed with his own personal artists eye securely tucked away in his memory.

Jon let his head fall forward for a brief moment and Robb truly felt like taking a photograph. Bathed in the light hue of the ending night and with his hair shielding half his face from view it had almost dream-like character but as Jon carried on working against the spasticity in his legs Robb had to force a blink.

The beauty of that moment was gone forever but Robb treasured that he would never have to share it with anyone else. Although, the inevitable did not fail to worm its way into his mind. It would be better if there was nothing to watch.

_Denying means lying,_ that's what his mother had once said. It was true, Robb would lie to himself if he would deny that there were things Jons disability kept them from doing. The little things, the stupid little things which Robb sometimes missed more than he liked to admit. Walking down the street hand in hand, pressing each other up against a wall, raising a family together...

All these things haunted his mind in the hours spent alone in his flat, just before falling asleep or in random situations like in his kitchen, the knife from cutting vegetables abandoned on the counter and him staring out of his window and suddenly doubting everything. It were the moments like these were he felt like his life had stopped making sense and went in a direction he had never chosen. 

Waking up the next morning always had a bitter taste, the moon always cast darker shadows than the sun and he breathed in deeply and reminded himself of what he had. It were the nights after when he would kiss Jon harder and hold him tighter and his heart swelled with love each time they looked at each other. All of a sudden the dark thoughts would be drowned out by the pure feeling of being together, of being whole even in the most normal and boring situations. 

So why the doubt?

Robb couldn't stop asking himself that one question, even now, curled under the sheets and awake when he knew he shouldn't be. Deep inside he knew that at one point he would have to talk about it, but the courage to vocalise his most hidden thoughts had yet to be worked up. 

He hadn't even realised how much his thoughts had carried him away until he felt a tender hand resting against his cheek and a chaste kiss dancing over his lips. 

 

“Did I wake you?” 

 

“No.” Robb mumbled and scooted closer to the warm body next to him.

 

“Merry Christmas.” Jon whispered into his hair and kissed the crown of his head “I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 


	43. Arsonist's Lullaby - Hozier

Christmas kept them busy, their own little celebration with Ygritte and Tormund and on the days following the Starks had seemed to have made it their mission to ask as many questions as possible about the wedding.

Spending time with the family for Christmas was lovely but Jon couldn't help but notice how Robb grew distant towards him.

Robb felt eyes lingering on him and he knew that his efforts to cover up had failed.

Ygritte and Tormund had left for Scotland the day after Christmas, leaving them alone in the flat which would usually be a good thing but now Robbs thoghts seemed to become louder in the silence of the flat.

At night he lay awake next to Jon an listened to his even breaths, trying to solve the mess his mind was but again he failed. Worry gnawed his way through his mind, he knew, keeping it to himself was not helping the situation but like most people he was afraid of the risk he took with telling Jon.

A couple of days later the decision was taken from him.

"Robb what's the matter with you?"

There was no accusation in the question but still Robb felt taken aback "Nothing."

"I thought we agreed on being honest with each other." Jon said with slight disappointment and was about to turn and leave when Robb spoke again "Wait."

"You're right." Robb looked directly at him  "I think..." suddenly all his confidence left him and a lump formed in his throat. He swallowed hard and took a deep breath before speaking again "I think I need some time alone to think some things through."

Jons features froze but he held Robbs gaze without so much as blinking and silence so thick one could almost grasp it filled the space between them.

"So you want to..." Jon trailed off but Robb understood and he shook his head vehemently.

"No." he leaned foward to take Jons hand but the slightest movement made his fingers close around thin air. Robb leaned back again and felt his face falter.

"What do you want then?" Jons words never missed their target.

Robb debated his answer but couldn't come up with anything that did not make him sound like an idiot "I can't explain it."

"So you don't know?"

"I do but...I need come space, I don't feel alright with some things and I neet to sort that out."

Jons jaw twitched "I know what I want."

Robb felt the stab of rejection and carded a hand through his hair before he leaned closer to him again "I love you, Jon, please don't think I'm leaving you."

"Then why does it feel like it?"

Robb tried to stop himself but his hand wandered up to cup Jons cheek but he looked away "I told you, I know what I want. If you figure out what you want you know where to find me."

"Please, look at me."

Jon raised his gaze but the hardness he saw in it made Robb drop his hand "I think I should..."

"Yeah."

His legs were like lead when he made his way to the door and still Jons look seemed to pierce his back. He couldn't bring himself to look back, not for now.

Relief was what he sought but what came instead was sadness and anger about himself. _Congratulations, you may have just fucked up the best thing that ever happened to you._


	44. Underdog-Kasabian

New Years Eve had been a dull affair and after Christmas Break ended life caught up with Robb.

He had sent a Happy New Year text to Jon but never received an answer. After waiting for his phone to vibrate with a new text message for days he accepted that he now had to deal with the space he had wanted so desperately. You made your bed now lie in it.

Uni had barely started and he basically threw himself into work just to make his mind stop thinking for a couple of hours. The week flew past and before he even knew it it was Saturday afternoon. All work done and Winter showing its ugly side outside his window he found himself standing in the middle of the kitchen not knowing what to do with himself. His eyes fell on the list on his fridge, the final point added hastily with a black felt tip pen. The note pinned next to it only added to it _Went to get some breakfast. Love you_

Robb sighed and carded a hand through his hair “Fuck's sake.”

He turned on his heel and put the kettle on when suddenly his phone vibrated. For a few seconds his hand hovered over the device, unsure weather to check it or not. It could be anything, family, uni, phone company telling him he was running out of data.

Or Jon.

Annoyed with himself he shook his head and woke up the phone.

_Going out with the lads tonight, want to come along?_

 

Theon.

Well that was an anti-climax.

 

Robb debated wether to go or not.

 

_Sure._

 

Come on Stark, he thought to himself, give the brooding a break.

 

_Nine sharp at The Dornishman._

 

Getting ready was a more than welcome distraction and seeing Theon, Jon Umber and Thorren Karstark already waiting by the bar at the Pub even more so.

 

“What got your knickers in a twist, Stark?” Thorren asked and took a sip fro his drink.

 

“Don't ask.” Robb really didn't feel in the mood to talk about it.

 

Theon put down his glass and sighed dramatically “Don't worry mate, plenty more fish in the sea.”

 

“Fuck off, Theon.” he retorded which earned him a lopsided grin from his friend.

 

They sat down at a table in the corner and it didn't take long for Jon Umber, which some called the Greatjon for some reason, to spot a girl at the bar.

 

“She's well fit.” Thorren agreed and nodded approvingly.

 

“Gentlemen, the game's on.” Umber put down his glass and casually made his way to the bar.

 

“By tomorrow morning she's gonna know why they call him Greatjon.” Theon winked.

 

“Or even sooner than that.” Thorren snickered.

 

Robb shook his head “I'm gonna find the gents.”

 

“Mate, I really need some popcorn!”

 

He heard Thorren say before he rounded the corner to find the toilets. Robb could have guessed that looking to right whilst walking to the left wasn't very smart but every thought dropped from his head when the back he had just bumped into turned around.

 

“Sorry.” he managed to say.

 

“That's alright.” came the smooth reply.

 

Robb just continued to stare at the man in front of him.

 

“I'm Satin, by the way.” blue eyes sparkled at him from underneath long black lashes.

 

“Robb.” his tongue felt like lead as he watched a stray of curly black hair fall over his opposites forehead.

 

In the meantime Theon and Thorren finished a second drink and just after Umber had managed to leave the pub with the girl on tow Theon glanced at his watch.

 

“Christ what is Robb doing?”

 

“Perhaps he's found himself something for the night as well.”

 

“He's still with Snow you half-wit.” Theon retorted and looked around.

 

“Yeah true.”

 

Theon got up and scanned the room once more before he started making his way towards the restrooms.

He stopped dead in his track after rounding the corner

 

“Robb what the fuck?”

 

 


	45. With Eyes Wide Open-In Flames

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is what happens when I've got spare time, fetch a tissue box ladies and gentlemen and don't throw it in my face after reading.

Robbs eyes burst open and he whirled around. Theon stared at him in disbelief and for a brief moment none of them moved but then Robb shuffled backwards, away from Satin whoms face had been merely inches apart from his and pushed past Theon who gave the rather confused Satin a nasty look before he followed Robb. Thorren shot him a look but Theon gestured him to stay where he was.

Once outside he grabbed Robbs wrist so they stood face to face.

 

“Mate, what the fuck?”

 

Robb stared back at him with wide eyes and lips slightly parted.

 

“Did you...?” Theon asked but there was no need for Robb to answer , the expression of guilt and shame on his face was almost ridiculously obvious. Theon slowly cocked his head and exhaled audibly “But why?”

 

“I don't know.” Robb answered quietly.

 

“And why for heavens sake him?” Theon released his wrist and gestured towards the door.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You didn't know?” Theon looked around and lowered his voice “Because he's a fucking hooker, Robb, that's why.”

 

“I,” Robb gazed back at Theon as if he'd been struck by lightning “I have to go.”

 

Theon briefly tried to hold him back but then dropped his hands and watched his best friend hurry away.

 

When the appartment door fell into lock behind him Robb had already forgotten how he had managed to get home.

He leaned against the solid wood and screwed his eyes shut.

Blurred images flashed behind his lids.

 

Eyes fluttering shut.

Hands grabbing his neck.

Breaths mingling.

Lips pressing against his own.

 

 

“Fuck!” his breath was heavy and his hands balled into fists. His heart beat so hard he felt like his chest would burst open and release all the guilt and pain until nothing was left but and empty cave.

His eyes fell on the silver band on his ring finger and he bit his lip hard before tearing it off. The edges dug into his palm when he balled his hand around it and put it against his forehead.

_What have I done?_

All his relationships had ended this way, only lacking the ring, but there had always been the point where fear would win over love and he would fuck up and run away. He had hoped, almost prayed that things with Jon would be different but another mans tongue in his mouth had destroyed the last bit of hope inside him. 

The images of the night once again flared up and he felt a sudden sting at the back of his eyes.

 

Knock knock. 

 

Robb had been deep in thought and the sudden noise behind his back made him whirl around. 

 

“Robb, it's me.”

 

Hearing that voice made his stomach clench so hard he felt sick. 

 

“I acted like a bitch the other day, can we talk?”

He wasn't able to form words, his body was frozen and he stared at the door. 

 

“I can hear you breathing, come on just open the door.” 

 

Unconciously his hand came to rest against the door and he dropped his head “Please go.”

 

The silence from the other side of the door was a short lived relief “We can talk about this Robb, just let me in.”

 

“Jon, just go.” he cursed his voice for quivering.

 

“Are you alright?” he heard him moving closer to the door “I'm starting to get worried, please.”

 

“No.”

 

“Yes.”

 

Robb bit his lip so hard he felt like he would soon draw blood and turned the lock. Jons eyes went wide when he saw him

 

“What happened, are you alright?” 

 

The concern in Jons voice cut through him like a knife and he shook his head vehemently “I fucked up.”

 

Jons eyebrows drew together in worry “Hey,” he reached out to take Robbs hand “look at me, alright? What's wrong?”

 

“No!” he took a step bakwards “Just go, leave and don't come back. I don't deserve you.”

 

“Heavens sake, Robb, what are you talking about? Your not making any sense!” 

 

“I,” a single tear rolled down his cheek “I kissed someone else tonight.”

 

Jons face faltered the second the words left Robbs mouth and his brows drew together tigthly before swallowed thickly “Why?” he asked coarsely. 

 

Robb pressed his lips together and shrugged helplessly “I don't know.” he paused and looked at his fiances heartbroken expression “I love you.”

 

“Then why the fuck did you do it?” Jons eyes glowed like coals even though they shone with tears and for the first time since they met Robb felt intimidated. 

 

“I'm not lying when I say I don't know.” he answered with a heavy air of defeat “It always happened, I can't help fucking up my relationships.”

 

“You think that's an excuse?” Jon shot back angrily “Time to think is best spent with someone elses tongue in your mouth? Doesn't the term engagement mean anything to you?”

 

There was so much venom in this single statement that Robb had to blink a couple of times but he knew he deserved it “Jon please, I love you.”

 

“I love you too, Robb, more than anything!” never before had someone shouted it in Robbs face “But how can I? You push me away and run from me over and over again! How can I love you if our love doesn't matter to you?” angry tears spilled and Robb had to restrain himself from moving closer towards him. 

 

“I don't have the answer.” 

 

“That's what I thought.” Jon said finally and looked him deeply in the eyes before he turned around and wheeled out of the door.

 


	46. Heathens-Twenty One Pilots

“Back already?” Ygrittes head poked out of the kitchen door.

 

“Yeah.” Jon answered courtly and let the door fall closed behind him.

 

She cocked her head “What did he say then?”

 

Jon looked up and took a long breath before answering “Robb kissed another man.”

 

“What?” plates clattered in the kitchen and a second later she rounded the corner, wiping her hands on a teatowel “No way!”

Jon just nodded while she finished drying her hands and then threw the towel over her shoulder “So, are you...?”

 

He shrugged in answer and averted his gaze “Feels like it,” Jon paused and drew his brows together “sorry 'gritte but I don't really feel like talking right now, is that alright?”

 

“Sure.” she leaned against the doorframe and watched him wheel towards his bedroom door.

 

It was dark in Jons bedroom but he couldn't be bothered to turn the lights on. For a couple of moments he only stared in the into the darkness, the events of the night flaring up in his mind and he leaned his forehead against his folded hands.

Robb telling him that he had kissed someone else had hit him like a punch but it was only now that he understood how betrayed he felt. Over the time he had learned that Robb had trouble dealing with his fear of commitment but Jon had been patient with him, sometimes more sometimes less but in the end he had never used it against him.

_...not the only thing crippling you... _

Jon willed down the memory of Robb spitting that word in his face during their first real fight, straightened up and finally turned the lights on. He shed his clothes and once the steam of the shower filled the air around him he let his head fall back against the tiled wall. The hot spray helped easing the tension building in his shoulders but the almost phyiscal pain of betrayal still stung in his chest and his mind completely failed at trying to answer the question why. What had he done wrong to make Robb run, again? As frustrating as it was, he couldn't stop thinking about it. 

_ Perhaps he just liked the idea of not having to crouch before kissing... _

Jon resisted the urge to grit his teeth. He had spent enough time in therapy to know that this was nothing but a nasty fucker called inferiority complex but it never ceased to an opportunity to drag him down. 

The tears came, and they came hard. 

After what seemed like an eternity he dragged himself out of the shower and back to the bedroom . His mind was playing tricks on him, Jon knew but when he transferred onto the bed his body felt heavier than normal.

 

 

Some time after she had heard the shower stop Ygritte knocked on his door.

 

“Come in.”

 

The door swung open slowly and and revealed Ygritte, standing in the doorway with a bottle of wine, two glasses and a lopsided grin on her face.

Jon huffed out a laugh when she flopped down on the bed across from him and handed him a glass.

 

She cut him off just about when he was about to speak “Don't give me shit, your eyes are red.”

 

“I gave him a fucking ring, Ygritte.” he said with his eyes fixed on nothing in particular.

 

“I know.” her voice was soft and she swirled the wine in her glass before taking a long sip.

 

“He wasn't even wearing it anymore.”

 

“Seriously?” it was hard for her to believe that the Robb she knew would do that.

 

Jon nodded and worried his lip with his teeth “It's like he's suddenly stopped caring about us and never told me why.”

 

“Fuck knows.”

 

“What if I did something and I just didn't notice...”

 

“Hold on,” she cut him off “it's not your fault that he decided to mess around with another guy!”

 

“But what if it is.” Jons voice was small.

 

“It's not!” Ygritte said decidedly and looked him in the eye “Stop thinking!” her index finger tapped against his forehead and he gave her a confused look.

 

“You're strange sometimes.”

 

“I know.” she said with slight amusement.

They spent the evening on Jons bed, talking and watching films and when Jon fell asleep on her shoulder she carded her hand through his locks and wondered.

Robb and her had always gotten along really well but now she felt like he had completely misjudged him.

Slowly she moved to lie down without waking Jon who just grumbled when she tucked the covers.

The next morning she woke up late and found the bed next to her empty. The flat was quiet so she got up and padded to the kitchen where she found Jon staring at the Wintertown United mug on the dishrack with a hand clasped over his mouth.

 

“You okay?” she asked after coming to a halt next to him.

 

Jon reached out, took the mug from the dishrack and turned it between his palms “It's Robbs mug.” the anger was obvious in his voice and Ygritte could see his lips tighten before he raised his arm and the mug smashed into a thousand little pieces on the tiled floor

“The fucker.”

 


	47. Skinny Love-Birdy

Days blended into each other, the weather was as bleak as his thoughts and Robb mechanically followed his daily tasks. He felt like shit because he had potentially ended his engagement and now even more so because the cold from hell had built its nest in his nose.

Karma, he reckoned.

It felt like he was trapped in some sort of shitty novel, he lay awake at night, woke up way before his alarm because he missed Jon so much it hurt, yearned for his touch and the reassurance of the familiar body next to him. There were so many little bits and pieces Jon had left in his flat that he had constant reminders of his failure all almost everywhere he looked. The jumper in his wardrobe he had stumbled upon one morning, the note on his fridge, the Truman Capote novel on the armrest of the couch.

The ring.

It still sat on the side table next to the bowl for his keys where he'd left it that fateful Saturday night but he didn't know where else to put it. He almost deemed its place fitting in the most cruelly ironic way, in the hallway next to the keys, put on hold same as relationship, in abeyance with no prospect of change. He had hesitated to call Jon a couple of days earlier and after wished that he hadn't. It hadn't been like he expected, no anger, no insult, not even accusing silence had reached him from the other end.

_Just leave it._

A single statement spoken spoken so coldly that Robb had shivered involunantarily and hung up immediately. It hurt and felt so right at the same time, he knew he had pushed too far with his actions and now he would have to pay for it. The snifle that broke through the silence of his bedroom wasn't owed to his cold. 

Robbs thoughts drifted to Jon and his mouth twisted with sudden anger about himself. 

_You hurt him and now you're here, feeling fucking sorry for yourself. Selfish idiot._

In that moment he would have given everything to know what Jon was feeling, if he was angry or sad or thinking about him at all. Missing him? At that moment Robb chose to doubt it.

When he had confessed what he had done Jon had turned to steel in front of his eyes, cold and hard and unyielding. Robb had always envied him for his confidence, even though he had to look up to meet peoples eyes Jon carried an energy and presence that most people couldn't muster when standing up straight. It had been the first thing he had noticed when he had stumbled in the workshop that afternoon, the look which felt like it went straight to his soul making him feel bare but at the same time drawn to the other man beyond words.

Robb watched as the first rays of sunligh peaked through the skylight and he dragged himself out of bed and into the bathroom to take a shower. When he wiped the steam off the mirror he saw his reflection, but not himself. He saw a man who had hurt the one person he loved most and still dwelled in self pity, who had nothing better to do than feel sorry for himself when he should be with Jon and try to solve the mess he had created in both their lives. Like a flame was lit inside of him he got dressed and set out for the only place where he was supposed to be right now. His mountainbike clattered as he leaned it carelessly against the brick wall and then pushed the back door. A sense of deja-vu hit him when he found Jon in almost the same position as he had at their first meeting, up on a dinner table with sand paper in his hand but this time there was no positive thrill radiating through his body, rather ice cold fear and the sudden urge to back out.

He didn't move from his spot by the door and neither did Jon, they just stared at each other for a long few heartbeats.

 

“What are you doing here?” Jons voice cut through the silence.

 

“I know I fucked up and that you probably don't  want to see me,” he begun with a quivering voice “believe me, I know I do. I would give everything to turn back time but I can't. I hurt you and the only thing I thought about was myself but you are so much more than me, I was so busy talking shit about not knowing what I wanted that I didn't see how much I want you, only you. The only thing I can do is ask you to forgive me because I love you Jon, more than anyone else in the world. Please let me come to you and fix all this mess.” he cursed his cold for making his voice sound scratchy where he wanted to shout it out. 

 

They were only a couple of feet away from each other but no distance had ever felt further to Robb. He looked at Jon and never before had he seen him look so lost. 

 

“I can't,” Jons voice was tight with tears “not yet.”

 

It was like all the air had disappeared from Robbs lungs but he took a few stumbling steps forward, almost closing the space between them but still keeping a little distance

 

“Please don't do this.” he whispered and his hand brushed Jons.

 

“If you love me give me time.” he briefly intertwined his fingers with Robbs before dropping his hand again “Please Robb, leave. For now.” 

 

Robb felt tears prickling in his eyes and clouding his vision as he took a step backwards, his hand seemed to burn where Jon had touched him and they shared a long look. 

 

“I'll wait,” Robb stated with a tear rolling down his cheek “no matter how long.”

 

 


	48. I Say A Little Prayer-Aretha Franklin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so so much for all the great feedback!!! :)  
>  I'm only updating that much because I'm on holiday and finally have some time to write so I'm trying to get on with the story as far as I can.

 

_Five minutes with you and you managed to pass me your cold. Thx Robb...not_

 

Robb stared at his phone in confusion.

When he'd read the text he'd almost dropped his phone,he hadn't seen or heard from Jon since their conversation in the shop, well apart from a rather awkward almost meeting at Tesco which Robb had only managed to prevent by hiding behind a shelf, but apart from that there had been nothing but radio silence. Until now, that was.

Though he was still rather confused a grin tucked at his lips, the text was so classically Jon that he was about to type in some ironic answer before he remembered that they still weren't talking and he should probably leave the irony for a while. The memory of Jons lost look was still fresh and pushing it seemed an absolutely awful idea right now.

He put his phone back in his pocket and suddenly an idea shot thorugh his head. For a moment he stayed where he was, an impish look spreading on his face while he debated his thought but then he got up and went to the fridge. He rummaged through the shelves of the small freezer attached to to it until he spotted a blue tupperware box in the corner and grinned triumphantly. Quickly he put it in a plastic bag and grabbed his jacket from the coatrack before leaving the flat.

Although the way was well familiar he felt strange going back so soon after what had happened. No fifteen minutes later he stood where he had stood hundreds of times before, the plastic bag in one hand and the other knocking on the door.

It swung open after a short moment, revealing Jon who looked slightly mirserable and equally surprised “Hi?”

 

Robb didn't answer but held out the plastic bag “My mums chicken soup, best remedy for a cold on this side of the country.”

 

“Uh, thanks.” Jon looked like he still wasn't having it but took the bag and watched Robb nod stiffly before turning on his heel and hurrying across the yard.

He followed him with his eyes until Robb had rounded the corner and let let the door fall closed again before putting the bag in his lap to return to the living room.

 

“Who was it?” Ygritte asked from the desk where she was brooding over the taxes for the shop.

 

“Robb,” Jon answered, still a little puzzled and she raised an eyebrow “he brought soup.”

 

“That's original,” she cackled “really, I'm not getting that man.”

 

“Do you think I do?”

 

Ygritte chuckled again but her face turned a shade more serious when she mustered him “It's alright that I'm going up to Thurso to see Tormunds family, yeah?”

 

“Sure, why not?”

 

“I just think you should go and see a doctor for that cold.”

 

“Ygritte...” he said with slight annyoance but she held up her finger to silence him.

 

“I know you don't want to hear it but I'd rather not get a call that you're down with bronchitis or some other shit because you didn't take care of yourself.”

“You're exaggerating.” he retorted flatly and Ygritte gave him a meaningful look.

 

“I know you. Take it easy.”

 

Jon looked to the side, still slightly annoyed but he knew she was right although he didn't like to admit it.

 

“Stop pouting, you.” she poked his shoulder with her index finger.

 

“I'm not.” he grumbled in return.

 

“Thinking about Robb?” Ygritte looked at him enquiringly and he hummed in agreement “You miss him?” she asked further.

 

“Yeah.” Jon knotted his fingers together.

 

“Ready to forgive him?”

 

“Is this an interrogation or what?” he asked jokingly which earned him a huff.

 

“You know what I mean.”

 

“Yeah, and I'd rater not answer.”


	49. Winter Song-Sara Bareilles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cami, enjoy ;)

-Did the soup help?-

-No.-

_You're crossing a line,you're crossing a line,you're crossing a line...._

The key in Robbs hand seemed to weigh a ton.

Slowly he turned it in the lock and stepped into the flat “Jon?”

He poked his head into the living room and Jons head whipped around and he looked at Robb from the couch with eyes big as saucers.

“You look miserable.” Robb said after mustering him.

“Thanks Captain Obvious, I wouldn't have guessed.” Jon deadpanned “How did you get in here?”

“You gave me a key, remember?”

“I regret that now.”

“I know you don't mean it.”

“You gave me a fucking Zombie virus,” Jon glared at him “I think I do.”

“And Ygritte sought refuge from patient X somewhere?”

Robb seemed to shift his weight constantly.

“She's in Thurso with Tormund.”

“You okay though?”

“Couple more hours and I'll eat your face.”

“You've got every right to.”

“True.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

“You don't have to.” it sounded more hopeful than he'd intended.

“God when did this become complicated?” Robb shrugged helplessly.

“Doesn't have to be,” Jon took his hand and pulled him down onto the couch “I missed you.” he stated and looked him straight in the eye “Easy.”

“Why do you always say the right things.”

“As if.”

He glared “All I've got to say is that you look like grumpy cat sometimes. “

“I don't.”

Robbs face split into a wide grin “You do, right now you do!”

“No.”

He nodded and laughed into his hand and the tension in the room seemed to melt away completely. We are a strange species indeed, us humans, we laugh in the upmost bizarre situations and it solves everything without a single word being said. Robb was more at ease than he had been in a long time when he saw Jon smile and chuckle softly, but it was replaced by worry when he watched him cough weakly a couple of times and obviously having trouble catching his breath after.

“You okay?”

Jon nodded before answering “I just need to lie back,” he paused in favour of air “makes it easier to breathe.”

“Okay.” Robb quickly changed places on the couch and suppported the other mans shoulders until he lay flat with the back of his head on Robbs thigh, like Jon had once done it with him.

“Better?” Robb asked with slight concern but he could already see his breaths becoming deeper.

“Yeah, thank you.” he nodded again “Sorry about that.”

“That's alright.” his fingers tentatively carded through Jons locks.

“I have to tell you something though.” Jon said deathly serious.

“Yeah?” he asked carefully.

“I broke your Wintertown mug.”

“That's alright.” Robb huffed out a laugh and shook his head at Jons mischievous grin “You're enjoying this way too much.

“So?” he raised an eyebrow“I felt like breaking your face but I could only grab hold of the mug.”

“Thanks for not breaking my face.”

“I like your face.” Jon still smiled but his voice was soft and Robb felt like loosing himself in his brown orbs.

“I like yours too.” Robb blinked lazily before asking almost shily “Can I kiss you?”

“The question is not if you can but if you want,” he deadpanned “I'm virus galore.”

“It's my virus, I don't care.”

Robb leaned forward until their lips met almost carefully and the kiss was as innocent as their first, lips moving in synchronised motion but nothing else. Jons lashes brushed over his cheeks and he nuzzled their noses together with his eyes still closed.

_What if something happend to you and I wouldn't be able to care of the kid because of my body?_

Out of the blue remembered Jons words “I,” wonder crossed Robbs features and he sat back up“I think I get it now!”

“What?”

“What you said when we were in Brighton.” Robb answered quickly.

“And what's that?”

“When I asked you why you don't want to have children you said that if something happened to me and you wouldn't be able to take care of the kid because of your body, and I didn't get it back then, but now I do.” he exclaimed.

“You lost me somewhere.” Jon narrowed his eyes in slight confusion and motioned his hand between him and Robb.

“Virus, Jon.” he began “for me it was three day of stuffy nose and just generally slight shittiness but for you it's straight down proper cold.”

“Sorry that you had to find out this way.”

“No, no” Robb replied hastily “that's not what I mean. I didn't get it because how could I, I never asked.”

“I could have told you.”

He sighed “No, it was my job to ask but I didn't.”

“There are a lot of things you don't know.” Jon answered thoughtfully “To be honest I was glad you didn't ask.”

“How come?”

“I was afraid that,” he shrugged almost apologetically “that it would change the way you look at me if you knew. “

“It wouldn't have.” Robb quickly reassured him but he could still feel Jons doubt.

“You say that now.”

“It's because you never complain.” he said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world but it only earned him an even more confused look

“What?”

“It's true, how many times have I been sitting here moaning about the most useless shit while you have a real reason but you never do.”

“There's no point.”

“What's the point of complaining about my professor?

“Your're right, the fact that spending five minutes with you and your cold throws me over because I only have half a spleen left and that it doesn't exactly lower the existing risk of chest infection because I can't cough properly would be a reason, but Robb, nothing of that is going to change, ever. Your professors may change but my back won't heal, so why waste words over it?”

“Fuck's sake, I'm an idiot.” Robb face-palmed but Jon shook his head and took his hand in his

“No, no you're not. I'm glad that you don't know what I'm talking about, no one should, but there's nothing you or me can do about it. ”

“I can try,” he said softly “all you have to do is be honest with me. Don't hide it from me, I won't run away.”

“You ran away because of less.”

Robb suddenly felt taken aback and it showed him that Jon was still hurt by his actions “I know.” he admitted “and I still feel like hitting myself in the face for doing it.”

“I could get that arranged for you.” Jon retortet with a flash in his eye.

“I'll take a pass on that,” he said “and I still feel like an ignorant idiot.”

“You're not, at least not ignorant. Could you give me a hand up?”

“Sure.”

He rose from the couch and and Jon took hold his offered hand to pull himself up but as soon as he was sitting upright his abs spasmed, forcing out an audible breath.

“Hey,” he put a careful hand on Jons shoulder “You're not okay, what is it?”

“Spasm,” he rasped “couldn't really stretch the last couple of days.”

“Did you see a doctor?”

“This morning.”

“What did he say?”

“Pills and rest.”

“I can help with one of them,” Robb said quietly and gently brushed his boyfriends hair back. Up until then he hadn't noticed how exhausted Jon looked but now it seemed like lines and dark circles were carved into his face “Come here.

Robb crouched next to the couch and nuzzled Jons cheek with nose before he put an arm around his shoulders wound the other one underneath his knees. Careful not to jostle too much Robb lifted him up and just held him close for a few heartbeats before making his way to the bedroom. He gently lay Jon down on the bed who had a hand clasped over his eyes.

“You shouldn't have to deal with this.” he whispered bitterly.

“It's part of you.”

“I wish it wasn't.”

Robb worried his lip with his teeth and then reached out to pry Jons hand away from his eyes.

What looked back at him was shame and fear through a curtain of tears. Robb quickly lay down next to him and wrapped his arms around the other man to pull him close.

“Let it go,” he whispered into Jons hair who had buried his face in Robbs shoulder “for once, allow yourself a weakness, I'm here.”

Those few words were all it took for a stifled sob to fall from Jons lips and Robb kissed the crown of his head.

“My back hurts so much, Robb.”

Robb held him closer while he cried into his shoulder and whispered sweet nonsense in Jons ear.

For the first time in their relationship Robb felt thrown off guard, he already knew that Jon was hesitant to let Robb come close to him but only now he saw how much he had truly kept locked away all this time. Most nights he fell asleep in Jons arms because he loved the feeling of being held, leaned on him because it made him feel safe and grounded. Now it was the other way around and Robb cringed internally at how fragile Jons body felt in his arms.


	50. Come Away With Me-Norah Jones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't even tell you how grateful I am for all your feedback, your comments are my bread and butter!  
> Love you guys :)

The next morning came with raindrops drumming against the windows and black curls tickling his nose . Robb blinked his eyes open but lay still, only turned his head towards the mass of fluff on his shoulder. The events of the previous evening were still present in his mind but for now he was completely content with the warm feeling of waking up next to Jon, or underneath him, rather. His boyfriends head was on his chest and his arm draped over Robbs body so he had no chance to move even if he wanted to.

He slowly closed and opened his eyes again as if to reassure himself that this was really happening. The light grey walls, the familiar smell of the sheets and the languid feeling of home filled him and he turned his head back towards Jon and nuzzled the crown of his head with his nose. A smile tucked at his lips when Jon shifted a little with a content sigh falling from his lips.

 

“Good morning.” Robb whispered “Feeling better?”

 

Jon only grumbled in response, nuzzled closer to him and lazily moved his palm up and down Robbs waist.

The latter grinned at the non-verbal answer, it had never failed to amuse him how Jon basically couldn't function before the first cup of coffee. Although he didn't really feel like it he pushed Jons arm to the side and snuck out from underneath the covers, a chill hitting him instantly. He turned around to see him tuck the covers back around him

 

“Nice to see you already miss me.” Robb said ironically and brushed Jons nose with the tip of his index finger.

 

“Shove it, Stark.”

 

Jons voice was muffled by the comforter but still Robb couldn't help but laugh. All this felt so absurtly normal and comfortable that it was an almost strange feeling after all that had happened.

The feeling didn't leave him when he stood in the kitchen, watching the pouring rain outside while he waited for the coffee machine to finish brewing and he leaned against the counter like he always had.

This simple happiness about things being like they had always been,still  Robb couldn't shake off the feeling that it would be short-lived. Surely things were looking better than they had before but, he reprimanded himself, it would be the greatest mistake to forget that he had hurt Jon with his actions. Nothing was resolved yet although their conversation had helped with getting to the bottom of it. It was only now that Robb saw that their communication had been truly awful at times, not least owed to his own sometimes almost blatant ignorance.

 

“You don't look like a complete zombie this morning.” Robb uttered with a barely concealed smile when he returned to the bedroom.

 

“Cheers.” Jon glared at him with fake anger and then took the offered cup from him.

 

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, sipping their coffee with the sound of the raindrops filling the space between them.

 

“I,” Jon finally spoke and Robb braced himself for the fallout to come “I'm sorry for yesterday.”

 

Robbs hand froze mid air and he looked baffled “What?”

 

“I didn't mean to empty out all that emotional shit on you.”

 

“Oh shut up!”

 

Jons eyebrows almost met his hairline.

 

“No!” Robb put his mug aside “I didn't mean it like that. I meant that there's no need to be sorry for anything.” he added softly “empty out as much shit as you want.”

 

“Okay, hold on,” Jon raised his hand and looked at him “we are not going to do this, not knowing what we can and can't say to each other. Let's just carry on like we started off, okay? No fumbling for words, if you want to say something, say it, period.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Okay.”

 

None of them spoke for a little while though.

 

“What did you do with the ring?”

 

Robb froze for a second.“It's,”  _He had to ask at some point you silly tosser, now get a grip_ “in my flat. I left it on the table.”

 

“Why did you take it off in the first place?” there was no accusation on Jons voice.

 

“After everything that happened on that night it just felt wrong, I mean I...” the words caught in his throat and he had to swallow a couple of times before continuing “I kissed someone who wasn't you.”

 

He took Robbs hand “Do you think I would have broken up with you because of that?”

 

He was striken and his eyes met with Jons, unable to form words he just looked at his boyfriend.

 

“You fucked up Robb. Everyone does from time to time.”

 

Still, Robb couldn't really say anything so he just carried on looking like a deer in the headlights.

 

“Do you really think that it would be enough to throw everything away?”

 

“No,” he finally managed to say “but I would still understand it though.”

 

“You don't get it, do you?” Jon inquired “I love you! It takes more to scare me away.” his hand came up to rest on Robbs neck, his fingertips playing with the curls in the nape of his neck and then Jon pulled him close, their lips meeting in the first proper kiss since the night in the pub. 

Although they knew every inch of each other, every habit and preference it was a new beginning, something beyond what their relationship had been up to now. 

From now on they would have a deeper understanding for each other, both of them had laid themselves bare for each other and now they had reached a new kind of love for each other. 

To be willing to live with and love your partners flaws is the greatest achievement in a relationship, without sympathy there can be no love. 

 

“You know what helps best against cold? Even better then my mums soup?” Robb mumbled against the other man's lips after they'd broken their kiss. 

 

“Hmh?” Jon hummed and leaned a little closer. 

 

“A hot bath with an extraordinarily attractive fiancé.”

 

“What if I only have one of those?”

 

They both laughed, and it was an honest laugh. All things clear up with time but some things are best solved with shared humor.

Things felt at ease again, there was no tension, no insecurity between them. Slowly but steadily, things were mending together again. 

 

 

 


	51. Crushing Limbs-Anni Rossi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First my characters, now me. Blame my cold for this chapter :D  
> Enjoy my lovelies.

They spent the rest of the morning like in the most corny, romantic novel an author could come up with and it felt like exactly what they had needed.

Robb smiled to himself. His slightly gruff, sarcastic fiancé had just made the cutest, most content sound when Robb had quietly said his name after coming back from the bathroom and finding him fast asleep on the sofa.

For a little while he didn't quite know what to do with himself so he went to the kitchen and put the kettle on. His thoughts wandered and he curled his fingers around the steaming mug. A lot had happened in the last weeks and he could still barely believe his luck that Jon hadn't broken up with him on the spot.

After Robb had finished his tea he checked the fridge and made a mental list of what he would need to pick up from the store. Another wise thing his mother had told him: When you're not feeling good you need feelgood-food.

He left a note on the coffee-table and headed outside. Winter was in full swing so he decided to take the bus to the supermarket, it was warm and froutsy and he quickly regretted wearing his thick scarf.

The supermarket was rather busy since it was a Saturday and Robb browsed through the shelves. He ended up with more tea, chocolate Digestives, a bag of tealights and a small bunch of red freesia which he knew Jon liked but would never admit it.

The aisles were crowded so he didn't see the woman walking straight towards him.

 

"Robb!"

 

"Mum, hi!" he whirled around tried to hide his suprise and sound pleased.

 

"How are you? And where have you been," she asked without waiting for an answer "we barely even saw you since Christmas!"

 

"Sorry I was...busy." Robb added evasively. He really didn't feel like explaining everything that happened whilst standing between detergent and toast.

 

"How are things  with Jon?"

 

"Good."

 

The look on his mothers face told that she knew something was going on but she didn't ask "Are you in a hurry?"

 

"No, no it's just Jons down with cold and I'm doing some feelgood-food shopping." Robb answered and gestured towards the items in his basket.

 

"Oh, then don't let me keep you!" she exclaimed with a smile "go and be a good fiance and perhaps you'll be a good son and call us sometime?"

 

"Sure." Robb grinned sheepishly and watched his mother walk towards the checkout.

Wether she noticed that the ring was missing or not he didn't know but he was sure that she knew something was going on. He payed for his things and headed towards the bus stop to quickly drop by at his flat before returning to Jon.

It seemed to get colder and colder throughout the day and Robb could barely feel his fingertips when he fumbled with the lock. Quickly he shed his coat and rubbed  his palms against each other to get some warmth back into his hands.

Light shone through the gap under the door he noticed as he gathered the bags.

 

"Hey look, it's alive." Robb couldn't deny himself the comment upon finding Jon sorting  papers on the desk.

 

"Barely," came the dramatic answer "nothing worse than waking up alone." he approached Robb and pulled him on his lap to kiss him.

 

"But I brought food." he mumbled against Jons lips, relishing the feeling of closeness "I ventured out there, in the cold, at the risk of my life."

 

"I'm gonna warm you back up."

 

Jons hand found his but when he intertwined their fingers his hand froze and he looked at Robbs hand "You..."

 

"Is that alright?" insecurity was prominent in his voice.

 

"Of course it is." Jon whispered and stroked the silver band on Robbs ring finger with the pad of his thumb  "Everything is alright."

 

There was no question between them anymore, no chaste kisses asking for consent and forgiveness when he pushed Jon down on the couch and hovered above him like he had done so many times before. Passion burned between them, pulled them towards each other like magnets and it was like a dance they both knew by heart but still, it was different. They pushed harder and held closer, _You never realise what you truly have until you don't have it anymore_ , bloody cliche that was but true, Robb begun to understand. Moments like these, Jons head on his shoulder and his index finger tracing the delicate line of Robbs collarbone, nothing but comfortable silence and the afterglow, invisible but as real as the back of his hand, surrounding them.

 

"I hate doing nothing.” Jon mumbled against his shoulder.

 

And this. This was what made it perfect and Robb couldn't help the laugh that escaped his lips.

 

"I wouldn't call that nothing." he retorted impishly.

 

"No," Jon chuckled and propped his head up on his hand "I mean not working."

 

Robb hummed "Just do some easy stuff then?"

 

 Jon shook his head “It's too early.” he already knew what Robb was about to ask before he finished speaking.

 

“Why that?"

 

 He hesitated for a heartbeat”I should avoid the dust and all for the next couple of days, at least until the cold is gone. It only increases the risk of developing pneumonia which is the, by the way, the number one cause of death for people with SCI so, I'd rather avoid it in the future.”

 

Robb swallowed “Wow.”

 

"You said you wanted honesty."

 

"No, I mean, yeah, I did. And that's good." he stuttered.

 

“It's not as bad as it sounds, Robb.” Jon retorted softly after taking in his boyfriends surprised features.

 

“No,” he sat up and blinked at Jon “I think it's exactly as bad as it sounds. I mean we're talking about something that could...” his voice broke.

 

“Hey,” his hand came to rest on Robbs cheek “don't think about that.”

 

“So I'm,” Robb pressed his lips together “I'm putting you in danger everytime I'm sick.”

 

“No,” Jons slightly tightened his hold “you're not. I mean, technically you do but, who cares?”

 

“I do!” he exclaimed “now that I know what it could become.”

 

“Which won't happen if I'm careful.” Jon answered reassuringly “Don't worry. Do you know how many doctors told me to change my job because of that? I haven't and nothing happened."

 

“Not yet. I'll always worry, no matter what you say “ Robb reasoned   ”which is why I won't let you leave this house for the next 24 hours, at least.”

 

“Please, kill me.” he said but Robb gave him a meaningful look "Sorry."

 

Robb just shrugged in return and looked at him, watching the expression on his features change  "What are you thinking?"

 

"Nothing." Jon shook his head but his smirk betrayed him "just a silly thought."

 

"Say it!" Robb asked curiously.

 

"I'm thinking! Trying not sound like a bloddy romantic, okay?" Robb would have explained things, pretty complicated most likely but he would have just blurted out what he thought but Jon rather furrowed his brow and fumbled for words until he was sick of it and just said what was on his mind "Alright whatever."

Robb smirked internally _And here we go._

"You're allowed to laugh if it's complete bollocks what I say but...but sometimes I still don't get why you're here with me and not somewhere else with another bloke."

 

"What?" Robb brows furrowed in confusion.

 

"Ok, it was absolute bollocks, just forget it."

 

"No it wasn't, but why would you think that?"

 

"Because after the accident it was like...like I had turned invisible. Most people just ignored me, it was like I wasn't there but you...ok fuck that, now it really sounds like straight out of a fucking film."

 

"No," Robb smiled "People in films don't swear as much as you do."

 

"I love you."

 

"Love you too."

 

Robb brought their lips together again, he felt the tender touch of Jons hand and the back of his neck and leaned into the touch. No further explanation needed.

Sadly, the moment was interrupted by the doorbell. Robb wanted to get up and get it but Jon held him back and said "Whoever it is can wait." before pulling him close again but a couple of seconds later the doorbell rung again, longer this time.

 

"I'm gonna get it." Robb said at last and quickly went to the bedroom to grab a pair of sweatpants and a jumper before hurrying to the front door.

 

He turned the lock and a whiff of cold winter air hit him. "Yes?"

 

In front of him stood a petite woman, clad in a a red coat which stood in stark contrast to her her light blonde hair and big blue eyes "Hi, uhm, are you Jon Snow?"

 

"No, I'm Robb," he smiled warmly at her when he saw her nervous fidgeting "his fiancé."

 

"Dany," she smiled as well now although a little hesitant "and I...think I'm his cousin."

 

 

 

 


	52. Chapter 52

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So since this is Chapter 50 (to be honest I never thought I would get to 50 :D ) I kind of felt like sharing the story behind the story, because this is not an entirely made up fic.   
> It was inspired by how my brother met his husband.   
> Still, 95% of the story and its charcters are fictional but chapter 2 for example happened in real life exactly how it is described here. Of course I talked to my brother about it before publishing the story and he was actually quite fond of the idea.   
> He alway says you don't love someone for what they are but for who they are and I felt like that is a thought worth sharing. 
> 
> Robert and Patrick this is for you, you weirdos! I love you!
> 
> P.S. : Yeah, my brother is actually called Robert, which was what inspired me to write this AU. Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed up to this point!

After overcoming the initial moment of suprise Robb had asked Dany to wait a moment while he went to tell Jon, who looked at him like he'd been the first person he'd ever seen in his life after Robb had finished speaking.

"She says she's what?"

 

"Your cousin." Robb repeated.

 

"That can't be." Jon shook his head disbelievingly.

 

"We should at least let her inside." he retorted with a shrug "It's freezing out there."

 

"Fine." Jon looked back at him with his brow drawn together "But I should find some clothes first."

 

"Yeah, I reckon you should." Robb winked and grinned when the other rolled his eyes.

 

While Jon was gone he quickly put the kettle on, tidied up the couch a little and then went back to the front door "Sorry to have kept you waiting out here in the cold."

 

"No worries," Dany said kindly and stepped inside "after all I showed up here uninvitedly."

 

She took off her coat and followed Robb to the living room.

"Sorry for the uh," he made a vague gesture around the not exactly tidy living room "we didn't really expect anyone. Would you like some tea?"

 

"I'd love some, yeah." she smiled shyly.

Just about when Robb wanted to ask her to sit down the bedroom door opened.

 

"Hello."

 

Dany whirled around "Oh uh, hi!" they mustered each other for a short moment before she approached him a little awkwardly "I'm Danaerys, but most people just call me Dany."

 

"Jon, nice to meet you."

Although they shook hands the awkwardness between them stayed until Robb emerged the kitchen with a tea tray and they gathered around the coffee table.

 

"You don't sound like you're from Britian." Robb chipped in politely.

 

"Guilty," Dany grinned "I grew up in the States."

 

"You had a long journey then."

 

"Yeah, I'm staying at th 'Red Keep' and it's really nice once I got over the jet-lag."

 

"So what brings you here then?"

Robb felt like face-palming. _Screw Jon for being straightforward._

 

"Right, think I should explain," if she was suprised she managed to hide it quite well "My mum and dad never told me who or where my grandparents were, or the rest of my family. All my life I wanted to know who my family was but only after my mum died a little over a year ago I really started looking into it, and then I stumbled across Wintertown and the name Snow, so I started digging deeper. Bottom line, my mum was your dad's sister apparently. I found the names of my," she paused and gast a glance at Jon who watched her intentely "our grandparents. And then yours."

 

None of the three spoke after she was finished, only Robb put his hand on Jons and looked at him questioningly.

 

"I don't know what to say," he started "I only know my parents from photographs and granddad never mentioned anyone."

 

"I would like to meet him, if that's possible."

 

"He died over 15 years ago."

 

"Oh, uhm," she fiddled with the hem of her skirt  "All I know is that he apparently kind of hated my father so they ran off to the states and never got in touch again." Dany added.

 

"That's shit but, what do you want from me?"

Robb could almost physically feel the coldness radiating off Jon. 

 

Dany straightened her back "I don't know, I think I should go." she stammered and got up suddenly "Sorry for interrupting."

With that she turned on her heel and hurried towards the door, Robb called out for her to wait but the front door fell shut behind her before he even reached her. 

 

"Was that really necessary?" he asked in a slightly annoyed tone and turned around.

 

 "What?"

 

 "She could be the last living family you have." Robb continued in his 'don't give me shit' voice.

 

"I'm fine without, Robb."

 

"Don't you think you're making a bit too easy for yourself?"

 

"How do you mean?" Jon asked when Robb flopped down across from him.

 

"She came here all the way from America to find what's left her family only to get brushed off by you, she seems really nice why did you do that?"

 

"Don't know." he admitted defensively.

 

"Look, I know you're not the biggest fan of new people, but just talk to her alright? For me?"

 

Jons answer was cut short by the front door opening "Oi! Back from the woods!" Ygritte called from the hallway and shortly after that she strolled into the living room with a bag slung over her shoulder only to stop dead in her tracks when she spotted Robb.

 

"What did I miss?"

 

Robb and Jon exachanged a look "Quite a bit."

 

 


	53. Road Trippin'-Red Hot Chili Peppers

"So for the record, you're telling me that you two are back together and that this girl showed up claiming to be your cousin? Fuck's sake, I'm away for two days and I miss everything!" Ygritte exclaimed after they had spent the better part of the evening telling her what happened.

"Yeah it's been a," Robb cast a glance at Jon "eventful weekend."

"How was Scotland, by the way?" the latter asked.

"Cold, rainy, windy. Tormunds family's lovely though, spent the better part of the time eating." she answered with a smile "And you? Up and about again?"

"Yeah, almost." Jon answered and glanced at the clock "but I think I'll get an early night."

"It's barely half nine." Robb smirked.

"So?" he transferred back to the chair and arranged his legs before leaning forward to quickly kiss Robb "Night. Night 'Gritte!"

"Sleep tight." she said.

Robb was about to get up as well but Ygritte looked at him with pursed lips and eyebrows raised accusingly.

"Am I in for a scolding?"

"No, you're in for this!" she smacked his head.

"Ow!" Robb ducked away and rubbed the back of his head.

"Fuck's sake Robb, what were you thinking?" she demanded.

"I don't know I...guess I wasn't thinking."

"Yeah, I could agree on this." Ygrittes features softened then "So did you work it out then?"

He hummed in agreement "I hope so. I nipped round yesterday to, I actually don't even know why but we ended up talking about us and everything but it made me  realise how much I don't know. I mean,"

"I know," she interrupted him kindly "it was good that you were there, Jon never takes care of himself until someone makes him. It was the same for me in the beginning, he never said anything and I didn't know what was going on but we soon had to understand that it doesn't work that way. You only know what he lets you know and I reckon that was the bare minimum up to now."

"You could say that," Robb agreed "but I could have prevented that by just asking."  
  
"True but I reckon most people would consider it blunt or insensitive, not that you are, but I think it's not the easiest thing to talk about."

"Probably not."

"See. No one's going to hold it against you that you didn't ask."

"Jon said that he was glad I don't know what he's talking about."

"Yeah and you should be glad as well." Ygritte looked him square in the eye "Imagine two of your best freinds die before your own eyes and you wake up a week after that only to have somebody telling you that you are never going to walk or stand or trip over a fucking step again. Or that your boyfriend left after hearing your prognosis." she snorted at the memory and shook her head "It's part of who you are, the way you carry yourself shows a lot about your personality, but if that is taken away from you, you  change." she cocked her head "don't look so shocked, Robb. It was only the other day that I was thinking that you two probably wouldn't have liked each other if you met before the accident."

"Why that?" Robb asked curiously, glad that the mood lightened a little.

"Well." she began "What were you doing, shall we say five years ago?"

He chuckled "I was being a very proper young man, going to uni and all."

"I can imagine" she cackeled which earned her a look.

"What?"

"You're the born poster boy."

"Whatever." he waved it off.

"D'you want to know what Jon was doing while you were working on becoming a role model?" her grin got wider and wider by the second and Robb nodded "He was pretty much shagging everything that walked on two legs which finally earned him the nickname 'the firecracker'." Ygritte laughed at his suprised expression.

"Really?"

"Really. More weekends than not I watched some random bloke trying to sneak out and trust me, we had more than one fight over that."

"I can't even properly imagine you two fighting." Robb said and draped his arm over the backrest of the couch.

"One more thing that changed," she retorted pensively "we both have a temper, believe me, but I reckon we just have less reasons to fight."

"I already had more than one taste of that temper," he chuckled and scooted a little closer to her "Thank you for being so honest with me."

"Someone has to be, aye?" she asked and bumped their shoulder together "But I'm glad that you are here too, Robb. Not long before you met, just after Mr. Mormont died it was...Depression was no word for it Robb, it was bad. Mormont had opened us so many possibilitys, he gave us the flat and all and after his death we were both devastated but Jon took it badly and, I don't want to make you feel guilty or anything, but I am more than happy that I don't have to witness that again."

Robb wrapped his arm around her shoulders "Do you miss it? The time before...?"

"You mean before bad timing screwed our lives? Of course I do," she said naturally "Jon decided to go all Sensei over it but I'm not. I miss our friends, especially Grenn. He looked like the gruffest bloke you could imagine but he the sweetest man I've ever met in my life, he would always listen and just be there for you. And Pyp...he was an amazing singer and always in a good mood," Ygrittes smile didn't hide the shadow of sadness "and Jon was so alive. Christ's sake, our lives were perfect and then suddenly we were dealing with SCI and post traumatic stress disorder and all the stuff that comes with it."

Robbs gaze shifted as he remembered

_In the dead of night he felt himself waking up, blinking lazily only to find Jon sitting next to him, curled forward with his arms crossed tightly across his chest and breaths coming out in rapid gasps. Suddenly wide awake Robb sat up as well "Hey, what is it?" he asked gently and put his hand tenderly on his boyfrieds shoulder, causing him to jerk away from the touch "Bad dream?"  
_

_"Something like it." Jon whispered._

_Robb then lay them both down and wrapped his arms firmly around his shoulders until the shaking stopped._

"See, and suddenly things make sense." she said as if she had read his mind "I'm not telling you all that shit because I want to make you feel bad or anything, I do it because Jon wouldn't. He doesn't want to burden you with it and  I'm not saying this is easy but it helps you to understand things."

"A lesser person would have left him," Robb smiled at her "but you didn't."

"I love him too much and he's done so much for me like, both of us stayed with a couple of foster families but after a while they all ended up getting sick of us. Anyway, we were fourteen, perhaps fifteen and I was with a  family but when I didn't do what they told me to they...beat me. When Jon found out he decided to get me out there because we both knew how slow the administration was, so he snuck in at night but they noticed and the father, he broke Jons arm but we managed to make enough noise to raise attention and...the guy ended up in jail."

"Fuck." was the only thing he managed to say.

"Yeah but you know what?" Ygritte begun and smiled again "in the last year Jon has been more himself than in all three years before that. I don't know how you do that but keep up."

He laughed then, a relieving laugh which eased the darkness her words had raised but later in bed he studied Jons sleeping face and the things Ygritte had said came back to his mind, he tried to block them out but failed.

Meanwhile Ygritte sat in the armchair in her bedroom with her iPod on her lap, a playlist she hadn't put on for a long time taking her thoughts away. The conversation with Robb hadn't been easy for her either and after closing the bedroom door behind her she had decided to replace the difficult memories with pleasant ones.

_.....wishing it was more like a fanatasy, where every day suprises me...*_

Pyp had taught her how to dance Salsa many summers ago and she still had to chuckle when thinking about how she had stumbled over her feet the first time.

... _dancing in the moonlight, everybody's feeling warm and bright....*_

Val, one of her best friends since secondary school had insisted for her to come along to a party in that student house and although she could think of better ways to spend a night she had agreed. They had shared a spliff and Ygritte had more than enjoyed the looks of the pretty blond in the corner basically undressing her. More so when he actually did.

_...she gives me money when I'm in need....*_

The snow had been six feet high...at least it had felt like it when she made her way through it, trudging next to Jon because the ugly little rot box of an Alfa he called his car had decided to die on them two miles outisde Wintertown, so they didn't have much choice left than to walk along the road until they got back to civilisation to call an AA truck. The only thing making the whole situation a little more bearable had been the iPod so they could at least listen to music instead of bickering the whole way.

_...she acts like summer and walks like rain...*_

Ygritte leaned against the bar and nudged Val with her elbow before pointing towards the corner across the crowded pub. The two women exchanged a smile when they spotted Loras Tyrell gently pushing Jon back against the wall to kiss him passionately.

"Lucky bastard." Val had muttered and Ygritte couldn't help but agree.

 

She pulled her legs up on the armchair and leaned her temple against her knees with a dreamy look on her face. She wouldn't go to bet, not yet.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so, songs listed as following  
> Wishing it was - Santana feat. Eagle Eye Cherry  
> Dancing in the moonlight - Toploaders  
> I've got a woman - Ray Charles  
> Drops of Jupiter - Train
> 
> I just had to add some happiness at the end, this chapter turned out a lot more depressing than I originally intended it to be.


	54. Midnight City-M83

Robb lay awake the better part of the night with too many things running through his head to sleep, after all the things Ygritte had told him were a lot to take in. When he finally managed to fall asleep his inner clock told him that morning couldn't be too far away.

A couple of hours later he slowly stirred awake, the rain which had been clouding the sky over the last couple of days had given way to bright sunshine streaming through the window and he could hear faint noises from the en suite. He stretched lazily before getting up to steal a shirt from the wardrobe and heading to the bathroom where he found Jon toweling off his hair and humming along to M83.

 

"I thought you were physically incapable of sleeping that long." Jon said in amused tone as he entered and started rumaging through the shelf in search for the toothpaste.

 

"Couldn't sleep last night." he answered and started going over the next shelf.

 

"Everything alright?" Jon tapped his side and handed him the toothpaste.

 

"Yeah sure." Robb said quickly and sat down on the edge of the tub "Cheers." He brushed his teeth while Jon was shaving and although he always enjoyed the sight of his topless fiance his mood was strangely dampened. His thoughts kept drifting back to the previous evening and although he didn't like it he was loooking at Jon in a different way now. What Jon had said to him was right but he didn't know what to make of it yet.

He rinsed his mouth and stole a kiss from Jon who laughed and wiped a streak of shaving foam from Robbs upper lip.

 

"You look good in Nirvana." Jon remarked and Robb flipped back imaginary hair with a smirk and sat down on the edge of the tub again.

 

“Why are you still using that old thing?” Robb asked a bit later as he watched Jon put the old razor with the ebony handle on the sink and dry his face with a towel “Looks like one of Sweeney Todds.”

 

"It's and heirloom you git and it's not old it's antique."

 

"Fancy," he said with a hint of irony "whose was it?"

 

“It was my fathers, and my grandfathers before that.” he answered “he gave it to me not long before he died, told me that my father would have given it to me and that I should I pass it on to my eldest son as well.”

 

“Did he know you are...?”

 

“Of course not!” Jon added quickly but then shook his head “it's better that he didn't, don't know what he would have said if I had told him, 'You do know that our proud family name will die out because of your escapades' something like that.”

 

“Yeah it took my father some time as well but he's alright with it now I guess,” he nodded “why didn't you live with your grandparents if they were still alive?”

 

Jon just shrugged “They were old.”

 

“Yeah but still, they were family..."

 

“Robb, it wasn't like Oliver Twist okay?” Jon interrupted him and grinned “apart from that, Ygritte and me spent quite a while with foster families and stuff but we always got send back.”

 

“Why that?” he asked although he didn't know why after everything Ygritte had told him and still, Jons answers only confirmed what Ygritte had told him.

 

“Because we were little shits, that's why!” Jon answered dryly which caused Robb to chuckle softly “Besides, if I had stayed with them perhaps none of this would have happened, and I would have never met you.”

 

Robb leaned forward with a barely hidden smirk on his face “That's one of the most romantic things you ever said.”

 

Jon decided to wave it off “Well then you better remember it.” he pulled the elastic from his hair while Robb stil looked at the razor.

 

“What's that?” he gestured towards the three sets of letters carved into the blade by the hilt.

 

“Initials,” Jon answered and lay his index finger on the blade “great-grandfather, grandfather, father. Long line of Snows.”

 

“The only one missing is you.”

 

“There are things more important than my initials on a razor. Anyway, why are you so curious about that?”

 

“Don't know, I just realised that you know so much about my family but I don't know anything about yours.” not exactly true, Robb had to admit.

 

"Me neither apparently." he replied dryly and tossed the towel on the edge of the sink.

 

"Are you going to call Dany today?" Robb asked then as they went back to the bedroom.

 

"Alright, alright." Jon grumbled and waved his hand at him before opening the wardrobe "If you stop annoying me then."

 

"Oh come on, it won't be that bad." he flopped down on the bed next to Jon who transferred onto it to get dressed "She seemed really nice."

 

"Whatever."

 

Robb pressed his lips together in determination, leaned over to grab his phone from the nightstand  then moved across the bed and sat on Jons hips with his legs on either side of his thighs.

 

"What are you doing?" he asked in a slightly annoyed tone.

 

Robb held out his phone "I'm not letting you get up until you made that call."

 

"You're being unfair."

 

"No, you're being unfair. Dany seems like a genuinely nice person and she deserves some answers." Robb reasoned "How bad can it be?"

 

"Fine," Jon muttered with a pout on his face and took the phone. Robb crossed his arms with a triumphant smirk while Jon googled the phone number "Hi, is this the Red Keep Hotel?"

 

 


	55. Kiss Me- Sixpence None The Richer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I totally blame Valentine's Day, heart shaped chocolate and red wine for how this turned out! Actually i planned on writing the conversation between Dany and Jon in detail but I found it a bit tedious to read so there you go, hope you like it:)

Robb was nervous.

Jon was out to meet up with Dany and he had been running some errands earlier and returned home with an envelope, the whole way home he had kept a hand on the outside of his bag as if he was afraid he would lose it. Back in the flat he had made sure to put it on the top shelf of the wardrobe. Before going out he had finished studying because he had already known that he wouldn't be able to focus on it after coming home and although he didn't have anything to do really apart from waiting fot Jon he was buzzing with excitement. A thousand things ran through his head and he smiled like an idiot, partly because he just had to and tried to let it all out now to not raise any suspicions later. He had to keep it at a secret, for now at least.

Light flashed trough the kitchen window when a car pulled up in the backyard and a couple of minutes later the heavy sound of the front door falling into lock caused him to look towards the door. Jon appeared in the doorway soon after and dropped his keys and wallet onto the cabinet next to it before wheeling towards the couch

 

“Hey.”

 

They kissed briefly because curiousity got the best of Robb “How was it?”

 

Jon took his time answering “I don't know. Weird?”

 

“Weird how?”

 

“Not like, between us, there was no awkward silence or something but apparently granddad didn't appreciate the relationship of her parents. It went that far that they were literally kept from seeing each other so they ran away to the states and broke of all contact.” he shrugged and rubbed his palms together “It just feels weird that there is this whole part of the family which neither her nor me knew about, her mum didn't even know that her brother and sister in law had died.”

 

Robb nodded but it was hard for him to imagine how it must feel like “How did she find you then?”

 

“She just googled Wintertown and Snow and found our website.” Jon chuckled which caused Robb to do the same.

 

“The internet, there you go.” he said and mustered him “You alright with that though?”

 

“Yeah,” Jon drew out the word “I mean, she was quite...curious about everything.”

 

Robb didn't need to ask about what Dany had been curious, after all they weren't exactly the most regular couple. “I can imagine.”

 

“She's rather nice though,” he put his elbow on the back of the couch and rested his temple against his knuckled “and she plans on staying in Wintertown.”

 

“Really? How come?”

 

“She's doing something with design so she can basically live wherever.” Jon explained “And she said she needs 'a break from L.A.”

 

“What?” Robb exclaimed with fake-bewilderment “Does she even know how the weather can get around here?”

 

“Yeah thats what I said.”

Over the course of the evening Robbs thoughts returned to the envelope and he began to lay out a plan for the next day.

It was a Tuesday which meant that there we no lectures he would have to be at, Jon and Ygritte would be there in the morning but later in the afternoon Jon would go to therapy and Ygritte, who was already inducted into his plan anyway, would do the books. The second Jon left the house Robb went to the bedroom to fetch the duffel bag he had hidden on the top shelf of the wardrobe. Ygritte watched him hurry around, setting everything up and smiled to herself before leaving.

Before he knew it Robb was done and the time he had left turned out to be longest twenty minutes of his life. As soon as he heard a car pull up he quietly went to the window and watched Jon get out of his car but instead of entering the the flat he read the sign Robb had put on the door. Robb bit his lip as he watched him cross the yard, then he heard the door of the workshop being opened and he had to clasp a hand over his mouth to keep quiet.

The workshop was completely dark except for two string lights which were laid out like a patch from the door towards a table in the centre. Upon said table lay another string light which formed a circle around a plain white envelope.

Jon picked up the envelope and opened it carefully and what he found inside made his breath stop for a second.

 

 

_You are cordially invited to the wedding of_

_Robert R. Stark & Jonathan Snow_

_01.08.2016_

 

It said in black letters on a card of hand made paper with a discreet silver frame around it. Slowly the words he had just read seeped into his mind and he clasped a hand over his mouth in suprise.

 

“It's just a design.” Robb said and stepped into the light.

 

Jons hand dropped and he looked at him with wide eyes “It's beautiful.”

 

Robb breathed a sigh of relief, he had admittedly worried about this quite a lot before actually doing it, after all he hadn't told anybody apart from Theon and Ygritte. He closed the distance between them and as soon as his hand came into reach Jon pulled him onto his lap to kiss him passionately.

 

“Let's get married."

 

 


	56. Chapter 56

“No.” Robb and Jon said in unison.

 

Sansas mouth dropped open and she bristled at their rejection “What? Why?”

 

The two exachanged a 'who is going to break it to her' look. “These flowers are pink, Sansa.” Robb said finally.

 

“They're not, its called rose.” she shook her head in dismayal and put the sheet in the back of the huge pink folder taking up most of the space on the table. 

 

“Do we look rose to you?” Robb asked and carded a hand through his hair. 'Grab a coffee' had turned into 'I'm going to plan you wedding' when Sansa dropped the folder onto the table and he was slowly starting to lose patience. 

 

Her eyes alternated between her brother in his beige jumper and Jon in his Joy Division shirt and she rolled her eyes with an exaggerated sigh “Alright, fine. What's the alternative?”

 

Robb shrugged “Don't know.”

 

“You like Cornflowers.” Jon suggested and looked at him. 

 

“Yeah, that would so work!” Sansa chipped in “The invitation card has a silver frame right, blue and silver would look so nice!”

 

“Sounds nice,” Robb shrugged  “Jon?”

 

“Whichever you prefer,” he answered with a grin and held up his hands “I'm out when it comes to colour schemes.”

 

“Why do you two even get married if you don't care about the wedding." Sansa shook her head for the umpteenth time. 

 

"You don't mean that, sis." Robb said with a sigh. 

 

"Ok so, the only thing missing is your guest lists." she announced then and added "which I asked you to bring?" when neither of them reacted. She raised an eyebrow when she received two not exactly neatly folded pieces of paper but chose not to say anything but unfold the two lists and file them.

Robb breathed an internal sigh of relief when she announced sometime later that she had to be somewhere and left with the pink folder tucked under her arm and a flick of her hair. They stopped at Sainsbury's on the way home to get some groceries and Robb rambled about his sister and her folder until they were back at the flat which Jon found rather amusing.

"Hey, you're supposed to have my back!" Robb exclaimed and unlocked the front door "I can't marry you if you take my sisters side."

 

"I'm always on you side," Jon chuckled "but this has been going for almost an hour, Robb!"

 

"Yeah, and I could continue for another hour." he remarked under his breath as they entered the living room. The very moment they opened the door Ygritte rose from the arm of the couch as if she had been waiting for them.

 

"Hi." she said and looked at them with a mix of nervousness and anticipation.

 

For a few seconds they just looked at each other before Jon asked "Everything alright?"

 

"Yeah." she answered and shifted her weight "I have something to tell you though."

 

Aagain, nothing happened and Robb contemplated putting the groceries away but the decision was taken from him "Put your stuff away, I'll make us some tea first." Ygritte said finally and gestured towards the kitchen.They followed her and she put the kettle on and fiddled with the teabags until the boys were finished and they had gathered around the table, each with a steaming mug before them. Ygritte took a deep breath.

"I'm going to move out." she announced finally "Tormund and I found a place. I didn't want to tell you before anything was settled but now it is and,yeah." she finished with a shrug and her eyes darted between Robb and Jon. It was obvious that although she was nervous about their reaction she was relived that it was out and even more so when they silmultaneously started to smile.

 

"That's great." Robb was the first to break the silence and Jon nodded in agreement.

 

"You glad to have me out of the way, aye?" she asked with a mischieveous flash in her eye.

 

"No! That's not what I meant, I meant that..." Robb broke off his own rambling when her and Jon started to laugh and she waved off. He muttered something unillegiable and Jon kissed his cheek "Poor you."

 

Robb fake-pouted "At least then you can't team up anymore."

 

"One more month, then you've got only Jon getting on you nerves." she replied not without a hint of heaviness in her voice.

 

"Wow, that's soon." the latter said and Ygritte nodded.

 

"I know but it was take it or leave it and the place is really lovely. Besides," she agreed and paused shortly before carrying on "you're getting married and this here should be yours."

 

"Ygritte..."

 

"Jon, I made my decision."

 

Things went on as usual, they cooked and had dinner together but it was as if a sudden melancholy had settled into the house. Neither of them admitted it but it was there and it seemed somehow final when Ygritte left after dinner to see Tormund. They stayed behind in a quiet flat and Robb saw his finaces solemn face and without second thought opened his laptop.

It wasn't until in the safe darkness of the bedroom that he told Jon "I sent my landlord the notice for my appartment." A rustle of the sheets was the only indication that he'd  heard him.

 

"I'm going to miss Ygritte." the words cut through the silence and Robb didn't know what to make of it before Jon continued "on the other hand it's about time you bring you own drawers and stop occupying mine."

 

Robb wound his arm around his waist and Jon kissed the crown if his head. He felt the other mans body relaxing against his but there was one more thing on his mind "Jon?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"About the list."

 

"Which list?"

 

"The guest list."

 

"Let's talk about it tomorrow." came the grumbled answer.

 

"No." Robb knew he wasn't going to get any sleep with this gnawing on his mind.

 

Jon sighed heavily but reached over to turn on the lamp on the bedside table and sat up a little "Ok, what is it?" he didn't do much to hide his annoyance.

 

Robb curled his lips and blinked "It's just, mine is so much longer than yours. There are so many Starks and Tullys who'll be offended if they don't get invited."

 

"So?"

 

"So there'll be way more of my people than yours!"

 

"Robb you are aware that there's no resolution to that." it was more of a statement than a question.

 

"Yeah but..."

 

"The wedding is in six months babe, you've got more than enough time to panic about stuff like that." Jon turned the light back off and pulled Robb close again who sighed and grumbled a little before falling silent as well.

Problem solved for now, but a little voice in Jons head told him that this wouldn't be the last time for the next couple of months.

 

 

 

 


	57. All the pretty girls - Kaleo

"I was kind of waiting for this to happen." Robb said and casually leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed.

Jon startled a little and looked at him from where he was tucked into the corner of the couch with his hands curled around a mug of tea "What to happen?"

He didn't answer but smiled softly and padded towards the couch, pulling  half of the blanket which wasn't covering his fiance over his lap after sitting down and let his head fall gently against the backrest "You to freak out."

"I'm not."

The words came out too quickly and a little wavery which didn't make it very difficult for Robb to see right through them "No but you're overthinking." he said matter if factly and cocked his head "Or has it become normal for you to stare into a cold mug of tea in the middle of the night?"

Jon said nothing in response but the look crossing his features was enough for Robb to know that he was right "Couldn't sleep that's all."

"Yeah it's hard to while you're busy brooding."

"I'm not brooding." he retorted and put the mug on the coffee table as if he had just realised that the tea had long gone cold.

"It's okay, remember how many times over the last couple of months I lost it over the stupidest things?" Robb said and his eyes became soft "But you're not me."

Jon worried his lip with his teeth and looked away briefly before answering "I can only think about what's been instead of what's to come." he admitted quietly "This is a happy time and all I think about is bad times. Christ, we're going to be married the day after tomorrow!"

"Tomorrow, actually" Robb felt his heart leap at the thought "It's already gone twelve."

"See."

This single word carried such a sense of defeat that Robb leaned over to plant a gentle kiss on his lips "I love you."

"Love you too."

"It's been a lot with Ygritte moving out and all." his thoughts briefly drifted back to the night before she left. He'd spent it at his own place by choice to give them space, the next day the sheets smelled like her and the smeared mascara stain on his pillow was enough for him to understand and not ask questions "Don't worry."

"I know I have to let go but...it's hard." there was a brief pause and Jon interlaced their fingers "Can't dwell on the past forever."

"I'd rather have you dwell on your vows." Robb gently poked his shoulder with two fingers.

"Babe..."

"You haven't even started,right?"

"I told you, I don't believe in it." Jon murmured into Robbs hair and kissed his temple.

"And I told you that I don't care," he retorted with fake blatancy.

"Robb."

"For me?" he asked with the best doe-eyes he could manage at two in the morning.

Jon snorted and gently shoved Robbs shoulder so he lay on his back next to him. Robb giggled quietly and wound his arm around the other mans waist to pull him close again before kissing him sweetly.

Robb hummed contentedly but his fiances face turned serious again "If there's one thing I learned in life then that nothing is sure."

"How do you mean?" he asked and rested the side of his head on Jons arm.

"What if I promise something I can't keep?"

Suddenly awake Robb raised his head "Why would you say that?"

"I love you, more than anyone else in the world but what if we wake up one day and the love is gone? Then all the big vows aren't worth a thing."

"Don't you belive in marriage?" he asked, a lump of panic fomring in his throat.

"I believe in you and me, not a piece of paper." Jon gently carressed Robbs cheekbone "But I'll do whatever makes you happy."

Robb felt his heart swell with such a pure sense of love, of adoration that his eyes suddenly stung and while the biggest smile spread on his face a tear escaped the corner of his eyes. Jon looked at him the way he always did when Robb did something he couldn't quite understand "Is this good?"

Robb laughed and wiped his cheeks before answering "Yes. There's nothing better."

 

 


	58. Chapter 58

Robb was caught in a dream, he was sure he was, because Jon delicately sliding a golden wedding band on his ring finger with the words "I do."  
Galaxies fell through him, everything seemed to shine in vibrant colour, so alive and beautiful was this moment. From his peripheral vision he could see Ygritte, stunningly beutiful in her tailored black suit and bright turquoise heels and blouse, whose eyes shone with tears of joy and he knew Theon was behind hs own chair.  
Everyone was there, Robbs parents and siblings all next to each other in the first row and Ned had his arm lovingly around his wife. Sam and Gilly were there as well, his arm never leaving his wife and her rounding belly. There were Jeyne, Thorren Karstark and Jon Umber, all holding their significant others hands and even Edd Tollett had a smile playing around the corners of his mouth. Val was next to him and gently nudged his shoulder. Renly leaned against his fiances shoulder and when Robb had asked why Loras Tyrell had been invited Jon had laughed and explained that after the break up they had made a drunken promise to invite the other to their wedding if it would ever come to it. Robb found that there was nothing he could say to that so he accepted it but not without wonder.  
Daenaerys was there as well, having found a place in Wintertown she had become part of their lives without any of them really noticing and she was so grateful for it she could barely put it into words.  
All the people they loved had come together but when Jons hand came to rest on the side of his neck and they shared their first kiss as a married couple Robb forgot about all of them, he forgot about the place, the time, everything that mattered to him was Jon, the love of his lfe and his best friend.  
His soulmate.  
It was one of the days that would live on forever in their memory, blurry and sharp at the same time, feeling high from emotion.  
The way the white string lights lightning the entrance to the garden of Jeynes Cafe mirrored in Jons eyes, glowing ike stars in the night, Robb felt ike he had never been surrounded by so much beauty in his entire life. Sansa had promised not to overdo it and upon seeing it the fruits of her work he was all but stunned.  
Blue and white bouqets of various wild flowers in small glass vases of different shapes decorated the round, wooden tables. String lights with big, stylized lightbulbs illuminated the roof of the marquee protecting the garden from the unpredictable northern weather. More glasses with candles lit inside were scattered on the small lawn next to the marquee and big pillows and beanbags with blankets on created a relaxed yet festive athmosphere.  
Soon the whole area was alive with chatter and laughter, good food and the smell of summer. Robb watched his family at the table next to theirs and grinned at the frosting smeared around Rickons mouth and his mother scolding Bran for constantly fiddling with his phone. The latter looked up and his eyes met his brother before he said something to Catelyn and got up to walk towards his brother.

"You said it's ok bring someone right?" he asked in an almost hushed tone.

"Sure." Robb asnwered oblivious of the hidden hint.

"Ok uhm,-" Bran was interrupted by a piece of cutlery klicking against a glass before the whole marquee fell quiet.

Theon rose from his chair with slight hesitation and all heads turned towards him. For a brief moment he fidgeted with his cuff buttons before sayin "Uhm,hi." collective chuckle "In case you don't know me I'm Theon, Robbs best man."

"Hi Theon!" Thorren and Jon Umber said in unison and, chuckles followed and Robb leaned over to whisper into Jons ear.

Theon shook his head with a grin and carried on "Ok so, when Robb asked me to be his best men my first,okay no my second thought was 'shit I'll have to prepare a speech'. And I treid, I really tried hard because Robb is my best mate you know but I couldn't come up with anything for the life of me so I'm an just going to say two things: First, Robb and Jon, I wish you two all the best in the world, I love you but second: Jon, if you hurt my mate, I'll hurt you. But otherwise you're not even that bad." He added with a mischieveous wink "Cheers."

"I guess Im gonna look for new friends." Robb chuckled after Theon had sat down again. He let his gaze drift across the room and saw Bran walking through the entrance, straight towards their table with a tall young man in tow. Robb nudged Jons elbow and pointed towards them.

"Robb, Jon, there's someone I'd like you to meet," Bran said before taking a deep breath "this is Jojen. My boyfriend. Jojen, this Robb, my brother and Jon, his husband."

"Hi," Jojen said with a genuine smile "and congratulations." After the initial moment of suprise Robb rose from his seat and smiled at his younger brother before pulling im into a hug and shakin Jojens hand before Jon did the same.

"Welcome." Robb said fondly just when Ygritte joined them "Hey what's going on here?" she asked cheerfully before reconizing Robbs brother "Oh hey, how's it going? And who's your date?" Bran laughed "That's Jojen, my boyfriend." "What? Oh my god that's great!" she exclaimed and hugged him without warning.

"Thanks." Bran said almost a little self-conciously before his mother appeared behind him and he excused himself. Robb and Ygritte sat down again and there was a beat of silence before Jon spoke 

"Day of announcements."

"Aye." Robb agreed but Ygritte stayed quiet for a moment with a contemplative look on her face.

"Hey 'Gritte, you dreaming?"

She almost startled and her gaze wandered between them "I've got an announcement of my own." she finally admitted. Robb and Jon looked at her in anticipation and she knew that there was no way back now "I'm pregnant."

For the second time that day there was a moment of initial suprise while the words sunk in and she felt her heart pound against her ribcage.

"Have you told Tormund?" Jon was the first to ask.

"Yeah," she answered "told him straight away and he was really happy although you know, it wasn't really planned. And speaking of, please don't tell anyone yet, I didn't even want to tell you but I just couldn't."

Her rambling was interrupted by Jon who wheeled next to her and pulled her into a firm hug "Don't worry."

"Thank you." she retorted with a touched smile "Tormund's great and I love him but I'm happy that I've got you two as well."

"That's what family's for, aye?"

And that's what they were, after everything that had happened, all the ups and downs they had found each other.

That's where they were, that's where they belonged.

Together.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my od this is actually it! I can barely believe this is actually done.  
> I want to thank everyone who read and reviewed, you are fucking amazing!!!!  
> If you're not sick if this verse yet I highly recommend the upcoming sequel, I reckon I'll upload the first chapter pretty soon because I'm too excited :D   
> Again, thank you all for reading!  
> I love you my fluffy unicorns!!!


	59. Final Note

Hi everyone, 

my Name is Patrick. Rose told me she dropped a note about her brother Robert and me before but in case you don't know I'm her brothers husband and I'm a T9 incomplete paraplegic.  
The first time she told me that the way Rob and I met inspired her to write a story I was a little confused but, to be honest, it was cute as well and, most importantly it shows one very important thing: Paraplegia is not the end of the world.  
Yes, it sucks and yes, life would be a good deal more easy without it but hey, what can you do? It's a pretty convenient excuse to skip leg day but not the rest of your life.  
My life was turned upside down when I was twenty and at that time I thought that this was it, I would spent the next 60 years feelin miserable and hating the world but hands down, nobody can be in a bad mood forever. Things got better and I learned how to adjust.  
I don't want to tell you all the 'belive in yourself and you can do everything' shit, if you're 5 feet tall you won't be a basketball player, but you can still take what you've got and make the best of it. Be kind to yourself and don't try too hard and you'll see, life goes on.  
Believe me, I never even thought about relationships anymore after my accident let alone getting married but here I am, married to the man I love and listenin to my kids arguing whilst I'm trying to focus.  
Life isn't always unicorns and rainbows but we all have problems so try and focus on the good things in your life, the little things you look forward to and the rest will fall into place. 

Have a good one.

**Author's Note:**

> Please mind the gap between the chapter and the edge of reality.
> 
> Feedback is always welcome, love ya bye -xx


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